Twenty friends cannot be friends after twenty years!!!

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The nostalgia of childhood friendship has an indelible mark on us differently. I will be sharing in brief my experiences meeting some childhood friends and my expectations when I meet those I have yet to meet.

In a recent post , I shared my experience with a primary school classmate whom I thought I knew but had, over the years, changed totally. There's a saying that twenty friends cannot be friends for twenty years, and this may be very true.

About three to five years ago, I created a WhatsApp group that contained my primary school classmates from 2002. We were excited to reunite as we began to introduce ourselves, disclosing locations, jobs, etc. Pictures were equally shared, and some of us looked the same facially while others were barely recognizable.

We took a step further to have a physical reunion in December 2019 and had about 25 of us in attendance. Many of us were married and had kids, while a few, like me, have been unmarried. We were all smiles and laughter at the reunion, and some of us still bonded further in little cliques while a few sat alone waiting for the event to commence. This yet again buttressed the fact that some people felt out of place despite being present for the reunion.

I must also state here that life remains unbalanced. Some awkwardness erupts when a few of our childhood friends have attained some significant degree of achievement in life while others are average or struggling. There are possible scenarios that can play out here, and these include:

  1. Excitement: Meeting with childhood friends spurs excitement as memories are recounted and a lot of catching up is done.

  2. Pride, arrogance, and intimidation: it is only right to state that we all cannot be the same after many years of being apart. As earlier stated, some people would have become rich, probably very rich, while others could barely afford a three-square meal. A reunion can bring awkwardness or pride between these two friends. I could be very excited to meet a childhood friend, but he or she may consider me an underachiever, and though we may feign happiness at the reunion, sooner or later we may reveal pride or arrogance to delineate how far we all have come. On our WhatsApp group, for example, there were pictures of classmates who could easily be identified as rich or comfortable, while others showed lesser status, and some people preferred not to disclose their current status for reasons best known to them.

  3. Unrecognized childhood friends: memory is imperfect, and thus, there are possible options for not recognizing one another when we meet. I felt bad recently when a woman called my name on an occasion while I struggled to recognize her. I apologized when I got to know she was one of my teachers while I was in primary school. And when such happens among childhood friends, it could be termed "pride" for the party that recognizes the other.

  4. Personality judgment: as earlier stated, I had a terrible business transaction with a childhood friend whom I assumed I knew and judged by trusting him. There are a few others with whom we have enjoyed a happy relationship.

  5. Opportunities: One of the benefits we have enjoyed as childhood friends is the sharing of opportunities like jobs and scholarships. As an individual, I love to see all of us grow, and when opportunities arise, I readily share them with my primary school WhatsApp group. This is an obligation.

Now, to attempt to answer this prompt, there are friends like my deputy school prefect, Dolapo, in primary school (by the way, I was the head prefect), who I heard is in Canada and doing well. I am happy to know he's doing well, and it'll be a pleasure to see him again. Our reunion would be fun and full of catching up. There's another friend of mine by the name of Ahmed; he was my neighborhood friend. We lost contact when I went to another state for high school. I doubt if I can recognize him now, and I do not even know where he is at the moment.

Childhood was a phase I appreciated and that impacted me in good, bad, and ugly ways. As much as I'll love to reunite with them, I'll preferably keep most at arm's length. As the saying goes, twenty friends cannot be friends even after twenty years.

Thank you for reading. I would love to have your comments and contributions 🤗



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11 comments
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Bang, I did it again... I just rehived your post!
Week 157 of my contest just started...you can now check the winners of the previous week!
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Was wondering why you would not like to see any of your friend again. But then I remember some people could really be bad influ3nce

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I do not mind seeing them, I just may not trust to know their personalities and nature as before. Thank you for your kind comment

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As the saying goes, twenty friends cannot be friends even after twenty years.

This is true, time will definitely change people. We can not say they would be exactly as they were when they were little

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People change and grow.... especially when they go from children to adult.

Get togethers are nice as you mentioned but so true that people grow apart.

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Thank you for your comment. It's always a pleasure meeting childhood friends yet we must not lose guard to be careful of how each person has turned

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