Childhood friend lost

Making friends during childhood was easier and more straightforward than for adults. Those bonds formed during childhood seemed so special because they were the purest. Children possess a different filtering system to adults when choosing friends. If childhood friendships last, then we have people that really know and understand us in the true sense. On the other hand, these childhood friendships can also drift apart and that can be for so many reasons. One of the primary reasons is that parents can make decisions to move away and a child has no say in the matter.

This is what happened to me – we moved away from my neighbor and friend, Sylvia. She was one of my first memories of a good friend. I think I first met her when we were 4 years old. We did not live next door for long, but our friendship was special. My siblings and I were close to her siblings because we were close in age.

I can still remember our dolls, doll house and a tea set. We drank so many cups of tea until we needed larger cups. Since we were full of creativity, we ventured outside – dug up the earth and made our own larger clay teacups and saucers. We were very impressed by our pottery and the fact that it held together. We only drank make-believe tea from those cups but if you were in earshot of our tea parties, you would believe that we were really enjoying tea with cake, due to our delight.

At a certain point, my parents moved us to the city. My siblings and I were miserable. It was quiet a drama. We would all miss our best friends and the entire family. There was some consolation; we would still see our friends during the summer holidays when we visited our grandparents. Sylvia and I would just simply catch up where we left off.

As we grew older, our summertime activities changed. We became more involved with our local friends and life in the city. I still saw Sylvia briefly during out Christmas visits to our grandparents. We were so alike and always had so much to share with each other. That did not change.

Unfortunately, my parent decided to move again but this it was time overseas. Sylvia and I discussed writing each other letters but I am not sure what happened - I do not recall that we ever corresponded. We thought we would be friends forever, now we had totally lost contact. At first, I missed seeing her but then later as a teenager, I made other friends and I figured that I would see her when I visited my grandparents. Unfortunately, when I visited, she was away at boarding school.

Much later I heard that she emigrated. Despite that I have always felt certain that if it is meant to be - we will meet again. With social media and our world being so connected, I think surely our paths will cross again.

Now we are adults and every so often I still think about Sylvia and my childhood. Actually, this prompt brought back so many memories that I called my brother. We reminisced about our friendship with family and wondered where in the world they are and what are they doing.

My brother and I spoke about high school reunions where we met people whom we used to like and now we did not enjoy their company as adults. Would this happen to Sylvia and me? I do not know. I know it is possible that our lives took different paths and that we developed in totally different ways as adults. The connection we had as children could now be non-existent after what seems like almost a lifetime apart. However, we still have those early years in common even if we have nothing else in common. As adults we find friends that are aligned with our ways of thinking and living. Life happened and Sylvia and I grew away from each other literally - so anything is possible.

I am sure that we have changed and that is normal. It is inevitable that children grow and develop their personalities during the teenage years. During the university years, we seems to find ourselves and create new friendships. Sometimes we totally abandon our childhood and high school friends as we develop new interests.

It might be wishful thinking but somehow I think that if we were to meet again it will be a glorious meeting. We would be so happy to see each other – the excitement would be palpable. We would not be able to contain ourselves. We would have so many stories to tell about our lives that we would need more than just hours to share everything. The reason I think like this is because stories from of our past will trigger only pleasant memories. That will be a good start. These memories are ones that we can never change and they will always be there and will remain special - no matter what happens to us as adults.

I’ve moved a lot throughout my life and I learnt how to be adaptable and to make new friends after every move. Even new friends change, so meeting a childhood friend who’s changed would be understandable. It can happen that the qualities that we appreciated when we were young are now different from what we would like to see in friends now that we are adults. I would like to believe that if I met Sylvia again – after the trip down memory lane we would discover that as adults that we do have things in common. We will make new connections and become friends again in this phase of our lives.

Having friends from childhood is something to cherish that familiarity and coziness cannot be replicated due to the shared experiences.

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The post is in response to Hive Learners prompt - #hl-w63e1

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The photo is my own