[Week 128] Weekend-Engagement concept: The Actual-Parent Vs Foster Parent Saga

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What if you accidentally discovered you were adopted and the people you called mother and father were not your real parents. What would you do, how would it affect your life and would you seek out your real parents. Explain in at least 400 words.

I can relate to this very well because I didn't get to live with my actual parents, born into the hands of my grandma, lived with her for over 10 years and then my mum came back from travelling and settled down in our state. I stayed with her for just two years and moved in with my aunty (elder sister to my mum). I lived there till I was grown up of age and the experience there was interesting; I wasn't the only one living with her and my aunt took care of me in every way, I dint feel any difference whenever I remember my mum was not around but my aunt did all. It was no difference so far the care was there. Isn't that all we need? Care.

If I ever discovered that I was adopted, I might feel bad at first but if the care and upbringing has been god-fearing and devoid of alcohol and smoking, things that led to jail. I’m sure everyone will regret such an old comeback parent. But if proper care is taken, I might not even look at the new parent's face. Properly.

How will it affect my life?
It won't, for many grown-up adults, the discovery of one's legitimacy can and won't change anything as against popular belief as we see in movies. No way. If you are my father and you left me for whatever reason best known to you, if I've lived my life after +30 years and you expect to burst out of nowhere to claim me, no way are you ever going to get me. I think life gets affected if the legitimacy claim comes in at an earlier age when the child hasn’t formed yet and an impact could still be made or felt. There is no use of a legitimacy claim at an adult age, it does no party any good, either from the actual parent or the child, the best is to know and just let the child be.

Would you seek your actual parents?
At my age, +30, no, I won't, but I might be an older age just for the fun of it, I believe I'm already grown and I owe my allegiance to my foster parent, to take care of them and leave the story that might have lead to my separation out of the picture, maybe in years to comes, revisit and just know the father for the sake of it. It all boils down to perception, I believe.

I see lots of people look for their actual parents online by providing the little information they could if anyone could help them get it. Many of these people are adults, grown adults, for me, seeing no need; I believe it’s destiny; I believe there will continue to be foster parents, either intentionally or not.