Looking for balance



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Looking for balance

In this week's proposal, @galenkp invites us, among other questions, to answer:

Do you prioritize more your relationships or your career?

I consider it a very interesting existential question and before I answer it, I would like to talk a little bit about the history that precedes this current moment of life.

Before my first child was born, I was a total workaholic, fully dedicated to my career and also with a strong focus on “being productive” because I had set out to meet certain goals I wanted before I reached 30 years old.

So, from the time I was 21 until I was 29 I worked tirelessly, and as a result of all that effort I made with my partner at the time (now my ex-husband), we managed in less than 8 years to buy our apartment, vehicles, and other material goals. Along with these material rewards, we had a career on the rise, as we worked so hard in what we did in our jobs we were promoted very quickly and before we were 30 years old we had already held management positions while we were still very young.

Just when I was 30 years old, Miguel was born, and with him our whole world changed, our priorities were no longer material, but to make room for a new member in the family who undoubtedly came to move the floor of everything we had built.

We began to regret being so committed to work because in that new family dynamic, we required time at home, and more free time with our baby, and as corporations were not getting from us the same productivity as before, things began to get complicated at the work level.


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Our marriage collapsed, and while it is true that this was not the only reason, or perhaps not even the trigger for the divorce, I feel that being so workaholic in our early years of marriage kept us from laying a solid emotional foundation that would allow us to overcome being more consolidated as a couple to overcome adversity together.

In the midst of the chaotic situation of the divorce, some “colleagues” at my work began to take advantage of my moment of distraction to throw away all my years of work. I realized there was no point in having been so productive and efficient if at the slightest hint of personal problems they turned their backs on me. I also experienced loneliness and isolated myself for many years.

Throughout this process I realized that I did not have my priorities clear, that I had been pointing to a north that in reality would not lead me to success but to a path paved with suffering, that although the career or job should occupy an important place in the life of any person because it leads to self-fulfillment, it should not steal time in other important areas of your life.

Thus began my search for balance in my life, that point of equilibrium that allowed me to begin to value more the people around me who truly esteem and support me, I really met those who are my friends, I became more present in my family and as incredible as it may sound, I became more present in myself.

Today I see that level of evolution and I am very happy to see that you can change your paradigms at any time, paradoxically the change of priorities did not make me neglect my work, I am still equally busy in giving the best of me in my profession, I keep myself constantly studying and trying to be very competent in my work area, only now my attention is not focused 100% on it but in the proportion that corresponds to it.

And although I am still looking for balance because I would like to have more time available for myself, I can say today that my life has changed a lot.

Thank you @galenkp for this proposal. I invite @rosahidalgo and @charjaim to participate.

If you want to read all of this weekend's questions, access this link and follow the posting rules:

Weekend-Engagement topics: WEEK 203

Blessings and good vibes to all. See you soon!

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Understanding how to balance things is an important skill in life. Prioritizing work might be easier before having a family. Once children are born, responsibility takes precedent and taking care of them becomes more important.

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Absolutely! It absolutely changes the priorities and also the way of seeing the world. You value life in a different way and you have other, more gratifying satisfactions ❤️

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Finding balance can be complicated and is a path to be conquered on a day-to-day basis and to dedicate time to oneself as well. That's true, but it can be done. A big hug!❤️

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Prioritizing space for oneself is very important in these times to maintain a positive balance and be at peace. Sometimes we let ourselves get overwhelmed with so many tasks and responsibilities and forget the importance of maintaining our spaces.A big hug 🤗

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I totally agree, and it is important to find that space. Hugs!

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I believe that there are stages in life for everything, and although the balance must be seen from every point of view, because in addition to the children the family also needs us, when we are young and we are very motivated by work we do not even realize what is happening and it seems so normal that you want to give everything until you end up leaving life itself aside.

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Very interesting, lives always have cultural parameters and we believe that this is the manual to follow, but as time goes by we realize that it is more particular than we think. My priorities are influenced by how I feel, I work the way I want and I am no longer thinking so much about having, but about what the plan gives me. I take care of my relationships, I am not extreme with this, but I always have to take care of my wellbeing so much that I think I am very busy with it. Thank you for your post, it got me reflecting on where I am, I appreciate you and know you better. @miriannalis

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