June Grow Up! Happy HPUD!
June 1st, already? Time to grow together again!
I'm simply chuffed to tell you that much like this fella above, somehow, I've found a way to grow despite weird circumstances. Over the last few months it has felt as if every factor has been set against my goals. Anxiety, health issues, and an over abundance of life.
It is not my intention to complain about these details, rather to highlight how they define the things I'm proud of. I told myself I'd write 20+ posts in April, but shoot for 30. I managed 5... less than I ever had before. That is, until May. I got a whopping 3 posts finished.
There was a huge mentality shift in me in May, and it definitely doesn't have to do with caring about Hive less. It has to do with craving achievement less. Not pressuring myself so much. Accepting failures. I was dead set on being a dolphin by June 1st, and that didn't happen.
Instead, I'd rather focus on the things that did happen in May. I read A LOT of great blogs across a variety of communities. I watched some people I've been rooting for advance to minnow, establish a niche, find their cadence.
I enjoyed seeing the small shifts and changes that signify future growth. But mostly, I spent time making a life that I want. Some days, I only opened my computer to leave a few comments and curate, and I let myself feel fine about that. I slowed down a tad.
Instead of trying to force the words out of my head, which seem to be glued to my brain fibers... I decided to let go of my yearly writing goal's strict parameters. I wrote every day for over 2 hours for a little over 8 months, productively. You know what? I began to not enjoy my writing time.
Rules! I made so many impossible rules!
Sometime in late April, a good friend of mine said "You know you have two small kids, right?" It was the free pass I'd never give myself. The idea that, yeah, it's okay that I'm busy. It's okay to not do the next thing, over and over again, endlessly.
Will I look back at this time and think... "My kids were great, but I sure wish I'd wore myself to the bone to produce that novel faster!" No. I will not, and the fact I was thinking that way months back is... Icky. The people who love me have gathered to tell me to calm the fuck down.
Somehow, miraculously, that got through to me a bit. I don't know what it really means yet in my life... But instead of hyperventilating over social anxiety thoughts that tell me everything I say is silly, or perfectionist thoughts which tell me I must look it all over, just once more...
I'm taking 5 cleansing breaths, I'm writing in 10-minute bursts while my kids run in the park, I'm painting my toenails more. I'm getting rid of the rules that don't actually need to be there, and laughing at the idea I thought that they did.
Roots. This summer is about strengthening my roots for me. I wake up and pretend I know how to do yoga, I dance badly, I go and talk to a therapist. I'm practicing saying "NO!" at the insistence of a few amazing souls. And I'm accepting that sometime before my cake day, I will probably be a dolphin. I certainly will be having fun in the meantime.
If I'm not? Then I'll be glad I have what really matters here. Friends, community, inspiration!
As for now, I took a few big bounds this month despite not posting much. After pulling my savings, I have officially powered up 100% of the Hive I've received from posts, and then a bit more. Here is my powerup for today:
Including my 300HP Power up earlier in the month, this now brings me to a grand total of 4944 HP!
Yay for big bees, summertime, and the fun of HPUD! Cheers everyone 💚
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Congratulations @grindan! You received a personal badge!
See you at the next Power Up day to see if you will repeat this feat.
May the Hive Power be with you!
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Trees seem better than people because new growth comes from old stumps.
Books will come when they are ready. Don't stress it. They are written when they are written and no sooner. Take care of your health and enjoy the process.
Kids need immediate attention. I guess your kid is a Huskies fan. I spent a lot of time as a kid exploring the Cook Country Forest preserve. There was a nice nature center that I used to visit. Nature may be the world's best educator.
I like to think people can regrow from 'old stumps' too, but I am eternal optimist 😂
You are a parent yourself if I remember? Sage advice, I greatly appreciate the reiteration... It can be easy as parents at times to just get W A C K Y !LOLZ
The Huskies must be the team that his hoodie displays? I am not a sportster, just an avid thrift shopper hahaha 😆! That's awesome it conjured some related memories for you! I could not agree more, nature deserves teacher of the year, every year!
Thank so very much for the wonderful comment! 💚
lolztoken.com
Now I have all Kenny logins
Credit: reddit
@mineopoly, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @grindan
(2/4)
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ
Haha. I see now you got a good deal on the OPRF sweater. Cool kid.
That's wisdom! 💜👍 We weren't given lives as a punishment, but as a prize to be cherished and enjoyed!
!HUG
I sent 1.0 HUG on behalf of @treefrognada.
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Oh my gosh! I loved how you said that... YES! Life should not be a punishment, I'm going to journal that later! Thanks for the awesome comment my friend 🤗 !LUV !PIZZA !LADY
@treefrognada, @grindan(2/4) sent you LUV. | tools | discord | community |
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Wow, thank you! I wasn't sure if it'd come across as all preachy or something - like "be grateful for what you have and life is a test blah blah" because that's definitely not my philosophy - but hit the reply button anyway.
!PIZZA
!ALIVE
@grindan! You Are Alive so I just staked 0.1 $ALIVE to your account on behalf of @treefrognada. (1/10)
The tip has been paid for by the We Are Alive Tribe through the earnings on @alive.chat, feel free to swing by our daily chat any time you want.
Thank you Kitty ❤️🤗
$PIZZA slices delivered:
grindan tipped treefrognada
@treefrognada(1/5) tipped @grindan
1k power up! That’s amazing 🤩 and you’ve only been here for 10 months - you’re doing incredibly well, so pat yourself on the back.
I set myself a goal to be a dolphin by the end of this year, but I know it was a bit delusional of me to do that. Once the numbers were trying to dictate my creativity I turned the other direction and posted less and less, similarly to you.
You know, some years ago I thought anxiety was not real. ‘It’s all in people’s heads’ I’d say. While I still think it’s all created in the head, from our thoughts of ourselves, of what we need to do, the goals, the bills, the relationships, I now know it’s very real and it moves from the head to the solar plexus where is resides almost permanently and affects all areas of life. When it arrived in my life in a big wave last year, I had to see my doctor to get some medication for it. It helped, so after half a year I stopped taking it.
Now that another wave has arrived I really want to find a way to manage it by myself, but it is really, really tricky.
I hope you’ll find your way too. Taking it easy with strict goals you first set for yourself is sure a great step 💙
!HUG
I sent 1.0 HUG on behalf of @fantagira.
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