The Rite Of Passage [Fiction]

avatar
(Edited)


Photo by Kellepics

Two strange things happened that day —my birthday, a day fated by the gods for me to discover my true identity, and a falsehood that lurked at the heart of my home.

The loud beat of the local drums in the early hours woke me up from a deep sleep where I dreamed of a weeping woman who called out to me from the recesses of a dark cave. I shivered from the cold morning air despite the beads of sweat on my face and chest.

It was still dark outside, the perfect time to gear up and sharpen my weapons in preparation for the hunt.

I couldn't shake off the gloomy memory of the strange dream. The cries of the mystery woman tore at my heart. I sharpened my sword forcefully.

It was my eighteenth birthday. The king decreed I had to prove myself as his first son and successor by bringing back the head of the beast that terrorised my village and prevented hunting in the deep part of the forest for some years.

This hunt was a rite of passage into manhood.

"Ah, the young king is up and busy," my best friend, Akpan, teased as he drew close to my hut. He held his sheathed long cutlass on his muscled shoulder. I continued with my task, my face grim and in no mood for his jokes.

"That look does not bode well. What is it, my man?" He asked. Before I could respond, a few boys from my age group joined us.

The sky was gradually lighting up when the queen came out of the palace first, already dressed in her fine royal regalia and adorned with beads on her hair, neck and hands. She smiled, her teeth white and in contrast with her smooth, dark skin.

My friends, except I, snapped to attention and bowed their heads in respect.

"My son, are you ready for your hunt?" She asked and gently placed her left hand on my heart area. I stared down at the hand. Her smile and the way she framed "my son" irritated me at that moment.

Being my stepmother, the queen and I were not really close but I'd learned to live in harmony with her since I was seven. I assumed the theatrics were for my father, the king, who followed behind her.

I stepped back from her touch and inclined my head in greetings to my father. He nodded in response.

"May the gods go with you, my son and may you come back victorious," the king said, his voice dark and commanding.

"Yes, your majesty!" The boys chorused as some male servants brought out the hounds. I shouted and led the boys and hounds in a race, the grounds trembling beneath our feet, as we ran into the forest.

We travelled into a deep part of the forest that was rarely visited because it was the abode of the fearsome beast. No one had seen this creature but the few hunters who had encountered it described it as gigantic and black with sharp teeth and fangs.

We spent all day scouring the forest for this terrifying beast. I was determined not to go home empty-handed. If we captured this creature, my age group would become men and the citizens would see me as a worthy king after my father stepped down. I dared not contemplate the consequences if we failed.

As we tread through the thick forest, dry twigs and branches breaking beneath our feet, the hounds began to bark ferociously. I spotted a blurry figure whizzing through the trees around us.

"Hold it!" I yelled.

A deep growling sound from up the trees made our hairs stand on end. Adrenaline was building up in us as sweat dripped down our faces.

"By the gods, I can't see anything," Akpan whispered harshly, as we glanced around the trees.

"Stand with me, boys!" I commanded. Immediately we formed a tight circle, our backs against each other so we were not left exposed or vulnerable on any side.

The growling continued and grew louder until a strange whirlwind out of nowhere blew and flung the boys and hounds around. They all lost consciousness.

Deadly silence settled on the thick forest. Even the birds went silent and the wind ceased. Fear gripped my heart. I almost dropped my sword and ran away.

Taking a defensive stance with my sword pointing forward, I bent and shook Akpan, trying to wake him up. Then something heavy dropped from the tree onto the ground, shaking the forest.

It was the fearsome creature, a beast, almost eight feet tall, huge and heavily muscled. It was hairy all over. It had a head full of sleek black hair like a woman and the face of a bull, with a pair of horns curved upwards.

I fell as the ground shook and scrambled to get up.

"Mfon," a whisper reached my ears. I froze and stared at the beast. Its eyes, a light tawny brown like that of a puma, stared back at me.

It was not possible. The voice was familiar, soft like my mother's.

"Mfon, it's me," the beast whispered and moved a little closer. How could a beast speak like a human?

"Stay back or I'll kill you!" I yelled, brandishing my sword. "Why do you pretend to be my mother? I'll have your head for this."

The beast stopped and gazed at me as I made my silly threats. "My boy, you know in your heart it's me. You were sent to kill me but I won't let that happen. Take me back with you to the palace. When your stepmother sees me, I will be me again."

I scoffed. "But my friends—"

"Your friends are well but asleep for a little while. I did not hurt them. I will never do that to you."

"How did this happen to you?" I asked and realised I was standing right in front of the creature. It was a magnetic pull —blood calling to blood.

"Uyai was my friend but coveted my throne. When I realised, it was too late. She bewitched your father and cursed me into the forest to never lay eyes on her again. There's a loophole. If she sees me, I'll be free and have my life back. Help me, my son."

"Oh mother, why didn't you tell me? I could have helped you."

The beast's shoulders shook as it chuckled. "You were merely seven. You couldn't lift a finger to save yourself. I had to protect you. Know that Uyai will not let you take the throne after your father steps down. Take me back to the palace now."

"But my friends…"

"They will find their way back to the palace. Let's hurry before it gets dark, for then I will lose my senses and attack you."

That was how I led the beast home in chains. Children, men and women sang songs of jubilation as they escorted me to the palace. It was the queen who stepped out of the palace first with her maids.

Seeing the face of the beast, she screamed in a voice loud and piercing, her hands pulling her hair as veins bulged on her neck.

Before the whole village, the beast transformed into my mother to everyone's amazement.

"Guards! Arrest her!" I shouted, alerting everyone to Uyai, my stepmother who was slowly transforming into a beast. I joined the guards to chain her and took her down to the dungeon.

The king was in shock for many days but I was happy to have my mother and our queen back.



0
0
0.000
39 comments
avatar

The young prince has successfully passed his rite of passage. From being a boy he has become a man who returned the true queen to his king and his people.
An interesting story full of fantasy, @kemmyb. Thanks for supporting our community.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you so much for reading and for your kind feedback. 🙂

0
0
0.000
avatar

Too much African Magic??😂😂😂

Such an Epic Yoruba-like tale 🔥✨

0
0
0.000
avatar

Dygggggggggg 🤣. It's an interesting one by the way but... which mortal without proper divination would dare take down a beast that huge? I'd definitely run for my life whether or not it sounds like anyone I know.🤣

0
0
0.000
avatar

POV: Beast calls out to me...

Stop.. I'm your mother....

Me, hearing it talk

untitled.gif

0
0
0.000
avatar

Exactly 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

0
0
0.000
avatar

I'd definitely run for my life...

Don't fall your king's hand o! 😂

If you had been trained as a hunter, you wouldn't fear, no matter how gigantic the beast is! 😄

0
0
0.000
avatar

Don't fall your king's hand o! 😂

He should have gone all by himself, I'd fall his hand again and again 🤣🤣🤣🤣💔

If you had been trained as a hunter, you wouldn't fear, no matter how gigantic the beast is!

Trained or not, fear is the worst beast and what happens when I can't defeat it? I forget everything and run🤣🤣🤣

0
0
0.000
avatar

Yoruba-like tale? 🤦🏽‍♀️😅 I was going for action-adventure in African setting. Thanks a lot for reading! !PIZZA

0
0
0.000
avatar

An interesting fantasy story. Full of magic. Finally his real mother has found her true form

0
0
0.000
avatar

Yes, she did! Thank you so much for reading. ☺️ !LADY

0
0
0.000
avatar

Surely, I am a super fan of African setting! I like your storyline at the same time. And your character development is noteworthy.
Nicely done friend!
Keep it up..

!PIZZA

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you for this lovely comment. I'm happy you like this story. 😊
!PIMP

0
0
0.000
avatar

It's actually your setting for me and I'm so intrigued. Was glued to the very last word. I do admire Akpan's bravery but TBH it can never be me. Let anyone who wants the throne have it. Imagine the beast wasn't his mother, just imagine!!! He'd have died a painful death and then someone somewhere would have to take the throne while he rots in the garage for trying to prove something 🤦.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Imagine the beast wasn't his mother, just imagine!!!

That would have been the end of Mfon! 😅 Still he needed to prove his manhood. Thank you so much for reading. Your comment is always a delight. !LUV 💕

0
0
0.000
avatar

That would have been the end of Mfon! 😅

You know it🤣💔

Thank you so much for reading. Your comment is always a delight

My pleasure ma'am 🥰

0
0
0.000
avatar

Dear lord. Such bravery.

So many lines in this story got the hair on my skin standing.

Imagine feeling this void of not having a mother all these years. Smh.

I love how the story developed with so much detail. It helped me to insert myself into every scene.

Excellent as usual.

Congratulations.

0
0
0.000
avatar

So many lines in this story got the hair on my skin standing.

😄 I must be getting better at writing spooky stories then. Hehe. Thanks for this lovely comment. Yours was equally fantastic!
!LADY

0
0
0.000
avatar

You've got it in you.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Nicely written, I didn’t anticipate the twist that the beast was his mother. I loved the beginning when you set the stage for everything but the end felt a little bit too rushed for me. Nevertheless, great story and concept!

0
0
0.000
avatar

....but the end felt a little bit too rushed for me.

I think so too after I read it again... especially the part where the protagonist talks with the beast, yes? Hehe. Duly noted. Thank you for your visit. !PIZZA

0
0
0.000
avatar

What a wildly imaginative and creative story, Kemmy! I loved it, truly. Well-paced, and intriguing, and I loved that the beast turned out to be his mother cast under a spell. That was a good twist! Well-earned recognition in the contest. !LUV !ALIVE !LADY

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you so much for the compliment and your kind words. It means a lot. 🥰
!LADY

0
0
0.000
avatar

Your story is fabulous, very well written, full of emotions and fantasy. For a moment I thought what if the beast is not his mother and is cheating on him?
But blood calls to blood and it was a very good ending.😉
Greetings @kemmyb

0
0
0.000
avatar

For a moment I thought what if the beast is not his mother

That would be disastrous! 😅 Thank you so much for reading and for your nice comment. 🙂 !LADY

0
0
0.000