My self-care is important

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(Edited)


A few months ago I rang up an old friend to see how she was doing. We chit-chatted briefly and then she went on to tell me how flabbergasted she was to see a local former fashion model in her late 50s, sporting a full head of grey without makeup.

I was stirred by the comment, and my friend proceeded to show me a recent photo from the lady's social media.

I gasped when I saw the photo.

"Wow, she has grown. She knows herself and is comfortable in her skin. I guess she's gone through many phases and now wants to be her authentic self. Oh my, I'm so happy for her. That's so admirable, and kudos to her. She looks amazing." Was my candid emotional rant!

"Really Milly!" my friend exclaimed.

My friend was perplexed by my reaction, and I saw her trying to process it all. I went on further to tell my friend that I see the new image of the woman as a positive influence for younger girls who are all absorbed with the demands of social media-approved looks, and also for the more mature women who might be struggling with changes.

"I'm so happy about this conversation because that makes me see the woman in a different light," said my friend.

I pointed out to my friend that it's the same way people would probably see me and be completely shocked about my grooming because, for years, I never left my home without makeup. Nothing drastic, or elaborate, but just a matte finished look, which somehow made me more confident.

It's horrible to be judged by our natural appearance, isn't it?

My present skin condition and my daily look.


I have a few acne scars that are not so pronounced, so I'm not too concerned about covering them. It's not that I have an aversion to women wearing makeup, but focusing on skincare makes me less susceptible to skin conditions that I suffered from in the past. Without proper skincare, I'm prone to things like acne, eczema and vitiligo, which were all expensive to correct; under the proper guidance of using dermatology-prescribed products, which thankfully brought my skin back to a healthy state.

Beauty care for me is best when done holistically with a focus on our entire lifestyle and habits. I do not drink more than an occasional glass of red wine, neither do I smoke, and I try to get good sleep, as I know that lifestyle habits can alter the appearance of the skin.


There are noticeable signs of ageing in my skin; Nothing dramatic though apart from slightly looser skin above my eyes, and below my chin, which I think are the two problematic areas for most women over 40 years, and I think I'm doing okay at 47 years old.

However, for mature women like myself, particularly those who might not have to dress up for the office or public eye; It's important that we still maintain a good healthy self-care routine. One that starts from within, meaning what we eat, to what we apply or nurture our skin with, because we need sufficient moisture to maintain a supple appearance.


Imperfections don't bother me because what I see in the mirror goes far beyond my physical appearance, and I see a spiritual soul that makes me own every flaw. So, I like to look at my freshly washed face in the natural light by a window so I can observe the health of my skin.




My Skincare Routine.

"My daily activities involve spending time outdoors or doing activities such as yoga, where my face is exposed to dirt and grime, so cleansing and moisturising is important."

I have a combination skin type that leans more on the dryer side, so I need to use a mixture of water-based and oil-based products. Also, women who look like me are prone to hyper-pigmentation and discolouration, which can take years to correct, so a healthy regime using mild products is a good preventative measure.

Cleansing (water-based)

Moisturising (Oil-based)

Something that these products all have in common is that they contain natural and organic ingredients that are certified as environmentally safe, and are free from synthetic ingredients such as mineral oil.


Here's a lovely set from a New Zealand brand that's gentle and suitable for sensitive skin.


A full regime (done at least 3 times weekly, and a half regime that's done daily)

Part A (Cleansing)

(1) Micellar water (which doubles as a make-up remover for those who wear makeup) is applied using a cotton pad to remove excess dirt and oils, in a gentle circular motion.

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(2) I alternate between a foam cleanser or a gel cleanser that is soap-free and mild, which is applied in a gentle circular motion and then rinsed. This helps to remove excess dirt and oils that potentially clog pores and gives a deeper clean than that of the micellar water. This one says hydro-boost, which is highly nourishing.

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(3) A toner that helps to balance the pH of the skin for a healthy glow. This one which is about to finish is a Retinol-based one, however, I already have this glycolic one below as the replacement.

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I like to alternate between the two for different functions.


Part B (Moisturising)

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(4) Here is where I use an ampoule with a few drops of hyaluronic acid, that works well for my skin as it seals in moisture which improves the feel, texture and elasticity of my skin.

(5) A face oil. I love these. My friend sent me this one from New Zealand which is turmeric oil, good for achieving an even skin tone.


(6) A light easily absorbing serum that seals the moisture.


(7) This moisturiser absorbs well into the skin and does not leave a film coating on the skin. It's a highly trusted brand here in the UK, and it doubles as a sun protection for me.


This might seem like a lot of steps and a lot of products, however, I use them sparingly, as a little goes a long way. Just a little drop of each and my face remains clean and clear, with the confidence to go without makeup.


With all these steps, I eliminate the exfoliation because my skin is sensitive and I try not to irritate it. An alternative for me is to use this silicone face brush that's not abrasive while using the foam cleanser.



For a Half Routine (Fewer Steps and also more suitable in the summertime or hot humid climates)

I do:

(1) Micellar water cleansing with a cotton pad
(2) Toner with a cotton pad
(3) Hyaluronic Acid
(4) Moisturiser and sunscreen

With this rigid routine, I can keep acne pimples away even during my time of the month when I tend to get the odd pimple.

Overall, I think it's important to figure out one's skin type and use products that are specific to it. I do not have specific brands, because I tend to focus more on each ingredient. Also, I only purchase my cosmetics from outlets like TK Maxx, which offers quality for less.

My reasons for dedicating time to proper skincare are that I feel better about myself when my skin is clean and clearer than when I neglect it and develop conditions like eczema and acne. Also, this helps to boost inner confidence so that I do not rely on the approval of others.

Do you think there's a particular age that's too early to start having a conscious skincare routine, or do you think that products and procedures are developing constantly that could be used for cosmetic enhancement?

Screenshot 2023-06-15 at 11.42.23.png

All images are mine and the cover photo was edited in Canva



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31 comments
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I love the response to your friend! Too much attention is placed on women's appearance and not enough on their hearts and minds! Bravo for standing up for your sisters, especially the "more mature" of us! 💗

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Thank you 😊
I was surprised by the remark, especially since it was public knowledge that the woman's rug had been pulled from under her feet. For me, I saw such a glow in the woman's eyes that made me melt, and she was the same attractive person that I knew many years ago.
We women need to celebrate others more because society is stacked against us with the constant reminder of a "limit on our age of relevance." 💗

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I haven't tried using glycolic acid. Maybe I should add that to my skincare routine. Back in the Philippines, I was fine to use Dove soap on my face and I wouldn't say I liked wearing a sunblock cream. Now that I am in Europe, I was baffled about which products to use and had no idea what hyaluronic acid was. I've been reading about retinol but I don't know how to use it and not even safe for breastfeeding mamas.

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I know that it can be challenging to find the right products when you move overseas. When I moved back to the UK, it took me a while to find the ones that I liked.
In the Philippines, I loved Derma E, from Healthy Options and I needed to find something comparable here. I was recommended the Weleda moisturiser and the rest, are whatever brand I find at a good price. I think it's best to figure out what steps are vital for your skin.
Any Micellar water should be fine CeraVe is great natural brand that I think can be easily found in France. My toners are all from Aldi supermarket because they work fine and are affordable.

I love those Japanese stores in Ayala and SM. I always stock up on products from them whenever I visited Cebu:)

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Yeah, I remember Miniso and Daiso. They have skincare products and accessories but at that time, I never understood how to use them. Right now, I found the Inkeylist products. I will try to blog about it. I am interested in buying Cerave moisturizing cream soon once my current cream is finished. XD I just can't afford to buy La Roche Posay brands. hehe.

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Yeah, Miniso and Daiso were my fav and Healthy Options too. My husband knew the shops I visited when I went to the mall.
I was trying to remember the La Roche Posay brand. Yes, it's expensive unless you buy it from a store that's the equivalent of TK Maxx.
I think you'll meet some other Filipinos who will show you the ropes and suggest cheap places to shop.
You never know, maybe check YouTube and see what bloggers have to say about cheap shops 🤔

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Here in the pharmacy, so many French skincare products to choose from including La Roche Posay. XD I am just having a hard time reading French. hehe. But my sister-in-law told me not to buy the said product. It's better to use the affordable pricing of skin care products.

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Your sister-in-law is absolutely right. Don't buy the expensive ones from the pharmacy. Maybe do some research on cheaper brands at supermarkets and see how you get on with them:)

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I have a Filipino friend who lived in France for a while. I'll ask her for some recommendations:)

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That would be great. Currently, I am using the Inkeylist products but I haven't tried other products yet.

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You are so beautiful, I love it when you smile too, and I noticed you have a dimple when you smile ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ.

Anyways, having this kind of routine to have a healthier skin is good, I actually want to start mine already but I often feel like it will be too much work for me. Tbh, I can't relate much here as I don't have any idea about toner or that Hyaluronic Acid. I am so stupid when it comes to that kind of things tbh. I only remember using a cleanser and cream before, highschool days and that's the skincare I used and I know till now. But I think what J really need now was a cleanser for blackheads and whiteheads (≧▽≦), I'm not sure where to start my goodness. My dark circle is also my biggest problem now.

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(Edited)

Thank you 😊
I think once you get into a habit of taking care of your skin, you'll realise that it's not as daunting as it sounds in terms of time. I can do all this in 5 minutes or if it's the weekend and I want to be more diligent, then I could do it in 15 minutes and include a face massage and face yoga. It feels good and over time you'll start to notice the benefits.

Some people skip using toners, but a mild one without alcohol works well for me. I think Hyaluronic Acid is relatively new on the market within the last 10 years, but it's a mild ingredient that helps me to prevent the scaly dry skin that I used to have from eczema.

Overall, I think if you have normal skin with no skin conditioner, regular cleansing and moisturising (for you, sun protection since you are in the tropics) should be fine. Consistency is key and it's never good to skip cleaning or to not remove makeup if you do wear it:)))

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(Edited)

Loved your reply. Couldn't agree more. We women must "unlearn" some toxic attitudes towards our own sex. Beauty is a whole; besides, a woman is beautiful in different ways throughout her life. Young girls with all the makeup they don't need, hehe... that's kind of beautiful as well. We know we were so beautiful many years ago; right now we're beautiful, too. We'll see that better in some years. No doubt.

About your skincare, I can see you have it covered: right cleansing, moisturizer, antiaging, and nutrition.
I don't use retinol, but I use tetrinoin (an acid form of vitamin A; I buy it as Betarretin). Sunscreen is vital for me because we're being cooked alive here.

You look beautiful, btw. Your smiling face is 💯 charming!


Do you think it's too early to start having a conscious skincare routine, or do you think that products and procedures are developing constantly that could be used for cosmetic enhancement?

Dermatologists say a little before we turn 30 is the right moment to start using antiaging and nutrition. Before that, sunscreen. Moisturizer for dry skin.We stop producing GH at 30; that's why.

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I appreciate your compliments 😊

We women must "unlearn" some toxic attitudes towards our sex.

That's so true!

What I realised since writing this, is that my friend might be going through some difficulty with the changes in her looks. She's older than me, but just last week she messaged me and the conversation was very short. BUT! She asked, "How old are you now?" When I told her, she said "You're getting OLD Milly." I didn't think anything of it and I smiled inwardly because getting old is something that I'm grateful about. However, now when I reflect on it, that's a little odd, and maybe I should reach out to her in some way. Hmm...

Besides, a woman is beautiful in different ways throughout her life.

I strongly believe that too.

Young girls with all the makeup they don't need

I was that girl!

One day in the Philippines, one of the staff turned to me and asked, "Why do you wear makeup?" I was shocked and jokingly replied, "Cos I don't want to look like a dog." She said you are beautiful already and you shouldn't wear makeup. I kept batting my eyelids, and I thought about it for a long time. Now, I honestly feel better natural with a little lipstick which I think is feminine.

Little before we turn 30 is the right moment to start using antiaging and nutrition. Before that, sunscreen. Moisturizer for dry skin. We stop producing GH at 30

🖕That sounds spot on to me.

I thank you for stopping by!
Have a great weekend:)))

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Makeup is still my friend; I only wear a little: most of the time, face powder to cover the oily sheen left by my sunscreen and a little lipstick.
But I'm comfortable about going out without it anytime.

I think these topics are most relevant. Makeup is somehow a mask, so we must be careful about not destroying our self-esteem.
(We do wear invisible masks all the time, though: ego, persona; call it appearance).

Thank you, @millycf1976 🤍

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Makeup is somehow a mask, so we must be careful about not destroying our self-esteem.

This might sound harsh or odd to some people, but it is a sad fact.

I always admire how fresh-faced you look in your photos. Your skin is like butter and I think your mindset and positivity have a lot to do with your healthy vibrant glow 😍

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Ah, that's so sweet of you. Thank you! I'm lucky that my dark circles are a little shy when it comes to photos,hehe. Dark circles make us look tired, but as I was born with them, I'm used to them. I still love makeup but only for specific occasions, and it's always much more light and simple than the average here in Venezuela, where many women wear makeup even to go grocery shopping 😂

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I hope it doesn't sound like flattery when I compliment how extremely beautiful you look. You take black don't crack to extremes and I'm so glad to see how you've maintained your beautiful skin to give out this pretty glow.
I kind of feel like I'm doing less seeing the things you do to ensure the texture of your skin but I'm willing to try, especially since I also don't use make-up. Love it for you, girl.🥰

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Thank you so much Jhymi 😊

I think you should stick to what you're doing if it's working for your skin. What I think though, is that being in the hot climate, you should invest in purchasing good sunscreen and removing it at night so it doesn't clog your pores.
From your profile, your skin looks healthy and you are at an advantage of not wearing makeup.

It's interesting that you can see the natural glow, yet people who are used to my old look, only see my new look as a cause for concern.
It's a good thing that I don't absorb verbal bashing 😆

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