Su propio Mundial / Your own World Cup

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(Edited)

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SU PROPIO MUNDIAL

     Con premura subieron a la mujer en la camilla porque sus dolores anunciaban que rompería fuente. Era la decimanovena que llegaba en apenas veinte minutos de haberse hecho el cambio de personal de guardia del hospital. Lo mismo pasaba en los demás centros de salud, no solo públicos, también privados, y no solo de aquella región, sino del mundo; como si los dolores de parto se hubiesen sincronizado y un reloj mundial anunciara, con un imponente y tierno toque de clarín, una llamada universal a todas las embarazadas.

     Era imposible creer que todas dieran luz el mismo día y a la misma hora, y no solo las de los nueve meses, también sintieron dolores de parto las recién embarazadas y las que estaban entre el primer y el último mes. Era un inmenso riesgo lo que estaba sucediendo porque no había personal para atender los partos, pero también era extraño porque ninguna lograba dar a luz a pesar de las contracciones.

     Todos los hospitales estaban repletos de barrigonas con los mismos síntomas, con sus familiares al pendiente y con el vientre agitado por las patadas de los bebés. El hecho coincidió con un extraño fenómeno que estaba sucediendo en el mundo para entonces; en varias partes del planeta Tierra algunas especies de animales se encontraban extrañamente caminando en círculos. Se supo de las ovejas en Mongolia; de los renos en Rusia; de las ballenas orcas en Chile, de las hormigas en diferentes partes del mundo; lo que llevó a creer a muchos que los bebés estaban dando círculos en el vientre de sus madres como señal de protesta por el cambio climático.

     Se dijo de todo, hasta que la protesta de los bebés en el vientre era porque renegaban de su sexo, porque venían evolucionados y estaban peleando su derecho a su identidad sexual; se habló de posibles sismos, del Apocalipsis, de que la Tierra por fin nos tragaría; pero aquí seguimos, con dos guerras en marcha; la del Putín en Ucrania y la del mundial en Qatar, y a esta última se unieron los bebés; como era de esperarse por su inclinación al juego y por la cultura futbolista del mundo. Los bebés pateaban desde el vientre porque estaban haciendo su propio mundial.


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ITS OWN WORLD CUP

     The woman was taken to the stretcher because her pains announced that she was about to give birth. She was the nineteenth to arrive in barely twenty minutes after the hospital's on-call staff had changed. The same thing was happening in the other health centers, not only public, but also private, and not only in that region, but in the world; as if the labor pains had been synchronized and a world clock announced, with an imposing and tender clarion call, a universal call to all pregnant women.

     It was impossible to believe that they would all give birth on the same day and at the same time, and not only those nine months old, but also the newly pregnant and those between the first and the last month. It was an immense risk because there was no staff to attend the deliveries, but it was also strange because none of them managed to give birth despite the contractions.

     All the hospitals were full of big bellies with the same symptoms, with their relatives watching them and their bellies churning from the babies' kicks. The event coincided with a strange phenomenon that was occurring in the world at the time; in various parts of planet Earth some species of animals were strangely walking in circles. There were sheep in Mongolia; reindeer in Russia; orca whales in Chile; ants in different parts of the world; leading many to believe that the calves were circling in their mothers' wombs as a sign of protest against climate change.

     Everything was said, including that the protest of the babies in the womb was because they were denying their sex, because they were evolved and fighting for their right to their sexual identity; there was talk of possible earthquakes, of the Apocalypse, that the Earth would finally swallow us up; but here we are, with two wars going on; Putin's war in Ukraine and the World Cup in Qatar, and the babies joined the latter; as was to be expected because of their penchant for the game and the world's soccer culture. Babies were kicking from the womb because they were having their own World Cup.




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