What A Lady Can Teach A Lady (LoH #97)

September 2, 2022

Happy September Ladies of Hive!
I hope everyone is doing great and staying positive regardless of the negativity around us, as well as the negative crypto market, lol. Let's look forward to a better September for the betterness of everyone.

I was reading different entries of different ladies for the current #LoH contest and everyone has a say.

The topics made by @saffisara are as follows:

1. What’s something you could teach me about?

2. What’s the most useful thing you own?

Teaching is a continuous process and anyone can make it while learning. That's hitting two birds with one stone. There are a plethora of lessons to teach and things to be learned. I was thinking about what I could teach to others, certainly not about crypto investing strategy as I always failed in that matter. My life too is a mess, boring, and chaotic, and have no interesting facts aside from my different travel stories. Love life is null, so what else can I teach to others? I do have a lot of motivating stories to share if permitted, but that would take longer to tell.

The only thought I have in mind now is, what a lady can teach a lady.

Image created on Canva

So @saffisara, here are things I could teach you and other ladies of Hive.

• Don't look down on yourself. Ladies also have a place in society

Most of the time, we ladies are often disregarded as people look at us as inferior to men, that they are stronger and more capable of doing a lot of things than us, so they are considered superior in many aspects. Most people believe that we, women are just for a home that would cater to the needs of the family, follow what hubby wants, clean the house, take care of children, and others.

And being in this Chinese country for quite long years, I witnessed a lot of times how men look down on women. Most of them believe that a woman will only get married to a man and serve her family after school. So she must beautify herself and perform better to please her future partner. That's pretty absurd. Can we just beautify ourselves and be successful in the field we have chosen just for ourselves alone? That's always what I thought every time I hear a such conversation here.

_{Image by Alicia Steels from Unsplash}

It is worth noting that we are already in this modern era where everyone, regardless of gender, is equal and capable of doing the same thing. Besides, there are also a lot of things that a man can't do. Did they even experience a painful dysme every first day of the monthly period? Do men know what it feels like to carry a child in the womb for many months, sacrifice a lot of things, deprive themselves of taking what they like, and the painful labor in the end? And pacify a crying child after. Those sleepless nights and tiring days are incomparable and they will continue until a child grows and learn to stand on his own.

We have a place in society because it won't be complete without women. So never look down on yourself every time men and women are being compared. We all are equal and have our own roles in society in different aspects. Instead, cheer up and prove to them what a lady can do! We can be superior as well!

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• Love yourself. All ladies are beautiful.

We, Ladies always want to look beautiful, aren't we?

But why do you want to look beautiful by the way? Is that because you want to get the attention of men? Is it because you want to be more confident in the physical world? Or is it because you want to be accepted by society? I bet it's because of the last one, isn't it?

That is because we only perceive beauty as those with pleasing physical attributes. The real pretty physically, sexy, fair-skinned, with a pretty dress. So many nowadays are into beautifying themselves just to look pretty in the eyes of others. And also not to be criticized.

The social media impact is also another factor why a lot want to look pleasing and beautiful in front of others. We tend to go with the flow, dress fashionably, apply make-up, use aesthetics to look beautiful, and mask our flaws.

However, those who can't afford to do so tend to lose their confidence as they regard themselves as ugly and feel different from the literal definition of beauty. They tend to avoid the crowd just not to be criticized, and that affects a lot of aspects of their life. They become introverts and anti-social.

And here's the main thing I could share with the ladies here.

I was once a so ugly duckling, that's how I considered myself before because I was too different from my mother who has fair skin and a pretty face, and my relatives are pretty too. I tend to use different beauty products as I wanted to be fairer like others, look beautiful in the crowd, and I thought I could gain more confidence when doing so.

My old self

Yet, even how much we conceal our flaws, they will always be revealed and the effect of those products is just temporary, not long-lasting. Besides, it's too costly to maintain them all.

But do you know the only secret to becoming beautiful? That's to love ourselves and accept our flaws because we all are naturally beautiful, yet imperfect. And that's what makes us unique.

As we start to love ourselves, we would start to appreciate our own beauty, even our flaws. But as a lady, you should also care about yourself and don't take it for granted. If you want to be beautiful, don't hesitate to make a change. Don't hesitate to reveal the real you. You can be beautiful in your own way, you just need to discover what aspect you are beautiful. Then you'll discover more beautiful sides of yourself.

Change yourself while maintaining the real you. Do you want to dress prettily? Go and buy a pretty dress and wear it not because of others, but for yourself. Are you not confident of your looks because of your flaws? Don't give a single d*mn to those who will bash your look. Be confident and beautiful and wear whatever dress you like.
Just do what you feel could make you pretty, naturally.

You won't make a change if you won't make a move and keep hesitating. Love yourself and take care of it. That's how an ugly duckling could turn into a beautiful swan.

But actually, beauty doesn't really matter here, but the character.

• We all are beautiful, it's the character that makes us ugly

I have written about this matter on another platform long ago wherein I tackled different examples of beauty and character. As mentioned above, we tend to change our physical attributes just to be accepted in society, because it's full of judgemental people. We don't want to be criticized that is why we want to look beautiful in front of the crowd.

But it's worth noting that it's not our physical beauty that makes us good humans, it's always our beautiful character.

So instead of putting more time and effort into fixing your physical appearance, you better exert more effort on how to build a better character and be a good individual. A character that will be remembered even if we get old and leave this world. Remember that beauty fades, but not a good heart.

So that's all I can teach you ladies oh Hive. There are a lot more. It's easier said than done though hard to apply. It's a matter of self-discipline as well.

Before I end this, let me answer the last question.
What’s the most useful thing you own?

It's no other than my phone.

A photo of my phone

I'm a person with a full-time job offline and with side hustles online. I always have a lot on my plate and it's often hard to manage everything before the day ends. It's only my phone that can help me continue my side hustles online even if I am working offline. It's easier to manage and do blogs that way. Besides, I can bring it anywhere I go and continue interacting online or writing articles.

Aside from blogging, another important use of my phone is for trading and managing my crypto wallets. When my laptop was broken, I have no other device to use to manage everything online, but my phone. I'm still into saving more so I could buy a new laptop within this year.

But the most important usage of my phone is for communicating with my family abroad. I've been separated from my family for almost five years, and the only way to keep us connected is through social media using my phone.

So I can say that, nowadays, I can't live without my phone, especially since I'm working abroad. And we can't deny the fact that the phone is so useful in so many ways.

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That's all ladies. I hope you have learned something here.
I am inviting @garrethgrey @wittyzell @hopestylist to join the current #LoH contest.

Good luck and happy September!