We almost passed out from the heat inside the restaurant so we drew. Here's the full story.

The cleaning lady said there was a heatwave. What better to counter the sun’s glare than sketching the Taal volcano? Admittedly, there was no logical reasoning behind stringing along Arc and Jude to the deck of Bulalo Capital and drawing whatever sparked inspiration under the sun’s glare, but it beat waiting for our lunch inside a melting pot of overlapping voices.

Little did they know, there are two deeper reasons for doing this art activity: It was both a tradition of mine and a self-regulating technique. Things become a tradition because it’s something you practice over time, right? This means it wasn’t the first time I sketched my surroundings and made it a souvenir, memorabilia of my experience. It started last year when I found myself in Nasugbu, Batangas, with buskers who performed in celebration of former Vice President Atty. Leni Robredo’s birthday.

Back then, I traveled miles away from home to escape my situation badly. My head held the memory of being attacked, proving, at that time, I was loveless. I was abandoned. Desperate, I messaged a stranger about their trip to Nasugbu and hopped in the van with them. (Don’t worry, they were good people, and we became friends.) Some had a jamming session that night on the blackened sand while I grabbed my notebook, sketching the tanks, the singers, the stars, and the sea.

I was essentially dead, but art grounded me in small details that make life worth living. I promised myself to collect these tiny sketches that would remind me someday when I’m having a terrible day in the future, that I lived through hell and continued to thrive. All because of a page in my notebook with markings of my pen scribbles.

Over time, having a pen and notebook became necessary items in my bag. Although its purpose changed into noting down my grocery lists, writing an idea, or random thoughts, its presence lets me know I can be human, who feels and thinks. That’s why it has self-regulating properties as well. Whether writing or drawing on paper, it helps calm my mind and body. The loudness of the world turns into background noise. My breathing steadies and my hand moves the pen wherever it wants.

There’s no wonder why I implemented this for our Tagaytay trip as well. Firstly, I wanted something to take home with me - I’m a little sentimental like that - so I can replay how it feels to gaze at the breathtaking view of the Taal volcano. Secondly, I have a confession: The restaurant was overstimulating. It was too hot and too noisy.

As a childhood trauma survivor, noises and changes in temperature can trigger us. I have a hypervigilant mind because I need to learn to anticipate threats, so a mere knock, footstep, or car engine ticks me off. What more is a fully-packed restaurant during a heatwave? Thankfully, I didn’t experience any flashbacks or panic attacks since I quickly put on my headphones, resulting in some comfort and ease.

Time for the drawing!
The instructions are simple. Draw anything you see in three minutes. This is what we came up with!

Shout out to Arc who gave us pieces of paper from her notebook and being the inspiration for this activity. If they weren't writing next to me, I wouldn't have remembered my tradition and helped me regulate in a crowded place.

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This is just part 1 of my series about the @hivephilippines meet-up last April 29-May 1. If you enjoyed this, make sure to stay tuned for the next blog by following me and commenting down below your thoughts.

ᴬˡˡ ᵖʰᵒᵗᵒˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵐⁱⁿᵉ ᵘⁿˡᵉˢˢ ᵒᵗʰᵉʳʷⁱˢᵉ ˢᵗᵃᵗᵉᵈ.