I visited a retreat center to help students reflect and they cried. Here's the full story.

Hi, my dear Hive friends! Welcome back to my blog and I’m happy you’re here to read it. This blog will tell you the story of my face-to-face recollection speaker experience at Capuchin Retreat Center last May 19, 2023, and the heartwarming moments that happened – some of them made me emotional while some helped me see a different perspective.

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Here’s a snippet of one of the student’s sharing:

“Dear Valerie (not her real name),
Sorry it took me so long to talk to you. Sorry this is my first time speaking to you. I just want to tell you that you made it through your darkest times. You’ve overcome your suicidal thoughts and I’m so proud of you,”

Fun fact: My first speakership engagement
Did you know my first speakership engagement was for a recollection of junior high school students? I was just 19, but I felt right at home while talking about my experiences, dealing with the need to belong, and the importance of empowering self-talk.

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my first recollection engagement

That moment jump-started my public speaking gigs until, more than two years later, it led me to a meaningful night with the ICT-ED Institute of Science and Technology students.

How it happened
A month ago, my Facebook page received a message from Sir Jojie inquiring about my services as a speaker. “Do I also speak at recollections?” he asked. I responded with delight, remembering my first time as a recollection speaker, and I said yes. We chatted back and forth about the program and theme.

Days went by, preparing my presentation and printing out my materials, until I arrived at the Capuchin Retreat Center.

Photo grabbed from wowbatangas.com

This is located in San Sebastian, Lipa City, Batangas, which houses 80 private rooms, each equipped with a toilet and bath, and can accommodate as many as 220 overnight guests.

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The Capuchin has a spacious private Chapel, a prayer room, four (4) spacious conference halls that may be used with or without air-conditioning, and a modern audio-visual hall that may be converted into a conference hall.

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Upon arriving, Sir Jojie toured me around the halls while the students roamed during their free time. He showed me to my room, and I was pleasantly surprised that I had it all to myself.

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Despite being a people person, I still like my personal space and introvert-recharging time, so this was exactly up to my taste. A part of me felt surreal because I was being treated with respect as a speaker, and I experienced the perks of being accommodated.

Unfortunately, there was a power interruption, but we were informed that it would be back at 5:00 pm, the exact time for my talk. Trying not to break too much sweat, I sat like a statue on the bed and rehearsed the flow of my talk.

Helping students reflect and have inner peace
Recollections have a different structure than a regular mental health seminar that I usually do. They are designed to be thought-provoking, reflective, and more personal – aka, we make the participants cry! Just kidding!

But it is meant to speak to your heart, mind, and soul; even the manner of my delivery is curated to fit the sentimental atmosphere of a recollection. Although this is more practice and adjustment on my part, I happily accepted this task because it’s also helping me grow as a mental health speaker.

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The lights were back! It’s time to be on stage in front of 96 students, from junior high school to college, and discuss 𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐒𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐌𝐲 𝐏𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 derived from their theme, “Living With Purpose: My Career Journey with God and Family.”

You might be wondering how it was possible to combine different grade levels and have the same learning points. Well, it wasn’t easy, but the key was finding common ground and anchoring a universal human experience across all ages.

A glimpse inside the talk
Like a lightbulb shining on my head, I looked at the first phrase of the theme, “Living With Purpose,” and had three questions: What does it mean to be really living? What does it mean to have a purpose? Why are these two important?

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ᵉᵈⁱᵗᵉᵈ ⁱⁿ ᶜᵃⁿᵛᵃ

I believe that these are essential to reflect on during our adolescent life. It’s a crucial stage where you’re between academic routines and discovering who you are. This is when you’re figuring out your likes and dislikes; personality traits are formed and reinforced, surrounded by the expectations of others and ourselves. Caught in the maze of assignments, tests, and social pressure, you can easily fall into autopilot or survival mode. You may even believe that life is just one big mess of stress.

When the youth lose hope, we lose the dreamers who can transform our society. We lose the outside-the-box thinkers who can bring new perspectives. The magic that sustains us will be lost, leaving us in a zombie-like spell, and society will crumble. That’s why we need to support their lives and promote living than surviving.

A meaningful recollection activity
Dear Self is a letter-writing activity that is dedicated to yourself. This activity became a great opportunity to look deeper within themselves and find the healing words they needed to bring to the surface.

For instance, a brave participant shared that it was their first time experiencing this kind of self-reflection, saying they were surprised at how far they’ve come. Unknowingly, they started to cry while sharing their letter. I heard “Awws” and “Proud of you!” in the crowd.

Another student shared in their letter how they could finally say they love their body and she should keep fighting despite what other people say.

Meanwhile, one approached me to share that although they lost a special person in their life, he realized that he still had himself to lean on too, but by the end of the night, he had 90 more people and one mental health advocate.

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To be honest, I was holding back my tears at the sight of the students, who had their first face-to-face recollection after staying online for two years, being open and vulnerable. I could see the light in their eyes when they participated. I could tell they’ve been waiting for someone to hear them, feeling relieved they have a safe space to discuss their personal issues.

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Hearing about their struggles made me want to do more for mental health; even though it wasn’t part of the program, I added an open forum, Q&A style.

Once the program ended, a few students approached me to say that the talk was moving and truly helped them. In truth, I’m the one who is incredibly grateful to be given this speakership opportunity. It reignited my passion for mental health when I felt like I’m mostly weathering away.

The Capuchin Retreat Center is indeed a perfect place for individuals to step out of the tech-driven world and take a breather. Lined with towering native trees, I found myself slowing down my steps before coming home. I was in awe, from the students' strong-willed hearts and my accomplishment of being a recollection speaker, to the inner knowing that this is what I should be doing my whole life. Healing others in my speech, in my presence, and in my being.

Thank you for reading and supporting my blog 💜

ᴬˡˡ ᵖʰᵒᵗᵒˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵐⁱⁿᵉ ᵘⁿˡᵉˢˢ ᵒᵗʰᵉʳʷⁱˢᵉ ˢᵗᵃᵗᵉᵈ.

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A meaningful and lovely writeup dear friend...
Thanks for sharing

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Hello ish! Ang sarap mo talaga kausap ang para super gaan mag open up sayo hehehe kaya naman talaga ikaw ang perfect speaker sa mga ganyang event. 💓

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Ate cindeeee~ 🤗 maraming salamat! baka may school dyan sa inyo na need ng speaker HAHAHA

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