I often have this exchange with my son.

Son: "I'll try my best."
Me: "No, you don't 'try', you 'do': you'll do your best."

I'm sure for many of you the first thing that pops into your mind upon reading that exchange is Yoda's famous quote, "Do or do not; there is no try."

Incidentally, since I'm always going for a Japan angle on this blog, the line in the Japanese version of Star Wars is やるか、やらぬかだ。試しなど要らん (yaru ka, yaranu ka da; tameshi nado iran), which is a little different, but carries the same basic idea.

Stop trying to hit me and hit me!

(I don't have the video for this one, but this site (which is in Japanese) tells me it is 打とうとするんじゃなくて、本当に打て, utō tosurun janakute, honto ni ute, which seems to be pretty close)

So, what's it mean?

The dictionary defines try as making an attempt. That by itself seems positive, but I think the thing about the word try is it often carries the feeling of not believing you can succeed (doubting yourself) and therefore giving a pre-excuse for your failure.

I'll try it! (I don't really think I can do it, so don't get mad at me when I fail)

It suggests a half-hearted effort and giving up before you even do it. It shows a pessimistic outlook. It says you have already accepted failure.

Do you try to walk? Do you try to breath? No, because you know you can do these things. You need to take that same certainty of success into everything you do (not try).

Using the word do instead of try puts us in the mindset of believing we can. That belief in our success is something all that is needed to push us over the hump.

I'll do it! (I believe I am good enough to be successful)

That's the feeling anyway, and I think why the Yoda quote sticks with us. It is positive; it is motivational; it is powerful.

I always tell my son:

Never "try". You'll do your best. If you fail, that's ok. Failure is a good teacher and shows us where and how we need to improve, so it is ok to fail. That said, you don't consider that when you do it. You believe that you can and you believe you will always be successful. You'll do it and do it to the best of your ability.

The words we use are important. Even if you personally mean "I believe I can and will give it 100% effort" when you use the word try, if you grew up in an English speaking country you are aware of the less-positive connotations of the word and these may affect your thinking subconsciously.

This is why we try to use positive words: not in some silly effort to somehow magically alter things or influence the universe (the so-called "Law of Attraction"), but rather to make sure we are not influencing our brain in unwanted ways. Call it self-programming if you wish. The mind is like a sponge and soaks up everything we give it, good or bad, so if you want good things to come out, good things need to go in: you need to keep what you tell yourself as positive as possible.

The metaphor of a garden comes to mind. Careless planting and lack of tending will result in an overgrown and unorganized garden, whereas careful planting and tending will result in a space that rewards you with great crops and beautiful flowers. You reap what you sow, in other words, and this is truest of all with ourselves.

Sorry, I didn't mean to get all motivational speaker there. In general I don't like a lot of motivational speakers because they seem to encourage magical thinking instead of actual self-improvement. The power of positive thinking is how it influences our actions, not how it might somehow influence the universe to give us better luck. But of course clinging to magical thinking is easier than changing ourselves, so motivational speakers get a lot more money when they cater to these beliefs. Call this the Wayne Dyer effect.

(Wayne Dyer started his career as a motivational speaker giving real, solid advice about how we can improve our thinking, but by the end of his career he was off in Lala land, spending almost all his time talking about how we can get the universe to grant our wishes.)

But these things do seem to naturally come when you become a parent and are trying to help your kids succeed, and so it is what I end up thinking and trying to tell my kids.

Anyway, I urge you to make an effort to replace "try" with "do" in your own life. It's a small change and fairly easy to do, and will help add a bit of positive thinking to your life.

David LaSpina is an American photographer and translator lost in Japan, trying to capture the beauty of this country one photo at a time and searching for the perfect haiku.

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