Sadness: The painful truth about a boy child
Happy international day for the boy child.
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Every 16th of may is a day set aside to celebrate the boy child. But what baffles me is how quiet the day usually is, for almost everyone. I am sure a lot of persons didn't even know about this event. Unlike the international day for the girl child, where there is always so much awareness created for this day, it is so unfortunate that the same energy and awareness is not applicable to the boy child. And I ask, why?
Why does the society care less for a boy child? First of all, this is my own opinion and you can feel free to disagree too. A lot of homes, teaches their girl child to be domesticated and industrious whilst the boy child is allowed to roam about, play, and do nothing relating to house chores. This had made a lot of boys who have grown to be men, become so dependent on women to make their meals, wash their clothes and tidy the house.
It is believed that it is the man's responsibility to provide for the home, hence he is shouldered with the responsibility of working to feed the family. And I ask a simple question, what happens when he can't provide for the family? When he cannot provide, he is called "Lazy". Pushing him out there to always provide has made a lot of our boys, indulge in such ugly acts. The boy child isn't love and cared for. In fact a boy child is expected to bottle up his emotions and should never be seen crying.
As they grow from the boyhood stage to the manhood stage, they grow with these consciousness that they possess strong masculinity which naturally is expected to suppress every pain, whether psychologically, emotionally, physically and spiritually. It is expected that a man should always figure out things for himself. He is not expected to be seen giving up or even becoming weak no matter the situation. These are the reasons why a lot of these men become suicidal.
Sometimes when they manage to speak up, they are being laughed at and finally graced with the usual statement, " you are a man". Without helping them with a solution, we remind them that their masculinity is an edge and they should figure things out already.
How about being sexually abused? How do you react when you hear that a man has been raped? Sounds weird right? I know a lot of us feel exactly this way when we hear that? But how about when we hear that a woman has been raped? We feel pity for her and even most times protest on the streets calling out for justice for her. But why is it not so for the boy child? I have heard some very annoying questions like, if he didn't enjoy it, why did his penis rise? How can a man even be raped? A lot of crazy questions.
But look at all of these things and please don't forget that a boy child is first a human being before any other thing. They have blood running through their veins, they have emotions too. We all need to change this mindset and begin to nurture a boy child the same way we do to a girl child. Come to think of it, the girl child that you nurture today and neglect the boy child, will grow to marry the same boy child that has been neglected all the while. This is the reason why there are lots of irresponsible men out there just because they lacked the proper home training that they should have gotten as a child.
It is important that we fight against the imbalance and neglect of the boy child in the society. And this fight begins from changing our mindset.
What do you think about all of these? I would really love to hear from the male folks especially@readthisplease @onwugbenuvictor @attentionneeded @hironakamura @zestimony @deeiykes20 @snowflakesduke @martinlazizi @starstrings01 @josediccus
(I have the permission to tag some of you).
You forgot to add what about men receiving domestic abuse by their wives and yet nobody cares about that too?
In natural context they see boys different, expected to be strong always and don’t show any form of weakness. That’s how it is for most men out there. Crying is not the trait of a man
A very sad reality for the boy child. It is imperative that we change this ideology and begin to train the boy child just the same we attach a lot of carefulness to the girl child too.
Thank you for your input
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Thank you
The society has already paint men to the strong and shock/emotion absorber type so when they voice out their pain or emotions they see them as weak boys. That's why most men don't even bother opening up to their partner or anyone because they believe they will be seen as weak or would make no difference instead they struggle alone to find a solution to that problem.
Men are fragile too when you are close to one like really, you will see the complete personality without him hiding it, the emotions, weakness and loving part.
But at the end society will always be society, men will always be men, so they will keep bottling the emotions not to be seen as weak
You have spoken well. We need to start changing the narrative
Sad that boys are taught to feel this way, they are taught this directly or indirectly. I didn’t even know there was a boy child’s day.
First of all the label “the man of the house” is something I dislike to hear. It’s just another way the society has learnt to put so much pressure on the male child. Lots of boys have done lots of things because they want to live up to that label. Men need to learn to express their emotions, it’s not going to be easy but it’s essential.
Very essential my friend. These are the reasons why we have abusive men all over. Because they bottle up their feelings and cannot express them, they tend to express them through being abusive.
I hope we change this ideology soon.
Thank you for your input
God bless every boy child out there
I really did not even know the date personally
We need to pay more attention in praising and acknowledging the male kind
The male folks are also special people too. We need to create enough awareness too. Thank you for your input
True, to be a boy is not easy o
Sometimes they feel a woman will just get married to a man
Men toil so hard to put food on the table
Not easy my dear
Yes
God will help them
Our society today is full of weird double standards and it’s all normalized.
Happy international day to all the boy child out there, today is all about it you and your welfare.
Thanks @joydukeson for the awareness.
Weird double standard indeed. That's why we end up with a lot of irresponsible men.
It's all deep rooted, only if the in coming generation decides to change the narrative. Else I don't know any other way.
First of all, I didn't even know that the male child has a day set aside to celebrate us.
Being a boy or a man is not easy at all, the pressure that comes with it is a lot, but we are not allowed to show how it affects us, as you have rightly said in your post if a man should show how he really feels the society see the man as being weak and all, that is why most or almost all guys bottle up their feelings because we are taught to never show weakness.
You see?. The society barely cares about the boy child. Sad though.
The earlier we begin to change this narrative, the better for us. As long as this continues, we will continue to raise men who will always be heart hardened. And this is a big risk
People do not care less for the boy child in my opinion. It appears so because the girl child goes through worse physical situations from issues like genital mutilation to breast ironing and the likes. These things are very common in certain places and that's why voices became louder.
Boys too get abused. They get abused by women both sexually and physically. Because the society do not accept a man showing his emotions that is why we tend to hear more of the female voices than that of the men. Let's not pretend like we do not know that such things exists.
My point is that the same way we raise our voices for the girls, we should do do for the boys too.
Nobody says they don't get abused, we're all well aware of that. And nobody is stopping anyone from amplifying the day of the boy child. What's not proper in my opinion is when it's made to appear like there's too much focus on speaking for the girl child. One does not stop the other.
Okay I understand your opinion. But in mine, there is much focus on the girl child. A lot of persons do not even know that there is a day set aside to celebrate the boy child.
My main point is that enough awareness should be made for both the boy and girl child.
Thank you for your comments too💕
A great topic. The logic with which you lay it out is very compelling. Especially that reasoning that our girls will ultimately marry boys who have been emotionally neglected.... ...that idea is frightening. 😵
Boys and girls need our care, attention and love equally. They are a treasure, and we will endeavor to continue to value them.💕
Kisses @joydukeson 🌼
This point is the summary of everything. Same way we spend our time training a girl child to be domesticated, we should also use the same energy and apply same rule to the boy child.
I hope the narrative changes soon. Thank you for your input
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Thank you
Most women are celebrated by their children who see the sacrifices they make daily. Men rarely let you in to see their struggles or sacrifices, so we hardly know what to celebrate. while dads sit in front of the TV screens when at home, the mom is always busy.
This is so because we focus more on domestication of the girl child and leave men to live freely with the believe that they should leave their lives for themselves. We make them bottle up their emotions thus they grow with that feeling and keep to themselves even when they should speak up.
We need to change the narrative
Exactly 😢
Justice for us abeg
It's always the girl's thing while we are allowed to take it up on ourselves
Although nowadays we have improved drastically on the cooking aspect
Boys are actually neglected a lot, most people believe we have this suppressing spirit and hence we should not express our emotions
Beautiful post
Abi? That's why I am doing justice for you too😂
Thanks a lot
The boy child also has there weakness but they are placed high in the society forgetting they are also humans.
Nice write up ✍️
Happy international Boys day to All boy Child.
We need to consciously discard this mentality and treat them just the same way we treat women too
Yeah my dear the society needs rebranding on that
It’s so sad and as a mum I can only say it’s bad that can even happen
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You have spoken well. Truly a sad reality. Thank you too for the token.
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The boy child is being treated like an adult from day one, and expected to be invincible.
I'm even surprised that they are being celebrated. When I saw this first, I thought it was "boyfriends" day, because it will mean a feminine event.
At least, we are being remembered even if the wave is so small that it can't move a piece of tissue paper.
It's better than nothing.
Common nau😂😂😂😂.
Glad you read through the content and now you know there is a day set aside for you.
For where?
Had it been this thing made waves like feminine events, boys would have been receiving messages like: It's boys child day oh! What do you have to your girl na? You will take me out na let's celebrate you properly
I don't want to mention names.
Please don't mention names ooo😂😂😂.
You just cracked me up