Can you just wake up and have a significant other?

That's not how it works. I mean, sure, you can have a significant other if you want to, but it's not like there's a ceremony or anything. You just decide that you're in a relationship with someone and then you are. If you break up, you go your separate ways. It's all about what you want."

"You don't get into relationships for the sake of having a significant other?"

Source
"Nope," she said. "I'm not saying that relationships aren't important. They are. But they're not the only thing that matters in life. There's more to it than that.”

"And what is it?"

"Oh, I don't know," she said. "Maybe just being able to enjoy the time you spend with people, no matter who they are. Having fun and laughing and just enjoying each other's company. And maybe there's more to it than that. Maybe it's the way you feel when you look at someone, or maybe it's the way you feel when you touch them. But whatever it is, it's something that's a part of you. You can't live without it. It makes you happy and gives you meaning and purpose, even if you're not always aware of it. That's what it means to be in a relationship. And you have to be ready for it. If you're not ready, you might as well stay single."

"I don't understand," I said. "What do you mean, 'you have to be ready for it?"

"It's not something you can just jump into," she said. "It takes time. You need to build trust and get to know someone before you can commit to them. That's what it means to be ready. If you're not ready, you'll end up hurting someone else and you'll both be hurt. But if you're ready, then you're ready. You'll know it. And you'll be able to handle it."

"But why is it so important that I'm ready?" I asked. "What if I want to have a relationship with someone but I'm not sure that I'm ready? Can't I just take my time and see how things go?"

"Sure," she said. "You can do that. But if you really want to be in a relationship, then you have to be ready. It's part of the process. If you're not ready, then you're just going to be hurting someone else and yourself. It's not worth it. Not for you and not for them. You have to be ready."

"But what if I'm not ready?" I asked. "I mean, what if I don't want to be in a relationship right now?"

"Then you shouldn't be," she said. "You should just stay single and focus on your studies. That's what you need to do."

"But I don't want to," I said. "I want to be in a relationship. I want to have someone to share my life with."

"That's good," she said. "That's great. But you have to be ready first. Otherwise, you'll just be hurting people. And it's not fair to them. They deserve better than that."