MY RELATIONSHIP: I NEVER WANT HER TO GO
Thank you, Mr., Ray for letting me know about this competition. I will not only write in this competition; I will also read all the entries because there is so much to learn about relationships.
This post is a submission to the ComedyOpenMic ft Paritae blogging competition "Dating Chronicles" Hive Blogging Competition. Over $150 in prizes!
Breaking up with someone you loved is a big task for me; I don’t know for others but for me it wasn’t easy. She was my best friend from the beginning before we started dating. It was when I was in higher institution, I started to have feelings for her. When my friends were talking about the girls they loved, I would be looking at them because I never had the experience of what love looked like.
But one thing I realized was that whenever I am on vacation, I love to see her and talk to her👩❤️👨. There was a day I spent 12 hours with her in her house without thinking of going home. She was the one that said, “Chris the day is getting dark”. Yet, I don’t feel like leaving her house; unlike me that I hardly spend so much time with people, hardly spent much time with my male friends.
Whenever I was in her house, she cooked food and said we should eat together. Well! For me, I haven’t tried such things with ladies and I am also a shy person. I said to her, ‘thank you’ because of shyness.
She said to me, “if you did not eat my food, I will get angry with you”.
And I didn’t want her to get angry with me, she took the other spoon and gave it to me; as I was eating, the food did not go well because I was still shy.
She said, “Chris you need to eat my food and you don’t need to get afraid of anyone, you are my friend, aren’t you? If you can’t eat at my house, where else will you eat? don’t tell me that you only eat the food that your mummy prepared”.
I never knew she studied me very well; she knew that I am afraid of her parents so much; and her parents never say anything negative to me. Until one day she told me that, “Chris my parents loved you”.
There was a day I went to her house, I was hanging around her family house; since I did not see her in front of the house, I wanted to go back to my house, that was when I saw her father behind me coming from town. I nearly got freeze that day; when I greeted him, he replied. I wanted to turn back, but he said, “your friend is inside".
That was how I summoned courage and gained confidence.
We always see each other's at least four times a week because we attended the same church, and our house was not far from each other. She never visited me in my family house.
I never thought of why she never visited me; just happy to see her.
Whenever I went to her house, she always wanted me to eat before leaving; and I wasn’t brought up in that way. When I was a child, my parents forbade me from eating outside. Therefore, even though I am hungry, I must return back home before eating; also, my parents do give me enough money after I ate morning food while I was in secondary school. Hmmm! I never knew what hunger was like because I ate to my satisfaction and they gave me money to buy whatever I wanted while I was in secondary school.
This was the reason I did not have interest in eating outside.
On this faithful day, I went to her house again, and she cooked delicious food; after she served her parents in my presence, she ditched my own and her own in one plate; she brough it to me and said, “let eat together”.
I was trying to let her know that her parents were there; she insisted that you must eat. Then, I came up with a lie that I just finished eating food before coming here. She said “you must taste this one”. I took the spoon and ate the food with her; the food was very delicious.
Her father called me and said that, "If I need any financial help, I should let him know". Never knew that he loved me, I thought what she told me was to make me comfortable in her house because she knew I wasn’t.
That was how the relationship got started: when I went back to school, we spent hours talking on the phone. Thank God for MTN night plan, all I need to do was to get #100 in my balance. There was not a day we didn’t talk in the night; at least we would talk for an hour and sometime we talked until day break. My brothers recharged me while I was in higher institution at least once a week. Therefore, I called her every two hours in the daytime. I can’t even remember what we used to talk about.
Despite the young ladies around me in the school, I never loved any one of them. My friends were thinking I had a problem because I never showed interest in any lady on campus. Michael, who was my best friend said, “Chris you are in love with Florence, which was the lady I have been talking about”.
That was how I knew I loved her so much; The same week, I told her on phone that ‘I love her’. Our conversation became stronger, and we love each other so much.
Even though there was nothing to talk about, she talked about the food she ate. I don't actually talk because I am introvert.
When I was in final year, she got admission to high institution; I had a little problem then which was that the money they gave me to pay my school fees; I gambled with the money and I lost all the money.
I lied to my big brothers that there were books we must purchase, after I had collected the money for those books from them. I decided to change the title of those books; without hesitation they sent me the money but the money was not completed. I needed #10,000 to balance my tuition fees, including registration; I could no longer call my brothers again because I don’t want them to suspect that I was a gambler.
5 days for the school portal to close, to avoid extra charges, I called Florence to lend me #5,000 which was like $10 then. Without letting her know that I gambled with my school fees; I lied to her that my school fees were not complete after buying some books. She promised me that she would lend me the money; 48 hours to close the school portal, she refused to answer my calls again. I began to message her, calling her morning, evening and night. She neither answered nor returned my calls.
6 hours before the school portal closed, I went to one of my course mates, and she lent me the money. That was how I paid my Tuition fees.
Since then, she refused to answer my calls, replied to my messages and refused to call me for more than 7 months.
After I went to NYSC (National Youth Service Corps), that was after a year and 9 months; I called her number, she picked my call; and we spoke at length that day.
We started to talk again, after 2 months, I asked her ‘why did she refuse to answer me?’, I let her know that if you don’t have the money, it wasn’t a big deal, but keeping quiet and refusing to pick my calls for more than 7 months was dreadful. It is not an offense if you did not lend me the money; I loved you that was the reason I asked you; and you need to tell me that you don’t have if you don’t have.
She refused to tell me what really happened; that was how I lost trust in her. She really needed me so badly but concealed the truth away from me and all I wanted was the truth.
When she knew that I did not back down asking her what happened then; she opened up to me that she was duped by a man.
That was when I knew that she was unfaithful, infidel and she doesn’t deserve me at all. I went to my secret place and wept because I never loved any lady and refused to be in a relationship with any lady because I loved her.
After the whole scenario, I forgave her and made her my friend again.
She told me that she really loved me and we should get marry; I agreed to marry her again. But I no longer trusted her because I knew what she could do. When I saw her face-to-face, we spoke at length and I realized that she had someone else again.
After two months, I was told that she had done an introduction and a wedding date had been set.
Well! Poor me never believed that she did an introduction until she posted their pictures on Facebook. I was not confused even with the pictures posted on Facebook.
After 5 months, her fiancé died and the source of sickness was not known. When I asked her, she said, “he was sick for 2 days and died.
Just like my nature, I began to encourage her, share her up and advise her. She taught I should be happy because she fucked me up; but I made her to realize that even if I don’t marry you, I will love you, I will love your husband and your kids. That is how I am.
Today, she wants me back to her life because the man she thought she would marry is dead. She calls me often and she wants to see me by all means. I refused to give her my address, and whenever she needed my help, I gave it.
She realized how terrible she was; and she is pleading that she reading to change.
I began to think that even if she married, she would do the same thing.
Right now, I have someone in my life who cannot afford to lose me for a second, we have planned for our future; we are about to get wed.
I loved her and she loved me, she is sincere, trustworthy, transparent, smart, futuristic and beautiful than her in everything.
In my new relationship, I have peace within and outside me, I am happy with her.
Now that she is looking for any means to come back to my life, what do you think I should do?
I stand up for success, and success is not achieved by merely making mouth, No room for laziness, no room for idleness. Success comes to the people who are desperately and consciously searching for it. When it seems unsuccessful or you smell failure around you, never discourage yourself from being successful.
“Discouragement and failure are the two surest stepping stones to success.” - Dale
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