Before Accusing them, try finding the reason


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Most of us would have dealt with kids in our lives. Some of us are parents and dealing with kids is our continuous task 🙃. Others deal with kids less often.

Something we all would agree is that kids sometimes display very irritating behaviour. It feels like they are stubborn without any rational reason. Their balkiness makes no sense.

Being a mother, I have witnessed several incidences when my son would behave the way of which I had no understanding as to why they would be doing what they did.

Nevertheless, over time I have got to understand that there is always a reason behind every irrational act of kids.

The thing is that they fail to explain us the reason and so we fail to understand. We just take them as obstinate.

There is a story when my son was 3 years old. My brother in law had a car. Once my husband and his brothers decided to go for a drive.

My son was with him. He refused to go on the car. Instead, he insisted that he wanted to go on the bike. The hubby tried to convince him but of no use. He started showing tantrums.

Finally, he didn’t go on the car and came back home angrily over the son’s stubbornness.

It was not a one time incident. If ever we had a choice between the car and the bike, my son would refuse to sit in the car.

I knew he didn’t like to travel in the car but I didn’t know the reason until another incident happened.

Some time later, we had an intercity travel. We were travelling in an Air Conditioner coach. After a short time of departure from our place, my son vomited.

That day I realized why my son always hated travelling in a car. He didn’t know how to explain his unusual feeling of nausea that he had sitting in the car. He just displayed his disapproval that appeared irritating.

I reminded of an incident that happened to me when I was kid.

There was some get-together in our home. Some guests were there. Bottles of soft drinks were there to serve in the feast.

I wanted to go to my mom. There was some hindrance of people in my way. In my struggle to reach her, I interacted with my uncle.

I told him I was not feeling good. Something strange was happening in my abdomen. He didn’t pay much attention but remained busy with people.

Finally, I reached my mom and told her that I had some strange feelings, sort of stomach ache. I couldn’t explain what exactly I was feeling

Meanwhile my uncle heard my complaints. He got angry and accused me that I was acting weirdly because I wanted to have some soft drink.

It was not the case but I couldn’t explain him that I was not lying about my feelings. I had no intention of drinking anything but I was feeling nausea.

Scolding me and declaring me an ill-mannered child, he angrily gave me a glass of drink.

I couldn’t even say NO to that glass. I wanted to cry over how I was accused for something I had no intention of.

The anger of my uncle left me with no choice but to pour the drink in my mouth.

I had hardly finished that small glass when the thing causing me bad feeling came out of my mouth. Yeah! I vomited.

The lesson to learn in these incidences is that kids can not explain themselves clearly most of the time. Nevertheless, they have strong feelings and emotions.

Being parents and elders, it is our duty to show empathy and compassion to them instead of accusing them of rudeness and stubbornness.

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It's really the duty of adults and parents to pay attention to their kids because a lot goes unsaid and the only way kids know how to express themselves is through tantrums.

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You are right. Some adults judge children as if they themselves were not kids before.

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It's sad, isn't it? 🫥

Thanks for stopping by

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Whenever I see parent beat their children for things like this, I try to make them understand that there is a reason why this child is behaving like this and until you patiently observe the child to know why, you will go on beating the child for no reason.

Your uncle accused you wrongly but after throwing up, he will know that you didn't fake it initially.

We need to be observant with our children, understanding every of their reactions matters a lot.

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Seriously , this post of yours made remember while I was still very small , I was trying to communicate with my parent on something but I was underrated because they felt I am a small boy which is not supposed to be

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