Reality Check
I just read @jhymi’s post a few minutes ago about how she got called out by her teacher in junior high which I think wasn’t done in the right way. This all went don’t because our girl is a perfectionist. I could relate so much to her story so I decided to share mine.
A few weeks ago, it hit me that I’ve been a perfectionist for literally my whole life and I only came to terms with it then.
Looking back to when I was in primary school, anyone who dared step on my polished black shoe and white socks would have to wipe it clean. I didn’t care who it was , just know you were going to clean my shoe if you stepped on me so the best thing to do was to walk well. Funny enough, I started the whole shoe cleaning thing in my school and within a few days, everyone was doing same. With time, my mates started to avoid being rowdy and everything was in order which meant no more students running around and no one stepping on my shoe.
In senior high school, during those days we had something called ‘dumsor’ which translates into turn it off and on. Basically, we had power outages almost everyday and we even got a calendar for days when we would have light and days we wouldn’t. Poor me wouldn’t want to go to school on days we didn’t have light because that meant my uniform wouldn’t be ironed and I couldn’t show up looking like a clown.😂
To make myself feel happy about my uniform looking presentable, I would lay it down under my bedsheet the night before and by morning it would be looking as ironed as ever. On nights like this, I made sure to not roll too much during the night.😂
Fast forward to university, my roommates in first year started to call me ‘madam gold’ because I always complained about any little dirt around. We had a shared kitchen for the whole floor and you can imagine how the place looked after some people used it. On days when I want to use the kitchen, I would sweep the whole kitchen which wasn’t small at all before bringing my stuff to cook and I would sweep after cooking.😂 the funny part is I was just using a little space in the kitchen. I just didn’t like to see dirt around especially when it was in a kitchen. After, I would go to my room and complain to my roommates about how my back hurts.😂
I also had so many other experiences with my friends on campus. I would complain if you were eating a bit too loud cos I didn’t like the sound. I would scold you if you forgot to comb your hair and then I would comb it for you. If you didn’t iron your clothes, you’d hear from me too. Looking back, I think they would have taken it in a bad way but I actually didn’t mean to make my friends feel stupid , I was just looking out for them because I wanted them to be perfect no matter what because I was constantly pushing myself to be better.
A while back, say two weeks, I got into a huge fight with someone close to me and it was really bad. It all happened because I was complaining about literally everything they did. I didn’t see it as complaining, I was just trying to get them to do the right thing. I think this habit of mine had been going on for so long and that day was the breaking point for this person and we got into a huge fight.
We didn’t speak for over a week and what I was told was take time to think of your actions. I didn’t take it too seriously and I felt they were just being dramatic but during the week it hit me. Maybe I was asking for too much. Maybe I just needed them to be perfect so much that they just couldn’t be themselves. Slowly, it all dawned on me. I was pushing my perfectionist character on others. Trying to make them be like me or even better and that was wrong. So, I learnt to accept people for who they are because God knows I’m never going to be 100% okay with what everyone does. For someone who makes sure her tiles are sparkling clean when mopping, I sure do have high standards.
Now, I have come to learn more about myself and I know not to impose stuff on people. Just allow them be but don’t fail to correct them when they go wrong. If I know I wouldn’t like how they do something I ask of them, why not do it myself. That’s more of a better way to maintain the peace and quiet.
So, this is my story. I don’t think I’ve met anyone like myself, maybe I’m yet to. lol.
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Ahhhh if someone steps on your shoe they’ll clean it?
Then if we ever met that Nbs fight o🤣
Because I was troublesome paaa😂😂
Wait, is it the kitchen I think you’re talking about?🤣
Me I even stopped cooking there in the end because ahh what’s all this😂
Like I will beat you and report you to our teacher after.😅😭
Navro hall kitchen deir not not.😂 you will even prepare your stew and someone will come and remove the meat.
Eyy how ?
Your meat got missing?😂
Not me, like there will be war.😅
I thought I was a perfectionist but Weldon ma. I greet u specifically ma 😊.
It is good to be clean infact it's the right thing to do,but let's not impose it in others. Thank you 😊
Go down well and greet me.😂😂😂
That’s right. Sometimes others feel stupid when we do these stuff but we really mean no harm.
The part of fight caught my attention.
Do you mean real fight? I mean, throw of blows and slaps sounding like claps in a football arena?
If that's the case, who won the show?
Please please, don't come and tell me it's you. Be honest 🤣
All those your habits, I had and still have some of them. I hate to see or hear someone eating aloud. Gosh, it disturbs my ear like a mosquito sound 🤣
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Ha! I don’t even know how to fight.😂😂 fight as in word of mouth but not harsh.
It’s like you want to burst the persons mouth but controlllll😂😂😂
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Is better to walk with your eyes open than to step on your clean shoes to avoid trouble, I hope you are not troublesome again
I’m a bit less troublesome now. Haha😅
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Ei Ei. It’s a good thing we never had to cross paths in school cause I can’t even keep all my clothes at one place. This one de3, everyday fight oo or we will just stop talking.
But I admire you people. Always doing things in order.
I only have one friend that her room is always in order. The rest of us, it’s the same car that brought us😂😂😂
😂😂we won’t stop talking. I’d just get fed up of you and start doing your stuff for you. That’s how my room mate used to take advantage of me.😂
She would come to school after vacation and just dump her bags. She knows I’ll complain eventually so once I do, she will tell me she’s tired so I should pack her clothes in her wardrobe for her since I’m madam gold and I’d do it cos I don’t like messy places.😂
Please join our car okay.😂
Oh this is nice. She must have felt like a princess. 😂😂
She did 😂
Don't ever come to the US, as a society we have mostly given up on ironing clothes, LMAO. I mean, I have an iron, but I don't use it often, and some people don't even own one. 😂
I remember I was watching this Japanese vlogger I follow who is more like you - everything is perfect in her apartment - and one video she was ironing her jeans. I was like, ironing JEANS???!?!! 😂
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Funny enough, I also iron my jeans.😂😂 hell, everything I wear needs to be ironed down to the core. I just can’t help it.
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Always giving yourself stress 😃😃 I did this so many times too just to look good on my ironed dresses.
Hahaha. I guess you and my aunt are the same — always the perfectionist. The truth is, these kinds of people want others to be like them, they find any little thing offensive and would want to vent all their angers on them. They don't rest oo 😀😀 everything they do or are, they want others to do too and be like them which isn't possible. We all are different and you cannot do it right in other's face. They'd think it otherwise even when you think it's right.
The best is just to do it yourself when you find a little fault to make peace reign or else, what happened to you and your friend will keep on going. People like the perfectionists needs to understand humans and we can never act the same.
Honestly, sometimes at the end of the day I feel so exhausted because I always look for problems for myself.😂😂 even if something so in the right place I would go and now clean it and position it well. Ha!
Now I know to let people be themselves just like they do to me.
Thanks for passing by. ❤️
It's just always stress for people like that. My aunt doesn't rest. I have never seen her saying she wants to sit down and rest for some while unless it's night time when she is about to sleep. Always looking for what to do 😅😅
😂😂😂tell her to rest.
I wish I was with you then because I will be stepping in your shoe everyday, I was so rough during school, I never appreciated good thing, hahahahah hahahahah my mom was always calling me pig, I never knew I will become whom I am today as to cleanniness.
I love your type
Like we would always fight and you’d always have to clean my shoes.😂
Haaa so the shoes must be clean hahahahah
Exactly.😅
Hahaha
Oh a perfectionist indeed.
Imagine a senior student stepping on your toes you ask him/her to clean your shoes🤣. If it same secondary school I went to sorry is your name.
You will mop the whole hostel that day.
Cleanliness is next to Godliness. honestly, we have to embrace cleanliness
I’m very stubborn and I won’t allow anyone bully me.😂
Atleast you learned this issue you have now and are willing to correct it or tone it down, its a great thing!!
Yess... no one can be perfect and we have to accept them for what they are with all their imperfections...
Long ago, I had broken up my engagegement because smeone cannot accept me for what I am and wanted me to change which is not practical actually.
But that fellow never accepted that, but you have accepted your issue, its very healthy and I like the tone of non-seriousness here, there is a lot of self awareness and maturity I see here...
I’m sorry to hear about your engagement. Sometimes it’s best to not ignore the red flags if not we are putting ourselves in trouble.
If someone can’t accept us for who we are, then they don’t deserve us at all. Not in the slightest bit.