Let Us Start Thinking With Our Hearts

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When you meet people for the first time, or people in a long time, avoid asking them personal questions about their marriage, children or very sensitive issues.
Let them be the one to bring it up. You don’t know if they’re married, they’re going through a divorce or a job loss or something terrible. Life happens to every one of us.

Many people are going through a lot and don’t like to be reminded of their worries.
If they didn’t bring it up to you, ask for your opinion or bring it to your notice, keep your mouth or concern away.
Also avoid telling people they’ve grown fat or too thin if they didn’t ask for your opinion.

Many people are going through issues which have affected their weight and it’s very insensitive of you to remind them of it in a bid to exchange pleasantries.
Don't tell people you think they should have another child even if you've noticed their last child is of age. Women go through difficult pregnancies and take time to rest. Many women have miscarriages, which they don't like to share. Don't be the
reason another human would shed tears. Don't be a horrible and an insensitive person!

In similar vein, avoid telling a mother that her child should have started crawling or walking at whatever age. If your child achieved a milestone at a particular age, this doesn’t mean another child would achieve same. Even children of same parents achieve milestones at different times.

Learn to be a little sensitive and careful with your words. Put the other person in your shoes. Some of us do this things ignorantly without a bother. Some do this out of concern, but your concern may be causing another person to shed tears in
their corner.

Don’t be the cause of another person’s pain. Wear your sensitive caps. Be conscious around people. Read people’s body language. You can tell when somebody doesn’t wanna talk about something, or when our words have hit so deep and the person withdraws, but many of us just ignore this.

A while ago, I was in a public bus with a woman who had a baby. Another woman goes and rants about how the child was supposed to be walking and how her three children started working at that age. From where I was seated, I could see
tears build up in the woman’s eyes.

When we alighted from the bus, I walked up to the woman with the child and just hugged her. She cried some more. She told me that she had been to a paediatrician who had diagnosed her child of autism. The woman’s rant and insensitivity brought her problems back to her face.
It made me realize that even if I were concerned about a person, rather than bring it to their attention, I’d stay in my closet and pray for them.

If they’ve not asked for your opinion or shared their problems with you, don’t remind them. If you’ve made the mistake of mentioning it, retract, apologize and ask them if they wanna talk about it.

Don’t call people and be asking them when they’d get pregnant and call it looking out for a brother or sister. It’s a lie. You’re not minding your business. You’re poking your nose. Your intentions may be genuine but be tactful. It shouldn't be everything you open mouth and discuss especially when they've not discussed it with you.

If you're genuinely looking out for a brother or sister, then Pray. Do the praying for them if it bothers you so much. You’ll realize that many people can not and would not spend five minutes praying for you yet want to discuss your problems or concerns with you. You don't know how to pray for me, but you want me to believe you care?

A friend of mine told me how somebody messaged her to ask her about children.
He even went further to say that he heard that she already had three kids. He was asking her this because he wanted to get words out of her mouth and know the situation of things.

Ha! I felt very horrible. What’s your business with another’s person’s decision to have or not have kids?

• Why do you make another person’s matter your worry?
  Many people have this horrible attitude of not knowing when to mind their business.
  Furthermore, avoid asking people when they’d get married. People are going through genuine relationship issues. They don’t like to be reminded that they’re not dating or in a relationship. They don’t like to be reminded that they’re getting any younger. Many people are genuinely hurting from past relationships.

I have a close friend who hasn’t dated at all. Recently, I had the premonition to pray for her. I didn’t go asking her about her boyfriends because she had not discussed this with me. After I prayed, I saw a message sharing her concerns with me. It was when she shared this, I shared some encouraging words with her. If she hadn’t told me and even though I was genuinely worried for her, I’d pray for her.
That’s the best thing to do.
If they’ve not told you about their problems, stick with what concerns you, it’s none of your business. If you’re very concerned, or you wanna show that you really care, then pray for them. Your prayers would be answered without mentioning it to them. The efficacy of your prayers isn’t when you mention your concerns to them.

Please let’s do better and be more sensitive towards people. If you really care,
remember you can pray for them.
Thank you.

Thanks for stopping by my blog.