The Struggle With My Emotional Baggage And Balancing My Life
Hello Everyone, and welcome to my blog. This is my first time posting here although I have always had plans to post in the community but I usually forgot until today.
Most persons who do not know me, always say I am too rigid and don't think I know how to love but the truth is I am more emotional than one can think, I fall in love real quick and get really messed up emotionally faster than one can imagine but then, these people don't know this because over the years, with the awful experiences have I been through, I have learned to mask my touche emotions physically and built a wall around my heart that makes it takes time for anyone to penetrate without my permission.
This week's question reminds me of this particular slang we often say in my country to describe an emotional pain one is going through "Everybody go collect this breakfast".
Now, the slang means that at one point in our lives, every one of us will go through emotional pain or relationship failure. Whether intimately or casually, we will all go through emotional pains and this is me indirectly also saying that I have had a test of emotional pains and it baggages and I must confess that it is a bitter experience.
Indeed, emotional baggage makes one a prisoner of our past hindering us from seeing the bright light shining ahead of us as a result of the hurt we encountered from the people we trusted.
Regardless of the baggage, we are carrying, I still do believe that there are still a lot of good people out there, and a lot of good things and the good life we are yet to see and experience as a result of the baggage we have refused to let go and face life squarely.
I remember a few weeks ago, I was asked by a friend why I was afraid of getting into a relationship, getting married, or becoming emotionally attached to someone, and here was my sincere answer, " That I was afraid". Afraid that I won't be good enough, afraid of getting hurt again, afraid of loving someone so deeply only to realize that the person doesn't love me as much as I do.
As much as I would love to be emotionally loved by someone, I mean who doesn't want to be, I still do know that I do have a lot of emotional baggage weighing me down as a result of my past experiences which have made me a
prisoner of my past and this has built up fear, lack of self-worth, and self-doubt about myself and the future.
This problem has made me build a wall around myself in a bid to protect myself from people refusing to give people a chance so I do not get hurt again and as a result, obstructed me from seeing the beautiful things life has got for me.
Although trying to work on myself daily because of the advice of people but I can sincerely say that I still have some emotional baggage weighing me down, I still have regrets that I often dwell on and past I wished I never had or wished I was able to correct as they most times hunt my present.
Although not really over these things but there are a few ways wish I have been working on to try and help let go of this emotional baggage, so I can see from the right perspective.
- Accepting my past and my mistakes
- Forgiving myself and whoever is responsible
- Breaking down my walls
- Being open to changes and the beautiful things life presents to us or will give us.
- Living for today and allowing tomorrow to worry for itself
- Loving yourself better and focusing on improving your self-worth and value.
- Do what makes you happy and get to treat yourself more often. Travel, go out, just anything.
And lastly, learn to talk to trusted people about how you feel because it helps reduce the weight you are carrying.
I invite @merit.ahama to participate in this week's question.