African Culture & Gender Differences

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Gender matters is as old as mankind. The history date back to as far as to the time of my ancestors, those I haven't heard of. As an African child, one cannot overemphasise the truth that make children are considered higher than the females.

One of the excuses given by our grandparents for opposing the birth of female children is that when the girls grow up and take husbands, they would begin to bear the name of their husbands, thereby, all efforts put on them by their parents is wasted. This was the mindset of our parents and their parents parents.

In some parlance, that belief still holds sway. Female children are not given the adequate support they need to secure a better and brighter future. Rather, most family resources are spent on the male child whom they believe would carry on the family history and also pass it down to his own children.

My Experince With Gender Discrimination

As an in-law in a family where there are six girls and one boy, I had to make my in-laws understand the importance of given the same opportunities they would give to their male children to the females too.

My father-in-law was highly expectant if a male child. With his wife, they did not get any after seven pregnancy. The first set of children they gave birth to we're all girls. And the reason why they kept giving birth was because they were in dire need of a male child, following the ideals of the African belief of the relevance of the make child. Six whooping children.

Recently, after ten years of marriage, my sister-in-law had to confront me that I did not allow my wife, her sister to spend special holidays with them. I was shocked and taken aback because to me, my wife has a huge role to play in my immediate family cycle during special holidays like Christmas, new year and even easter festivities.

My response to her was that she will not understand until she gets married. Whereas, her argument was that each special holiday their sister who is my wife doesn't come home, they usually feel incomplete.

Since there only brother is still very young and schooling, it became necessary that sometimes I would go to visit my in-laws with my family (my wife inclusive). My aim was to take the opportunity to convince my father in-law to equip his daughters with all he could muster for a better tomorrow.

Breaking The Jinx

I earned my respect and honor with my in-laws. My father in-law was proud of me each time I come visiting. He would ensure that we'l were together always, talking about life generally and what it ought to be.

Once in a while, I would bring in events around the globe where women are doing better than men. The case of the current chairperson of the World Trade Organization, Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala was considered. I sighted the case of Hellen John Sirleaf who was the first female president in Africa from Liberia. As I spoke, he nodded in agreement.

I went as far as telling him that in fact, the female gender because of their soft heartedness would remember to reach out to their parents even as they have been married than their make children. But all that will come to pass if they are educated.

This singular discussion yielded a positive result as my father-in-law decided to sponsor his female children to the higher institution. Today, his fears have been allayed. All six daughters are not graduates with good jobs and have been very supportive to their parents. Whereas, the only son just got admission to a university.

To say the least, one can see that his inner eyes have been circumcised from the lies that female children will amount to nothing. I am happy that I was able to bring him of that confusion.