Dick and Jane celebrate National Law Enforcement Appreciation Day

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See Dick.

See Dick, Jane.

Look at Dick.

Look, look at Dick, Jane.

Oh, oh.


Dick has a sharpie.

Oh, oh.

See Dick draw.

Look, Jane!

Dick is drawing with a sharpie.

Oh, oh!





See Dick draw with a sharpie.
See Dick draw sharpie drawings.
Look, Jane!
Dick is drawing sharpie drawings.
Oh, oh!

See Dick mint.
Dick is minting an NFT.
Mint, Dick, mint.
Oh, oh, oh!
Dick minted an NFT.
Dick is an NFT artist.



Dick is rich.

Dick is a rich artist.

Look, Jane!

Dick is a rich NFT artist!


Look at Dick the rich NFT artist.

Dick has crypto.

Dick is crypto rich.

Oh, oh.

Dick has a lot of crypto!





Look, Jane.
Crypto made Dick rich.
America hates crypto.
America made laws against crypto.
Dick has a lot of crypto in America.
Dick is an American criminal.
Oh, oh!


Look at Dick.
Dick has lots of crypto.
Dick is in lots of trouble.
Dick is in trouble in America.
Dick is in trouble with the law.
Oh, oh, oh!




See Dick.

See Dick run.

Run, Dick, run!

Dick is running from the law.

Dick is an outlaw.

Run from the law, Dick the Outlaw!



Look, Dick. Look, look. Look at Spot. See Spot the cop dog. Spot is a cop dog! Run, Dick, run! Run from Spot the cop dog!



Look, Jane.

Look at Dick the Outlaw.

Dick the Outlaw is in trouble!

Dick is running from Spot the cop dog.

Help Dick, Jane.

Help Dick get away from Spot.

Help Dick the Outlaw get out of trouble!



Look, Jane. Dick needs a pistol.

Dick needs a pistol quick. Quick, Jane, quick!

3D-print a pistol for Dick! Give Dick the pistol you printed, quick!



Shoot, Dick!

Shoot, Dick, shoot!

Shoot Spot the cop dog!



Look, Jane, look!

Dick shot Spot the cop dog!

Dick the Outlaw shot Spot with the pistol you printed!



What, Jane!

What, Jane, what!

What have you done, Jane!



See Jane.

See what Jane has done.

Jane helped an outlaw run from the law.

Jane is in trouble with the law!

Jane is in trouble in America!



Flee, Dick and Jane, flee!

Flee the country!

Run before the cops come!

Run away before they come put you in a cage!

Run away, Dick and Jane, run away!



Dick and Jane are outlaws!




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🖕 👮‍♀

※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※


1-9-22. Happy National Law Enforcement Appreciation Day and thanks for reading my Dick and Jane story. The six accompanying graphics are from an NFT collection called "Mazes Against the State" which I created a year ago in an attempt to redirect my rage against the American police state's systemic racism, corruption, injustice, and brutality into something nonviolently productive. LEAD seemed like an appropriate day to revisit it and out myself as the brain-damaged mind behind it especially since nobody noticed the first time around. Original post is here. Proof that I control this wallet can be seen here; if you want additional confirmation that I'm not just stealing someone else's work please reach out on Discord: brandt#1284



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54 comments
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Happy Lead Day! First I thought WTF but then it grew on me. Spot's spot on 👍

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It's different than what I usually publish here, but it needed to go somewhere, so here it is :) Rest in peace Spot.

!PIZZA

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(Edited)

@coloneljethro just did a big ol' huge spread on Dicks headstone.

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Yeah I saw that. Those Dicks are dead though; this Dick is hopefully still alive and on the run.

!PIZZA

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Oh the tombstone's a decoy. Smooth moves, Dick.

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See Dick.
See Dick move smoothly.
Move smoothly, Dick, move smoothly!
Oh, oh.

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Dicks are popular, never dick around about Dicks.

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I totally envy sports commentators whose co-host is named Dick because they get to say things like "down to the wire, Dick" all the time on live TV.

Back to you, Dick!

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😂

How about this one? I knew a guy for years whose name was Dick Man. No I'm not kidding. He's say just call me "Dick" that came out in the same breath with a chuckle. He was a decent guy, never was a dick but definitely a Dick.

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(Edited)

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That’s a Dickload of Dick Drawings, not even Dicknifying, not like @dandays (why not dickdays, you coulda been NFT criminal rich in ‘merika).

Was that dog that Dick saw, was that a German Shepherd dog? Should I even ask that in public? Is it safe to ask a dog’s breed? Not mentioning gender here since Dick shot Dog.

Give Dick the pistol you printed, quick!

I read this as “Dive Gick the distol you drinted, Dick!”

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Yes, Spot was a German Shepherd K9 unit, and Dick shot and killed him with a 3D-printed pistol. Diss Grint Pisser a drint or git quicktrol.

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😂

quicktrol.

Sounds like alcohol, but quicker.

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Quicktrol®
No other liquor could lick you so quick®

That's trademarked. Patent pending. Registered et cetera. I have lawyers.

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Okay, those registered marks scare the crap out of me. I'm not even going to quote that, might be a copy pasta issue pending, upcoming registering, etceteraing, and heaven flamethrower drone blowers, lawyers...no no no Tom Sawyer.

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LEAD seemed like an appropriate day

I know nothing of this day, must be because I'm Canadian.

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My guess is they probably have a similar day in Canadia but if so I know nothing of it.

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That makes two of us and since I mashed all days into just days with no particular note to any of them, I still know nothing.

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That's a nice Dick Jane.

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Thanks!
It's really nice.
It's a really nice Dick.
Oh, oh.

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See Dick?
See Dick fun.
Jane likes fun Dick.
Oh, oh.

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Look, Jane.
Look at fun Dick.
See how nice and funny Dick is.
Oh, oh.

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Jane sees Dick.
Dick comes closer.
Now Dick looks bigger.
Oh, oh.

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Look, Jane.
See bigger Dick.
See bigger Dick look nice and fun.
Oh, oh.

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Dick has Spot.
Jane sees Spot.
Oh, oh.

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Look, Jane.
Dick has spots.
Dick has spots in places where you aught not have spots.
Oh, oh.

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Dick denied.
Jane has cried.
Spot has ruined Dick's pride.
Oh, oh.

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Comming soon to the new and improved Ladybird Key Words range ™️ Previous works by the author include the renowned scientific research paper on human nature. @Brandt educating early readers in a modern era.

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Education is important, you know!

:)

!PIZZA

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I love your Mazes Against the State. And I love Dick, Jane and Spot. Although Jane and Dick are new to me. I started leaning English when I was ten with Jack, Jill (siblings) and Spot the dog. And that's long ago so Spot had a really long life for a dog. Good to know that his death was quick and that he didn't suffer.

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I bet Jack and Jill are Dick and Jane's cousins. Funny that they gave their dogs the same name.

!PIZZA

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If that's the only dog name in English you can give to a dog that has spots because for instance Sarah or Kevin simply won't do. Those names are reserved for dogs who have Sarah or Kevin lookalike figures in their fur. I would imagine many dogs should be named Jesus.

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Jesus would make a great sheepdog I bet.

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Oh the pressure he would have being the best sheepdog ever.

"Jesus! Stop licking your butt and then my face. No I'm not giving you any more water because we all know how that turns out."

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Sounds like someone needs to turn Jesus the Sheepdog into a children's book series :)

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Does it need to have a happy ending?

Someone? Soooomeeeeooooneeeee?
Someone isn't here.

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I guess Jesus the Sheepdog should probably die at the end of every book. Then he can just come back from the dead for the next :)

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Yay! 🤗
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Thanks for the boosty boost @nineclaws!

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You're welcome @brandt. Dick deserved it. Forget Jane.

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Plot twist: Dick ditches Jane somewhere in Mexico to save his own skin.

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Bye bye Jane in the ditch, Dick needs to save his britches!

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I've just checked your nftshowroom profile (great series! I didn't know you're an art maker too!) and I was wondering why your works are not for sale? Dick can't get crypto rich if he doesn't sell his artworks to even richer crypto people!

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They were for sale for a while but I delisted them before publishing this article. I decided I liked them. Maybe I will re-list again later, who knows, I am a very lazy and unmotivated artist 🤷‍♂

Glad you liked the series, more to come, maybe, if I feel like it…

!PIZZA

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No Jane, no.
Do not look at Spot, Jane.
Spot is resting.
Rest, Spot, rest.
Rest in peace, Spot.

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See Spot.
Spot is napping.
Nap, Spot, nap.
Spot is napping forever.

!PIZZA

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No, Dick, no.
Spot is up.
Spot is mad.
Spot is undead.

Watch out, Dick!
Oh no!
Jane tripped Dick.
Dick fell down.
Dick stayed down.
Jane ran away.

Run Jane run!

Alternate ending. For the record, you seeded zombies in my head on that other thread...

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lol I like it. Run the presses!

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