My freedom is not negotiable


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One of my favorite words is "Freedom", freedom represents beneficial things for life. Living without ties, without fear of what people will say, generates an extraordinary peace of mind that allows me to unfold my essence to the fullest. Of course, I believe that no one has absolute freedom. There are many factors that prevent us from being fully free. For example, we cannot control time, it simply passes and leaves its traces in our body. So to speak, if we are not careful we can become slaves of time. As the years go by, gray hair, aches and wrinkles appear, but we also accumulate enriching experiences if we know how to make good use of time. If we do so, time will not be a tyrant in our lives but an ally to grow in many ways.

On the contrary, there are situations that we can handle but that unfortunately anchor us in a somewhat absurd way, this happens when we voluntarily give our freedom to another person. When this happens we get into terrible emotional dependencies that inhibit and harm the person who suffers from it. Too much attachment to one person shortens our freedom and makes us fearful and incapable of leading a life our own way, since we will always be looking for the approval of the person to whom we have given control of our life.

I remember when I was in high school I was very attached to a classmate. We did everything together; homework, shopping for school events and even went for walks. On one occasion, she didn't go to school and I felt lost. Although I had someone to talk to because all my classmates were there, I didn't know what to talk about because I simply hadn't taken the time to get to know them. At that moment I realized that I couldn't make my world just about my classmates, so I began to broaden my horizons and get to know the rest of my classmates.

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That moment when I felt alone and lost because my friend had not gone to school was extremely unpleasant. It was a terrifying emptiness that I experienced and I made radical decisions about it. From then on I became friends with almost everyone in my class, it was really spectacular to meet such a variety of personalities and to be able to share with everyone. I no longer felt afraid if someone missed class because I had expanded my circle of friends and there would always be someone to talk to and enjoy the company.

As I grew older I encountered some disappointments with some friends and this led me to learn to be selective in my choice of friends, but I never had just one friend again, I always looked for ways to have several. Despite the disappointments I did not close the doors of my heart, I simply learned to choose carefully with whom to share confidential matters and not to get too attached to anyone. Today I have my closest friends with whom I know I can count on and they count on me too, however, none of them have my freedom in their hands nor do I have theirs in my hands. We are there for each other without imposing anything and if one of us misses a recreational meeting we miss it but we still do it because we are not emotionally dependent on each other.

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Freedom is extremely valuable, it allows me to feel good about myself and helps me to enjoy moments of solitude. I enjoy being accompanied but I also enjoy being alone. If I have a moment of breakdown I know I can count on great friends and I communicate with them, they are authentic friends who respect the limits of what true friendship is, in this way we take care not to fall into emotional dependencies.

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The photos are my own, taken with a Realme 7i.



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15 comments
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Hi @abisag,

I like that you found a way early on not to focus your life on one person. I agree with you that having friends is an important part of socializing and your affections but at the same time you know how to enjoy your solitude. I wish you a big hug!

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Hola amiga bella 😘😘😘.

Thank you for your beautiful comment, that's right, you have to have a balance in every aspect of life, especially emotionally.

I love you very much ❤️❤️

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On the contrary, there are situations that we can handle but that unfortunately anchor us in a somewhat absurd way, this happens when we voluntarily give our freedom to another person.

There’s no way you’ll be free when you allow someone else's words or actions to determine how your day (or your life in extreme cases) will go. That is why I don’t believe in and heavily discourage the “you’re my joy” type of thinking even in relationships. Each person in the relationship should be their own person and source of joy and shouldn’t need the other person to be happy.

On one occasion, she didn't go to school and I felt lost

That moment when I felt alone and lost because my friend had not gone to school was extremely unpleasant. It was a terrifying emptiness that I experienced and I made radical decisions about it.

I had something like this happen to me a while back when I was in school. I used to have a planned weekend routine to hang out with a certain person and one weekend, she left campus for home. I literally didn’t know what to do with myself. Seriously. That was the first time I realized our hangout was becoming an addictive routine for me. Basically, after I met her, I didn’t spend any weekends by myself until that one when she left. I reassessed how things were going and when she got back, I started spending some weekends to myself again to give myself a kind of self-stability and control once again.

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I agree with you with the fact that in no relationship should we place our absolute joy, we should always have appreciation for ourselves to the extent that we can feel good alone or in company.

I am glad that you were able to overcome that addictive stage of your life and found emotional stability.

Thank you very much for sharing your experience with me and for your feedback.

Greetings 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

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(Edited)

Too much attachment to one person shortens our freedom and makes us fearful and incapable of leading a life our own way since we will always be looking for the approval of the person to whom we have given control of our life.

💯% This has never and will never happen to me, but I am observant, and I see many people who do this. I'm glad that you developed the confidence to spread your wings, yet at the same time gained the wisdom to learn to evaluate friendships for yourself!

Brilliant post 🙌

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Thanks for your #KISS
I enjoyed it 😉


lips sealed

speaking lips

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I am very glad that you have never had an experience related to this aspect, the truth is very unpleasant because anything that takes away our freedom is a real tragedy.

I am very grateful that you were able to read my publication and that you left me such an uplifting comment.

Regards 🤗🤗🤗🤗

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all of us all would like to have freedom.

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That's right, that's why we must fight to obtain it.

Greetings 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

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Time and freedom is all we need on life.

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Freedom is connected with happiness because if you are not free, you won't be happy.

And if your happiness is tied to one thing or the other, once the thing is unavailable. Then sadness set in.

This is a great masterpiece, I enjoyed reading it, You are amazing

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What beautiful words 🥺 I am so glad you liked my post, I greatly appreciate your comment and it is just as you mention, everything that shortens our happiness leads us to sadness.

Greetings 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

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