Greetings Hivers, welcome to the Weekly ASEAN Hive "Hot Goss", where I @justinparke dig up false ASEAN Hive rumors and spread even more, but all in satirical fun and support of Southeast Asian content on Hive.

♨️ WEEKLY ASEAN HIVE "HOT GOSS #44 🤫

🕊️ Malaysian Pigeon Racing, Aceh Banana Rockets, & Vietnamese Night Terror 👹

^{November 29th, 2022
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     MALAYSIAN PIGEON RACING will be the hottest new sport of 2023 if everything goes as planned. The newly elected government is seeking new ways to keep the population distracted from investigating government corruption and other dirty secrets.

     The initial unveiling of the pigeon racing to the public didn't go as planned, and the youth were left wondering how this new sport will be connected to TikTok. They are still working out the kinks, but if the new government is going to be popular with young voters and stand a chance at re-election in the future, they will have to accept that pigeon racing is old folks' sport if social media isn't involved.

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     Now we're off to Vietnam where a VERY UNSHAVEN FOREIGNER WANDERS THE STREETS EVERY NIGHT. Rumor has it he lost his wallet and passport many years ago, and apparently his ability to communicate.

     This man has been completely unkempt for so long that he now only bears a slight resemblance to human beings. He only goes out at night because he scares the children and street dogs too much during the day. I can't blame the locals for being scared, I mean, would you want a customer like this sitting in your bar or restaurant, or even worse, sleeping on your mattress?

---

     INDONESIA IS FINALLY READY TO OFFER BANANA ROCKETS TO UKRAINE, but Ukraine hasn't officially yet responded to this offer. So far the research and development has been kept top secret to avoid potential copycat technology reaching the market before the Indonesian banana rocket is perfected.

     At the moment, @lion-bull, the head scientist of the program, is currently trying to develop a bamboo species suitable for use as the the rocket launching tube. Once the banana and bamboo find an agreeable diameter, there is no limit to the amount of banana rockets that Indonesia could supply the world.

Until Next Time ASEAN Hivers....

     Don't forget that this curation is merely fictional satire, so don't take anything I write too seriously.

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