Image

In a world full of cruelty and disharmony, a life full of chaos and uncertainties, nothing keeps me going but the little gestures of love which makes me happy. A million little thoughtful things does make my heart bubble with happiness and they include:

Instilling knowledge in young minds: I am a teacher and I wouldn't have asked for any other profession. I feel very happy each time my students understand the lessons and have great results. It fills my heart with so much joy to have parents give me good feedbacks of how their kids are much better compared to how they used to be before.

Good Food : I have a strong believe that oftentimes, the major cause of unhappiness is hunger. It may seem funny but there is something I do. Each time I don't feel good or I'm upset about something, I treat myself to a good meal and I feel 50% better all the time. There's a slang we popular say in Nigeria "problem e no dey finish, try dey enjoy / try dey chop" and it means problem never ceases, try and enjoy / try and eat.

Compliments : Compliments mean more to me than just words of praise. They go a long way. First, apart from the smile it puts on my face, it encourages me to do even better. Also, for me, I get to know if I'm doing something well when I'm being complimented. Does that imply that I seek validation from people? No! I just believe there's no way you do something good that at least one person won't say "hey Didiee, that was a good presentation or hey, you look lovely today". Even if people never get to say this out to you, you can always tell by the look on their faces.

Little sacrifices made for me do make me happy . It's only out of love that someone else can let go of something they need as well just so you can have it because they feel you need it much more. Be it a meal, a little money, a seat, a spot on the queue, whatever little act of sacrifice makes me happy.

Gifts I didn't request for makes me happy as well . One day I was home and I didn't have a very good day. Out of the blue I got a credit alert with the description "for data". Next, I got a text from my friend telling me he sent me some money to buy data and learn a skill online while the strike is ongoing. I was both surprised and very happy. That was a very thoughtful thing to do. Those of us who work online can tell just how much we spend on data bundles only. I also always feel that every gift no matter what form it takes is a sign that someone thought of you and decided to do something to make you happy and tell you that they have your interest at heart.

A phone call to say "how's that baking class you took up going for you?" I have a different kind of love for people who remember something I told them I want to do or I've just started doing and checks up to see how it's going. It's not easy for anyone to still remember your affairs despite their busy schedule so when I meet people who do, I feel very happy about the act and the fact that they are a part of my life.

Acts of service does make me happy too. I'm not someone who quickly asks for help. I'm very fond of doing everything on my own because it's the only life I've been used to while growing up but over the years I've come in contact with people who are just genuinely helpful. I mention something I may be confused about, next I am sent an article that explains everything I need to know about that topic. Any little thing someone does to ease my work be it doing the dishes, reviewing my writing, folding clothes, as long as it's to assist me, this is certainly something that makes me happy.

Being recommended to do something whether I'll be paid for it or not makes me happy. This shows that someone trusts me and believes I'm the best person to handle a particular task. That's why I was recommended and this is a good thing for me.
These are just a few simple things that make me happy.

On how I maintain inner peace without allowing external factors influence me…

I want to put it that having peace is a personal decision just as happiness is. Someone might have the above mentioned things done for them and not be happy and that's simply because he/she has chosen not to be and just as Eckhart Tolle had said, you find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the deepest level. Peace comes with knowing who you are, what you represent and what you want.

The ultimate way I maintain peace is to stick to being myself unapologetically. Regardless of what people say, regardless of circumstances, regardless of how someone else decides to paint me. I know what I am and what I'm worth and I keep being me, this is how I maintain my peace.

When I'm faced with a really difficult problem, one of those moments when everything is going sideways, the first thing I do is to take deep breaths and practice calmness. People underestimate this technique. No one got a problem solved by worrying so I just try as much as possible to stay calm and try to go about whatever problem it is carefully.

I also do well to ignore a lot of things. I don't think anyone can have inner peace if they react to every single thing. Someone upsets you - you yell, someone verbally abuses you - you abuse right back, someone tears your dress in a fight - you naked them, someone drags you online - you respond. Not everything needs a reaction. You'll be amazed at how many battles you'll win by just staying silent. It doesn't mean that I let people get away with anything they do to me but I only respond to things if they are of great importance.

I try to stay in control of my emotions at all times. You can never be at peace if you allow people, events or circumstances determine how you feel.

On how I achieve happiness...

Like I said earlier on, happiness I believe is a choice and as Aristotle puts it "Happiness depends upon ourselves." Personally, I achieve happiness by thinking positively everytime and living in the moment rather than overthinking. I always have tons of positive lessons to make out of circumstances. That's how I get over sad situations, I look at the bright side of things. Rather than worry about what could happen, I focus on what is.

Image

I learn to appreciate the little things in my life - friends, family, work, little progress, ability to breathe, every single thing that's going right for me is a source of happiness and worth being grateful for.

I surround myself with happy people too. People often underestimate the power of influence. I hear a lot of people say they are never easily influenced, that's possible but you can be influenced. I'm very careful of who is in my corner, who I let into my space. If you're not what I want, you don't represent the things I stand for then you shouldn't be around me a lot. Surrounding myself with happy people helps me achieve happiness as well.

I set goals for myself and work towards them. Every milestone I reach is a reason to be happy and challenge myself to do much more. Reflecting on my journey helps me stay grateful and happy.

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony" says Mahatma Gandhi. This summarizes how I achieve happiness, I think, I voice out my thought and put them into practice and I'm happy.

Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.
-WAYNE W. DYER
In summary, I hope we begin to process life as it is and I also hope we find reasons to be happy despite all the troubles life brings us.