Wedding practices I'm not fond of. Hivenaija prompt #44.
Wedding events are usually a thing of pomp and jubilation. The wedding day is charismatically referred to by the female folk as "their happiest day". These brides go all out and spare no expense, just to make sure that they appear stunning and be the envy of all present. Even the grooms are not left out, with their sparkling designer suits and sleek hair do, all to charm the bride and get an "I do".
my friend, a bride to be
Don't mind me guys, I'm a big fan of lovers getting hoooked for life, which means that I am rarely missing at wedding events. The decor, ambience, fancy clothes and hair do of the guests plus the tantalizing aroma of party jollof or fried rice, combine to make wedding events an ideal event for me.
Before the actual wedding day, I mean the "white wedding", series of marriage procedures would have taken place. The first being the "introduction" phase, then to the "bride price payment" stage before the traditional wedding. Some couples choose to do both the white wedding and traditional on the same day, probably to save cost, while some couples choose to do theirs on separate days. It all depends on what both parties agree on.
my friend and her hubby
One of the things I'm not fond of whenever I attend these events is firstly the way the bride price payment is haggled. Some cultures set a very high amount that you would think they wanted to sell off the bride permanently. I think they forget the fact that "marriage is also a union of families as well". Most times these things are done by greedy uncles and relatives, who didn't lift a finger to assist the bride while she was growing up.
I truly wish this aspect of setting a high or fixed sum as bride price can be eradicated after all I'm of the view that no man can totally pay a father for the years, love and care spent on raising his daughter before marriage.
The second thing that I'm also not fond of is the eye service- service. It's not a mistake guys, I said itthe qay I felt it, hehe. What I mean is, after the joining of the couple, the wedding procession moves to the reception venue for some entertainment. The reception venue is also where the menu menu will be served to guests plus other souvenirs as well.
The idea of looking for familiar faces to serve food and other gifts first is improper. People left their homes, jobs and businesses just to grace your occasion, the least that could be done to show gratitude is to ensure that they are all abd well entertained.
At some wedding events, if a guest is not on the wedding attire called "aso ebi", such guests might not be entertained at all and the irony of the matter is that, there is food in abundance but the family member in charge of food distribution decides to do as she pleases.
The only time such a thing does not occur is if the couple hires a catering service to be in charge of the food without interference of family members. This way, majority of the guests are entertained with just a little number of guests left out (probably they were late)😁.
An awful experience occurred at a wedding reception ladt year December. The bride's mom was in charge of food distribution and she made it explicitly clear that any one not putting on the aso ebi" should not be served. Many guests thought it was ajoke and kept waiting but by the time an hour and a half had passed, they realized what was going on and as if on cue from a music conductor, all the guests stood and left with the gifts they had brought for the couple. The bride and her mom regretted it but it was too late, she could only bite her tongue in sorrow.....such a pity.
This is my response to the #hivenaija prompt week #44. Thank you all for reading.
Images are mine.
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Thanks
You're welcome. 🇳🇬
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Paying of bride price is normal but the bill passed by the girls parents or uncle sometimes will make you think they are selling their daughter and that is why when some men maltreat their wife's they will say stuffs like I payed for you in full, which is very bad
😂 that's true o, so true.
Thanks for your thoughts
You are welcome dear
🤗🌼
And the annoying part is after the huge bride price they will still expect help from you later... How?.. who dose that now?...
That's why I said they forget that it's a union of families. The bride's family ate usually the ones to come and extort the man in the name of seeking help.
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You have a nice article here. Caterers can be annoying too, they usually hoard food and meat for themselves. What they do is to give food without meat and then tell you the meat is finished, except you are a familiar face.
What the bride mom did was totally wrong, it very bad omen for guests to go back home with the gifts they brought for the bride.