Charity begins at home

I am sure when the adage Charity begins at home was coined, it was directly pointing to the home, family, and children most especially because a child's life begins from his or her home.

It is so disheartening to watch kids become something unspeakable even in the presence of their parents and not fear what would be the outcome of such actions and parents who feel sparing the rod and spoiling the child is a way of showing and telling their kids they love them has done more harm to themselves than to the society.

A few days ago, I was with a girlfriend of mine and decided to get a few things from the shop down her street. While she was buying what she needed, I noticed the seller's attitude towards her customer and particularly to a boy who refused to answer her because of the words she was saying.

I wasn't comfortable for my kind of person and when we left, I asked myself why the seller was behaving that way, there my friend said that's how she talks to people and that one of the days she went to get something, an elderly woman came reporting about the way her daughter spoke to her and how she doesn't like it and should caution her daughter on her to talk to people but the woman bluntly denied that her daughter would never say or act the way the woman said.

Funny enough two other people who came to get something also attested to the woman's claim that the seller's daughter is very abusive and should be cautioned by her mother but the seller still insisted that her daughter would never do such a thing or say such things saying "She knows her daughter".

I don't know the daughter and never saw the daughter but judging from what I saw and what my friend told me, I was already believing that her daughter did what they accused her of doing because there is also an adage that says," Show me your friend, and I will tell you who you are, Birds of a feather flocks together". I hope I don't need to go into that adage to explain to us what that means but to summarize it all, the daughter is a photocopy of who her mother is.

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Mango fruit can never fall far from its tree and so is it with children. Children are products of what they see, hear, and feel in their homes. A Child's first school is his or her home and if a parent does not deem it fit to train his or her child properly then he or she should not come out and point hands at society, the teachers, or friends.

Teach your children respect, show them what respect means, and watch them portray respect both in and out of the home. I tell people when I respect you, it doesn't mean I fear you. Respect and fear are two different things and should be acted upon accordingly.

Teach the kids what they need to know and in the right way, no child is too small to hear or see, they understand everything you say, hear everything you speak and see everything you do. Correct them, rebuke them, discipline them, teach them all with love and watch them grow into good people.

The second scene around my home got me writing this today, I was indoors when I heard a commotion going on outside my house and I decided to check what was going on, then I heard a mother tell another mother, "Why should you beat my child, do you know the pains I went through to deliver this child"

Hmmm, seriously? A child was beaten for bad behaviour, for insulting his elderly one and his mother stood up to fight for such course? What on earth is going on, why should mothers think or feel giving birth to a child is all there is to be called a mother?

Being a mother is beyond just giving birth, why then would you let your child not be disciplined for what is not right because you pushed hard or went through a cesarian section or process to give birth to the child which is more reason you should discipline the child and not pamper the child for the offense he committed.

The argument between these two women went on for a long time, and the mother of the child still saw no bad in what her child did. I could not help but go back into my room and lock my door because I had no intention of going out no matter what happens but I was sure and I have made up my mind that any time that child crosses my path with such attitude, I was going to deal with him although I am sure such incident will never happen since I rarely talk to these kids.

Have we not noticed that society instead of getting better is becoming worst than it was daily and that is because some parents have refused to pay the price in their homes before letting those children flock around the street harming innocent people because of bad parenting.

Now, my question is, is this how we are going to train our kids so they will become leaders of tomorrow?

What will become of our tomorrow, if this continues?

Now, this is my advice to all aspiring parents including myself, let's learn to teach our kids good characters so they don't become a thorn in the flesh to others and we don't end up looking for who to blame when they turn into rascals.

Don't wait till when they start going to school, the teacher will never do the job of a parent, she does the job of a teacher. Nobody can do the job of parenting better than you do, nobody will train your child better, so don't leave the job for your maid, the teachers in school, private tutor, or perhaps one partner.

Speak to them, speak into their lives, nurture them and watch them grow with love.