Fighting Boredom, Freezing, & Missing Cambodia 🥶🔥
Partly due to not being in good spirits, and partly due to a very boring day-to-day life here in the USA, I haven't been posting much since arriving in the USA.
The First Blue Sky ☀️
I've been in the USA a few weeks now, and the ticket I bought to Cambodia has me departing on the 21st of this month, but I already know this will not be possible. Even though I bribed my way into a sponsor and got the stack of necessary documents, the Cambodian Embassy in Washington D.C. has refused my visa as of now, so after being stranded three years abroad with family, the fight is only just now beginning.
A handful of friends and family are all that know I'm back in the USA, as I honestly just don't feel like being around people right now, especially patriotic Americans who might say something about protecting the border. The other day somebody complained to me about Mexicans crossing the border illegally, and my response was "Good, I wouldn't wish the US immigration process on my worst enemy!"
Where I Stay & Free Tornado Wood 🌪️
I still have yet to see one of my fellow Americans prepare a meal where a knife and cutting board are involved, and everyone seems to take a handful of prescription drugs every day. On top of this, my welcome home has been a tornado-filled one, and it seems many people in nearby communities have died from the recent stormfront. I used the opportunity to pick up some downed tree limbs for a small evening fire.
The above house is where I'm staying while in the USA, a modular home which basically means a trailer that doesn't look like a trailer. I'm not complaining though, it's nice than any one-room apartment I could ever afford, and it's free cause it's on the family farm and unoccupied so I stay here despite there being zero economic opportunities around here.
Because this home is a modular, it means there is no basement, and that means I will go flying like Superman if a tornado greets me in the night while I'm sleeping. It may sound like I'm joking, but I personally know more than one person that was killed by a tornado while peacefully sleeping in bed.
My Borrowed Wheels 🚘
Well, here is my borrowed ride, a Jeep something or other, I guess it's nice to have a Dad that's a used car salesman. Well, if he was a new car salesman, perhaps the loaner I'd be driving wouldn't want to break my neck every time the transmission shifts gears. It's far too cold to even consider riding my Vespa in conditions like this, otherwise I would certainly do it save on petrol costs.
You know my last name is Parke, so my Dad couldn't avoid using it for a catchy business name, tastefully displayed on this custom front license plate that every car on the lot receives.
Material Things 🔥
I just miss family, and I want to be with them in Cambodia, and no probiotic drink or wireless microphone system can make me forget how much I want to be with them. I wish I was actually happy enough to talk about my fancy drink and microphone kit, but I really feel I'm running in auto-pilot mode.
Well, the world has gone mad, what can I do other than collect some sticks, make a small fire, and try to meditate on the madness of man? Three years stranded abroad, fighting for food, cash, running water, and much more, linguistically, socially, and culturally isolated, and now I am in the land of obesity where people get sad over their favorite sport team losing. I just can't get used to this, so I shall make more mini fires and continually try to google a way for me and my family to be together again.
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I am heart wrenched just imagining how you feel. It's so weird to see you guys separated. Yes the world has gone mad. There seems to be no justice but it has to show it's light at some point.
Keep lighting those fires.
It's been tougher on me than I expected. I guess for I feel as though this whole stranded-abroad Suriname thing is still ongoing. But somehow because I'm in the land where I was born everyone expects me to act normal, but somehow I still feel as though I'm in this invisible prison cell. I've chosen to stop being social because people inevitably ask about my family's story, I tell them the truth, then they always say something stupid and racist about the Mexican border and illegal migration. I then try to explain how affordable agricultural products and our way of life wouldn't exist in the USA without the exploitation of migrants and uneducated local day laborers.
After these exchanges I always feel physically and emotionally drained. Staring at a fire has proved one of the only ways to cope with the mentality of my fellow 'Mericans.
It's terrible to hear this news man. I really hope that you'll find some compassionate person in the Cambodian embassy soon. It is truly absurd to me that families are separated by things like this and I know lots of people back in Thailand that went through the same thing and eventually just left and brought their wife and kids to the States or wherever they hailed from.
I like your car and yes, it is fortunate to have a father that is in that industry.
On another note, I constantly tell people that I don't think I would handle rejoining USA society very well. I would prefer to live a simple yet not wealthy life in Asia than go back to the land of commercialism.
I really hope that your situation can change, and get back to your family in Cambo soon. They seriously won't let you have ANY visa at all?
It is absurd, and I like to test the humanity of these bureaucrats by calling on the phone and walking them through the three years of misery we've lived through and in a sense are still living through. I've never once heard a "sorry" or "I wish there was something I could do but my hands our tied" from any of these desk jockeys, whether from Ecuador, the USA, Cambodia, or Suriname.
I am glad to have a car at this time of the year, otherwise I'd be trapped at home in freezing temps miles from anything edible. I usually try to come during warmer weather so I can affordably get around vis my old Vespa. Whatever you do, don't come back here my man, you haven't made a major mistake yet.
I realize things aren't ideal for you in Vietnam, but it could easily get worse with a move elsewhere. Who knows, I may end up in Ha Tien or Phu Quoc to live cheaply while being close and ready for a Cambodian border crossing. Phu Quoc would be smarter for the international airport and because land borders are still technically closed.
I know several boat owners in Kampot/Kep that would smuggle my family to Phu Quoc if it proves we can't reunite legally in Cambodia anytime soon.
I wonder why it is that some of my friends are talking about their abilities to fly into Cambodia right now if you aren't allowed a visa. They must be mistaken because you have clearly done more homework on this than they have. The expat community here does a lot of bullshitting for the sake of conversation so that is probably the case.
I hear that Vietnam is pushing to re-open tourism asap so you may very well find yourself in this part of the world pretty soon. Maybe there are agents here that have a few tricks up their sleeves in regards to Cambodia that other parts of the world may not have access to based on proximity alone.
I certainly hope that someone does for your sake.
Well, the tourist visa is still available relatively hassle-free, but it can only be extended once and is dead after two months. The tourist visa was never before allowed to convert to a business visa, but it's possible this year until 2022. I looked into it, but one of the few agents able to do it said it's expensive and she can't guarantee it. She said the government is seeing to many Syrians, Afghanis, and Iraqis coming on tourist visas that they know don't plan on leaving.
The agent who could stand to make $400 off of helping convert the tourist visa recommended against me coming this way, and said I should try and secure a business visa from abroad if I don't want to take any risks and be sure that I can stay long-term when I come.
As of a few hours ago, I passed Cambodian visa pre-screening, and tomorrow I'll be sending my passport to D.C. for the Cambodians to hopefully glue something in there for me. Fingers crossed 🤞.
I've already heard your update about this process and it looks like things are looking up for you and this is great news. I hope nothing gets screwed up.
As far as an agent telling you no I have been down that road before and I tend to believe these guys because they have to go through a lot of work only to receive nothing at the end of it. Some more unscrupulous agents will still take some of your money if the visa fails and those, of course, are the ones to avoid.
Being in a place you don't want to be will put negative emotions into top gear, not being with family who now sound happy and settled makes you want to get there quicker.
Hopefully soon things start to open up that you can move again Justin.
One of the toughest things has been accepting that my family is thriving more without me in Cambodia than together in Suriname, so I must accept I've made the right choice for them even though they'd never admit they are better off there now despite being without me. I think the most important thing for the future of humanity is make sure my daughters understand what entities and belief systems are responsible for our now multiple separations. Hopefully this understanding will make sure they never support these systems and people, and perhaps even work to fight against politicians, borders, and bureaucracy.
Thanks for thinking of me.
So many hardships imposed on people through various avenues, it is better the girls learn about how many things affecting one in life. Hope you are all able to connect up soon.
Things are in the works now, hopefully 2022 is a year spent in Cambodia.
Hope you get there and are pleasantly surprised. Girls are all waiting!
My heart goes to you, Justin! I can imagine the feeling of emptiness whilst away from your family. Hope you get your way around this situation sooner.
I am hoping, praying, and also not waiting for any supernatural force to open this door for me. There is nothing I can do other than keep trying to legally open a door for reunification and keep shaming those who are keeping us apart and/or propping up the systems that keep us apart.
Let us hope for the best, spmething good is goong to happen
I do hope so, but I've also got years of reasons to not expect a positive outcome.
By reading your post, I can feel how much you missed your family.
I sincerely wish the best for you and your family. May the bureaucracy ended soon and ended well
Thanks to you and the ASEAN Hivers who are keeping me in good spirits lately. I don't know what I'd do without Hive right now because staring at a fire only works for so long to distract me from the burdens resting on my shoulders.
I really hope you can get that paperwork sorted before Christmas 😢
Meanwhile, when not googling and building fires, may I suggest digging a nice big fat hole by your door? It sounds like those tornadoes are just getting started :( ...
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As it stands now, the Cambodian Embassy hasn't contacted for me for days since my second attempt. On my first attempt they notified me within 24 hours that my documents were unacceptable. Now that US immigration is more-or-less dead, if Cambodia proves impossible, at least Monkey-B has a renewed passport, so if it must be that we need to find a new host country, they can fly to me.
Albania and Georgia seem to be the easiest countries where we could reunite at this time. I just hate to take them away from their country right now, especially since they've been away three years. Monkey-B left at a formative age and is now illiterate in Khmer, so she will have some major catching up to do if she's ever gonna learn to read and write the Khmer script.
Maybe after the girls have spent 6 months to a year in public school there, and are feeling back in touch with their culture, I'd might be selfish enough to ask them to join me abroad elsewhere. The best solution though is still for me to return to Cambodia, because this country is ultimately where I feel at home on Earth. Other than Cambodia, I've only ever experienced this feeling in Albania.
It looks like more than a hundred are dead from all the tornadoes that happened around me. I know a few people that lost their houses. I have no basement where I sleep, so night storm sirens are a very scary experience. I don't want this saga to end with me be tossed a kilometer from my bed in the middle of the night.
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May you and your family be happiness..
I hope this feeling of rage and frustration is replaced with happiness very soon.
On the 21st you leave for Cambodia, on the 22nd I will wait for Harry to come back to your post, because he is my idol hehehe
I haven't forgot, I still a little Harry content to share, just haven't got around to it yet to because of all the activity in ASEAN Hive lately. I won't be leaving on the 21st though, I have yet to secure a visa, so family reunification is just a question mark now.
Hi hi.. Justin.. that Jeep is pretty cool.. People in Brunei are really obsessed with Jeeps.. It is sad but really funny to read that the modular house gets blown away from a storm. In Malaysia, almost all houses have no basement. We have however, a store room instead. A room dedicated to stuff. Modular homes are not pinned to the ground?
Drugs to deal with illnesses? or just supplements? Everyone seems to do that?
Hopefully your visa gets approved soon. I think your family misses you very much while they are in Cambodia.
Modular homes are kind of attached to the foundation, but in a tornado are just as easily destroyed as mobile home, and I just happen to be here during tornado season, awesome!
Doctors earn additional income here form drug prescriptions, so advising patients on lifestyle changes does not earn them extra money, so no incentive to do things like this. The solution is always a pill. I like the NHS model in the UK, where doctors can get financial benefits from the health of their patients being exceptional, and I don't believe they earn additional income from writing prescriptions.
Thanks for remembering me at this time, it's nice knowing ASEAN Hivers are on our side.
Wow..I don't know if tornadoes are like what I would see in movies .. but I've never seen any tornadoes in real life before but I know they are pretty scary... From the way you described one.
Something new for me where docs would be issuing prescription drugs for patients because there is an incentive to do it. In Malaysia, docs are only paid a fix salary and these prescription drugs are subsidized by the government. 😁😁😁
I guess everything seems normal when you grow up around it. Tornadoes and incentives to sell pharmaceuticals seem absolutely mad to me now, but that's only because conversation with foreigners broadened my horizons. Don't get me started on the "bail bonds" industry, only the Philippines and the US still use this form of surety for the appearance of a defendant in court. In this system the poor are exponentially screwed.
Tornadoes during the daytime aren't too bad because you can see them from so far away. Tornadoes that occur at night move like a ninja and could kill you before you have a chance to hide. I've been through quite a few, and they are terrifying.
Praying for this not to happen!
Your dad is a very clever man. hahahha
I'm a bit sad for you, I know how much you miss your family. I hope and pray that soon you'll be able to fly to Cambodia. I hope they will let you take your flight and see your family again. For now, stay safe!
Oops, I forgot to add the word "lot" in between "the" and "receives," but you still understood anyways. Typo now fixed. My Dad is almost a local celebrity at this point, and it's funny too, I just saw my cousin's face on a major billboard at the side of the highway yesterday. I guess she's now very successful with real estate sales.
Thanks for stopping by, I do hope to hug my three ladies very soon.
I should definitely ask for an autograph if we get a chance to meet. ahhahaha
I have been thinking of you, when I read about the tornado in Kentucky. I feel there's a tornado going on in your mind right now and I get it. I wish you all the strength and energy that you need to get through this. You will make it...
Big hug, my friend.
A nice literary comparison, you are certainly right. Well, I guess I am lucky to not have been stabbed by a piece of wood then flown like Superman for a few seconds. As long as tornadoes and rednecks don't kill me, I'll continue fighting to be with my family.
So sorry to heard that sir. But I'm praying for the best for you in every ways. I felt you too. Be strong and don't give up. You still have us with you sir.
Thank you, that is actually very comforting. You all have been more supportive than any off-Hive friends or family. 🙏🙏🙏
Because you brought us here, guided us and support us. And now we want the for you once we heard it from you. Stay strong and don't give up sir. I believe you can make it through ❤️
🤞🙏
I can feel your longing with your ladies.
I feel so sad about it. How I wish you can still fly to Cambodia. 🙏🙏🙏
There is no good COVID or immigration reason my family and I shouldn't be together. But it is tough hoping and waiting for government for to relinquish a new power, it usually never happens, and I fear these new tougher international visa policies are here to stay. The world is now more closed than ever if you don't have an education, visa sponsors, and high-level job offers.
Life is like a wheel, It circles around. It is time for you to make better plan for the future. You do not need to hurry to something what you like. As in Javanese philosophy" Alon-alon asal kelakon". It means that you should take a slow pace so that you will reach the destination.
I agree with this philosophy, and although I am impatient, "haste makes waste" as we say in English. I just have to keep the pressure slow and steady until I wear someone down and they let my family reunite.
Hope you get to be with them soon and stay safe from those natural disasters! I can't imagine what you're going through right now, in a colder climate without your family by your side.
Stay safe!
It is tough, but at least it's a relief escaping Suriname. The lack of friends, fruit and vegetable variety, affordable transportation, and a stimulating environment was nearly impossible to cope with. At least my wife and kids now have all these things again, and I have one of them in the USA.
justinparke, I really hope that the current situation improves soon. I can tell it's really affected you. Try to be okay over there?
It's tough, but I've got to cope with it on my own or implode. People around hear don't want to hear me ramble, they want to talk about sports and weather.
Given that things are out of your hands at the moment, perhaps it's best to make the most of the situation, otherwise you will just be putting too much pressure on yourself and be unhappy all the time. Sreypov and the kids are back in their homeland so they are safe if not totally settled down yet, and at least you don't have to worry (too much) about them. Whilst you have your family, a free roof over your head (hopefully the tornado won't take it away) and a car for you to use. Not saying you should enjoy your time, but sometimes life takes us down a difficult path, you just have to ride the tide and pull through stronger.
You're totally right, I'm doing my best to roll with the punches. Hive is really proving one of the best distractions, even though now I only have half the time for Hive that I had in Suriname. This is due to everything in the USA being far. Even buying a banana means a half-hour commute one-way, and at least $5.00 in petrol. Arriving at the place to buy a banana is not nearly as simple as Cambodia. I have to park the car far away, spend minutes walking inside and outside the market, and only then can I enjoy a banana after spending nearly two hours and $5.00 for the chance.
And supposedly the western way of life is smart and efficient, I'm not convinced. One place I'd like to visit is the "Eugene Debs Museum", about an hour and a half from my house, located in Terre Haute, Indiana. If I get the chance to go, I'll definitely share with HaveYouBeenHere.
Babe I can just imagine how awful that is for you. Reverse culture shock is shitty especially when you've lived a life you have lived. x
It is brutal, and as you can see it's taken away my posting energy. This is the longest creative Hive drought I've ever had.
Never mind ... The new year is coming!!!!