Respect

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(Edited)
When I was in Navy boot camp, there was a really decent officer that I'll never forget. He was considerate and kind, always looking out for the recruits in his care. So you're thinking, ok, great, but why am I writing about him? He was one of a string of people that got absolutely no respect. Part of the reason was his name. It was literally: Charlie Brown. Not Charles, but Charlie.

I don't know what drugs they were on when his parents decided to name him after that luckless cartoon character, but his moniker caused problems throughout his entire life. During roll call, only myself and a handful of others would snap to attention when he'd enter the room. This was required, but the guys openly disregarded the rule whenever he was around and mocked his name to his face. They showed no respect to him at all.



Now, I'm one of those guys who will speak up, and went around asking my fellow recruits why they were behaving this way. Officer Brown had replaced a real asshole, and was trying to give the recruits a respite from the Hitler-type who held the position before him. But his name and almost too-kind demeanor always got in the way. The kids just didn't care for the most part, and seemed to disrespect him as a way of empowering themselves. I warned them time and again that they would come to regret how they treated him, and then it happened...

Word got back to the upper command, and one day a senior officer stood in the shadows and watched him conduct morning roll call. It was a fiasco. The were laughing and horseplaying around, while calling him every name imaginable. Suddenly, out of the background the senior officer loudly announced himself causing the startled plebes to instantly stand at attention. We were all upbraided for not obeying officer Brown and the entire company was punished. He did point out me and the rest of the small group that had shown him respect, but we all had to pay the price.



So you're thinking now the guys learned their lesson, right? Wrong. Twice more the senior officer interrupted their bad behavior and then the hammer came down quickly. Officer Brown was demoted and replaced by the Hitler-like sadist that preceded him. Did he restore discipline? you bet! Did the guys like it? Not a bit. The whining about the mean officer resumed and I told them they were getting exactly the type of officer they deserved.

No regard for the nice guy

I've seen this scenario play out repeatedly ever since. People acting against their own interests when dealing with someone that actually cares about them. After boot camp, the disrespect I saw caused me to label that type of behavior as someone being "Charlie Browned." I worked at a Mexican restaurant and we had a manager named Jim. This dude was so good to everyone. Jim looked out for the underdog and always had your back when you deserved it. But I saw early on that he was being "Charlie Browned."

I actually spoke to the staff about it, and this time it wasn't a name that ignited it, just his kind nature. Everyone was told about what happened in the Navy, and warned that if they didn't shape up, we'd end up losing him as well. I sat down and spoke to Jim as well, and he told me that it was just his nature to be considerate and he couldn't be anything other than what he was. Again, myself and a small group always showed Jim respect, but just as in the Navy, the hammer eventually came down hard.

Management started noticing the loose attitude when Jim was on duty and began making moves against him. He decided to crack down too late, when he saw the boot coming. At that point they'd gotten away with dissing him for so long, that many disregarded his belated effort to restore order. Management had a tactic at the time where instead of firing a manager in his home store, they'd transfer him to another one where they ended up doing the dirty deed. There were about six of us that always showed him respect, and we had a party for him on his last day, without a dry eye among us.

Just as in the Navy, Jim was replaced by Joe who was the personification of pure evil. Joe would remain the kitchen manager until the place closed down, and total terror rained down on a daily basis. We lost a ton of good people during his tenure and two months after his hiring, we learned that Jim had been fired.

Lessons

Now, I share these two accounts as they represent what I've seen happen over and over no matter where I am. Good, kind, decent, considerate people are usually run over by the crowd. Often, people get the management they deserve. However, its the small group who behaved respectfully, that I feel for the most. They see the peril in what's happening, but their entreaties to the nice guy to crack down are rebuffed time and again.

Nice guys need to toughen up and parcel their kindness out to those that truly deserve it. The Hitler-types need to realize that the boomerang they're tossing will come around and hit them as well. Workers need to see that they have something to lose when they decide to "Charlie Brown" someone with a good heart. We all need to find that middle ground where we balance discipline with respect. There are too many consequences otherwise.

One wonders when we'll start showing respect to those that deserve it. The other issue is why these good folks can't see the danger they're in until its too late. it's like watching the same old movie repeat itself. The good guy is always too kind and gets no respect. He's replaced by the Hitler, who goes too far in the other direction and runs the good people out. Then finally, he's replaced by someone in the middle, and sanity is restored. What kind of memorable bosses have you had in your work life? Let us know in a comment below.

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5 comments
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A good post that you can discuss and draw conclusions, in a word, the post is vital and interesting. I do not like to remember the time of my service in the Army. I consider this time wasted and useless. In addition to hellish psychological and physical stress, I have never seen anything else in the army. If I could go back in time, I would have done a lot to avoid serving in the army. I served in the army during the Soviet era, I mean the Soviet Union. Now we live in the independent country of Ukraine. Perhaps the army is completely different now. Thank you so much for your attention and support. Good mood and good health to you. 🙏

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That's interesting as I know and respect the sacrifice people make to serve their country in the military. I wrote this post because I see so much misbehavior towards decent people nowadays. Parents need to think twice before deciding to name their kids after a cartoon character. These unusual names may haunt the child throughout life. I hope you find decency in you daily walk as well. I don't know if you're familiar with a famous YouTube streamer from your country known as MustangWanted. I hope he lives a long life, but I'm fearful when seeing pictures of him. He's well known for climbing tall buildings and structures, and is much braver than I would be! :)


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Thank you very much for responding to my comment. Of course, in the army that I served, there were also funny and amazing happenings. Life is good because you have to see and hear a lot of different things. I really like the way you express your thoughts in a letter, you are interesting to read. I want to thank you again.

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It's a true thing indeed. If you are unilaterally kind and good natured, life's c*unts will take utter advantage!

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(Edited)

Yes, but you know what? Each time they paid a price. The disrespect was to their disadvantage as well, as the good guy was always replaced by someone who ended up being bad for them. Some never learn. I'm glad that my cohort always treated them with respect.

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