Toxic And Miserable

They say time flies when you are having fun so I guess I am having a terrible time lately. With my wife stuck in hospital and her manager from work also in hospital (Gall stones).I am covering for them right now and it is not a choice I had to make as this is the only one.

Businesses are built around their staff and when situations like this arise it shows how vulnerable you actually are. I don't blame the other staff they have as they just don't have the experience to step up. I know this company like the back of my hand as it is part of our family being my brother in laws.

In my wildest dreams I never thought I would be back there as I have to be honest I out grew it and just lost any passion I had for the place. I have moved on and don't see eye to eye with some of the people as I believe they are toxic. It only took me 5 minutes to have my first altercation and knew it was time to bite my tongue as this is just temporary. I think some of it is down to jealousies as it can be nothing else. Maybe they expected to be running the show and were shocked to see me suddenly arrive. I am sure the atmosphere changed rather quickly with many curses aimed at me. I don't give two fucks though as there is a job to be done.

Little do they know I wish they were capable and trust worthy enough to do a decent job because they would be welcome to it. When I was working there I am not someone to have a title as it really means nothing. I was offered to run the place which I was already doing yet I said because of the family connection give it to someone not connected. My thinking is why would anyone push themselves if they knew their job was a dead end. Give chances to people that deserve it and who would appreciate a title and a pat on the back.

Normally someone would jump at a promotion and more money, but I felt that this was the right move. Maybe I am too nice and should just say stuff them I will have it. I treated it as though it was my company anyway as that is what family does. If I needed more money I would just ask so it wasn't down to that side of things, but the morale of the work place. Everyone has to get on with each other and for me that was far more important.

Unfortunately due to some underhand circumstances by some of the companies they were involved in they had to retrench many staff including the person I asked to take my role. The people that were left behind were the bare minimum required yet it seems they haven't grown work wise and maybe it was a big mistake to keep them on.

When you are new to a company which I kind of am again laying fresh eyes on something I already know it makes you think. I have been back a few days and already I can see things that need changing ,but it is not my place to get involved. As hard as it maybe to do you have to remember that you are not part of it and detach yourself otherwise you will just get caught up in it again. This job nearly sent me to an early grave and was one of the reasons I walked away. Health is more important and I am not surprised that the two who are running the show are both in hospital right now.

Stress and work related issues being totally engrossed is not having a life and no job is worth that at the end of the day. That is why I decided to move on and do my own thing with no staff involved,but just good old me. I smile every day these days as I enjoy every moment and I haven't see a smile in the last two days with this bunch.This is just too toxic and I am hoping by next week I am back out again. the one good thing is I will leave suggestions that I would recommend with certain staff members packing their bags.