KISS Week #62 - The Balance I Create

I think I may have blogged about this at some point in my life here on Hive. But looking at the prompt again, I am left to wonder if something might have changed between now and then.

Stress is something we experience daily; emotional, mental, financial and maybe even spiritual. I don't think there isn't a person who isn't stressing about one thing or the other. Stress is like a monumental butthole in your latte. Disgustingly annoying.

However, I'd like to think that this stress is brought about by situations that do need our attention. Things we should do and solve and not just overlook. I say, if many of us had our way, we'd constantly be running away from problems. But running away can be good sometimes. There is something my favorite artist said and it is along the lines of,

"Some would say having a mental breakdown is a negative thing
Which on one hand, I agree with
On the other hand, it was the push I needed
To get help and start the healing process, see
If I'd have never hit rock bottom
Would I be the person that I am today?"

I have days when I'm hit all at once by stuffs happening in my life. These days can be so unbelievably painful because these are my fears taking a hold of me. These are days when the doubts are piling over themselves and I get that stupid itch under my skin. There are days when the writing feels like a chore and meeting with other people is just punishment. There are days when I just want the world away from me.

But even so, should I forget that there are people who need me too? That there are things I must attend to? That I have responsibilties ahead? Dreams and visions that need me to work constantly? No. I shouldn't. I don't. And that is why I end up torn into two separate places; my mind and body at war.

Yet, I do have to make a decision. The one great thing about life (or mine) is that I have the choice. My stress are mostly internal. I have to deal with the fight inside me most days than the daily life struggle which is nothing in my opinion compared to those moments alone when the voices get loud.

Last week was one of such times except it manifested physically. I came down with (as Tengo doctor called it) sinus infection (don't know what it is with writer men and using big words). It is just a cold for those who may be wondering. My nose was so incredibly swollen I must have looked like Chun Li or Rudolph (except without the shine).

When the symptoms happened, I did what I always do. I took a break. Unlike what many assume, taking breaks does not mean laziness. To me, it means that the individual has a pretty good knowledge of his/her breaking points.

During this period of sickness (which began from Tuesday night), the only time I left the house or my bed was to go for exam which ultimately did more harm too. I stayed away from Hive and the world generally and did something I haven't done in a long time. Watch TV. Not just any TV. I watched K-Drama. The humor in it was exactly what I needed.

When @jhymi had come to me with the same problem, I gave her my genuine advice. She wasn't doing well mentally and I suggested she took time off which she did. I hope she's feeling a lot better now. There are days we just let the body win. I know we are torn because we have responsibilities, dreams and aspirations that laying around would not help us reach. Worse, many of us suffer from Imposter Syndrome and this just drives us to the brink.

However, I am learning that I must make time for myself too and heal. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically too. I achieve this by:

• Reading a good book (sometimes novels other times a good self-development one).

• Crying and sharing with someone. Unlike what many believe, crying isn't a sign of weakness. If those tears come, I let them flow. I mean, I always feel lighter when I cry. A very wise woman (@dreemsteem) told me once that it is good to cry. I have never looked at crying the same after that. I also noticed that I have been crying less and less due to stress (unless it's ovulation and my lady dragon just wants to mess with me).

• I take up my Bible. One thing I have learned is that guilt just drives you away from your core. When I encounter days like this, I'm always pushed to my altar. I still do it. Not often but there is a peace that hits my soul when I repeat the words (evergreen) from that book. I listen to soulful music, feeding my spirit because sometimes, your stress levels are a symbol of a sick spirit.

• I rest, exercise and eat. I may not be very energetic to hit the gym but I go on walks. Long walks and then come home and sleep. I may take a two-hour nap if I really need it. And eating well.

That's all! It is how I ease stress and keep balance in my life. Very simple and easy to emulate. But we all have different systems. I'd like to know yours.

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