HIVENAIJA WEEKLY PROMPT #09: Being a single parent

𝚂𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚕𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚘𝚗𝚎'𝚜 𝚍𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚛𝚎, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚜. 𝙳𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚞𝚜𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚗 𝚋𝚘𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚍𝚎𝚕𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙𝚏𝚞𝚕 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚕𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚗𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚐𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚙𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚒𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚑𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔-𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚕𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚑𝚢 𝚎𝚗𝚟𝚒𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚗.

pixabay

Single parent is not something any man or woman will ever wish for, it a part of life challenges that we never expect but just come. Being a single parent is not really easy because it will not be easy for one person to shoulder all the responsibilities that even two people are struggling to carry.

Regardless of the circumstances that led to single parenting it always have effect on both the parent and the children. Sometimes, unavoidable reasons causes single parent and most of the times the other party might decided not to be responsible which often lead to single parenting.

Managing a multiple role and responsibilities can be really overwhelming as a single parent but it is really important to know the important of self care and that is the first role you have as a single parent. Taking care of your emotions, mental health and physical appearance is really important in order to be able to support your children effectively.

It happens to one of my aunty, her husband left her for another woman three months after giving birth to their third born. At first she thought it was his usual habit that he will go and come back after some weeks or month but after six months till when the baby clocked one year they never see him and my aunty decided to face her children.

She try to stay strong but deep down, she was emotionally broken but with everything, she still acted strong. She was a teacher before her husband left her and the children but when she saw that the teaching job is not enough for her and her three children, she decided to leave the job and find a lucrative business to do in order to provide for her children.

With the help of her sister, she was able to start a business and also her sister help her to take care of her first born who is the only boy among them and she was left with the two girls and they are surviving without the husband.

It get to a point she fell sick and was advised to get admitted but no, she said she can't leave her children to suffer. All she care about was her children well being forgotten that her health is the most important thing in taking care of her children.

With the help of medications, she was living fine but it doesn't last long because she died before her first born even finish secondary school. After she died, her so call husband came for the children but the children denied him. That is why self care is really important.

Single parent is not something to be done alone, seeking a support from a close friend or family is allowed, sharing of experience and challenges with people who have once being in that shoes can be helpful because their empathy and advice can help to lessen the burden.

Setting up a routine and structure like the children regular meal time, when to can go to bed, and creating a balance between their education and leisure time can help the children stability.

Don't keep a secret from your children, be open with them with honesty because that will help them understand the change in the situation and the challenges they will face being train by a single parent.

Being a single parent is not a sin or a disease but a challenge that can face anyone. We just have to let our children be comfortable with us so that they can express their thoughts and concerns, given a listening ear to their needs and provide a guidance and reassurance when necessary, that is what being a single parent entail. I'm not one myself, but I learnt a lot from someone who happened to be a single mother and I was always proud of how well she train her kids even though it's not easy.

Thanks for checking on my blog and have a wonderful day