What To Write About When I Have Nothing To Write About

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(Edited)

Welcome to the words you are now reading.  Today is a day like no other and you've suddenly found yourself in a mess you will not be able to get out of.

What do you do?

The answer to that is simple.

Welcome

My name is Not Important Right-Now and I'll be your spirit guide.

Today I hope to achieve three things:

  1. Wake up
  2. Take a coffee break
  3. Finish this article

So now that I have a plan, let's finally begin.

I've decided to prove to the world once again I'm capable of writing another article successfully.

So far, the biggest hurdle has been deciding what the hell this article is supposed to be about.

After about ten minutes of just looking at this editor screen, I nearly gave up.  Then something went off in my head resembling a sound I could smell.  Confused, I started sorting through my available memories, checking to see which one I lost this time.

Several hours later I discovered I had been wasting my time for several hours.

Again...

After spending many years burning the candle at both ends attempting to live a full life all while writing and producing digital art for a side life online — with a few breaks of course to live away from the public spotlight and recuperateI've discovered my brain has turned to mush, permanently, but it feels great.

Those Youtube videos designed to put one to sleep while hypnotizing them to the point of waking up and only wanting to be successful should come with more warnings.  Simply avoiding operating heavy machinery while sleeping, though on the surface sounds like something people should say, isn't really covering all the bases.

First of all: How was I supposed to know it was actually going to work?

Never, not once, at all, did I think some soothing voice and peculiar music that sounded like the stuff in the elevator leading to that secret pharmahuasca session I'm not supposed to talk about, would change my life.

I mean, I've been exposed to the same brainwash everyone else is on and that didn't work.  So I thought I was invincible but nope.  Totally screwed.  Can't fail even if I tried.

Look at this article.

Stop reading and look at it.

Noticing something seems to be a little off-kilter?  Well I don't.

Because of that armchair hypnotist, I think what I'm doing is merely the road to success and this is just a normal day.  I could switch gears and make this article all about smearing myself with butter then asking the locals if they'd like to rub their bread on me for a dollar.  Readers might become confused but in my head I know exactly what I'm doing so there's no possible way this could go wrong.

Look at this digital art stuff I made a long time ago:

NoNamesLeftToUse - Magic Explanation.jpeg


NoNamesLeftToUse - Idea.jpeg


NoNamesLeftToUse - Animal Salad.jpeg


NoNamesLeftToUse - Meanchester.jpeg

Nobody even stepped up to tell me I was crazy!

They were applauding this madness...

And all I could think about at the time was, "How did this Youtube video that managed to hypnotize me, hypnotize everyone else as well..."

Eventually you get used to it.

A few months ago while in a hurry to get somewhere, this nice lady with a gun started honking at me with a really cool horn so I pulled over to see if that would make it stop.  Next thing I know she's complimenting my skills and even asked for an autograph.  It was so inspiring I now feel like donating even more money to the government so others can have nice things and be treated just as fairly.

Another recent successful day involved simply stepping off the bus since that nice lady decided to keep my license safe so I don't lose it.  Just planting my feet on that concrete is always a healthy reminder of how good things are going for me.

Then I could smell Burger King so I started looking around to make sure this was real because wow!  It's been awhile since I had Burger King and how did he know I haven't had breakfast yet.

There it was!

Fully equipped with a convenient glass door that actually led inside!

Being super hungry and excited about the potential of getting fries with that, I ran!

The glass door was stuck but that didn't stop me from shaking it violently thinking maybe there's a rock in there or something and it'll come loose if I just work harder at being successful with doors.

It didn't take long for that glass door to morph into about twenty thousand tiny glass doors that managed to organize themselves into a neat pile on the floor, giving me access to the potential of a burger made my way.

Thinking: Wow these automated doors have come a long way since I was a kid.

Meanwhile some skinny dude was yelling, "We're clothed!  We're clothed!"  And I was like, "Yeah!  So am I!  Can I get a whopper!"

"No!  We're clothed!"

This kind of went on for about five minutes until I realized they must be under new management and the only way to qualify for a whopper is to take my clothes off first, so I did.

I ended up getting more than a whopper right in front of everyone so there was no need to feel embarrassed.

Tried to order again and they still refused so I was thinking you know what?  This job doesn't look hard but they seem to be struggling so maybe I should just go back there and help them out.

Unfortunately I don't know the first thing about meat so I just started rubbing butter all over myself because this was the first time I ever had access to so much free butter and the floor reminded me of a slip and slide.

I took a few running dives headfirst across that floor until I snagged my penis on something that spun me around in the direction of all these employees holding phones and recording me.  I kind of hate that though when you're at work and everyone is looking over your shoulder seeing what you're doing instead of minding their own business and getting their work done.

So I was all like, "You know what you guys?  If you're not going to pull your weight around here, I'm going walk out that fucking cool door we have and you can deal with breakfast rush all by yourselves."

Those useless bastards took it as empty threat but I wasn't kidding so I walked.

You would not believe what happened next.

I had been working so hard and for several years, burning whatever life I had away in order to become a successful content creator for reasons I still can't figure out.  All that work and not once did I go viral until I turned the Youtube on that day and saw myself skidding across that floor.

They had the entire episode recorded including several different camera angles, picture-in-picture, and even security cam footage which is sometimes impossible to get no matter how hard you try.

It's the best content I ever made.  Nearing 100 million views with no signs of slowing down.  Feeling on top the world.  I did it!

So I just thought I'd come here and let you folks know it's been awhile but I'm doing okay.

Have a nice day.

Credits:
All art and images seen here were produced digitally, by me.
NoNamesLeftToUse Outro.png

"I doubt I'll ever work in the fast food industry again, though.  It's just not for me."

© 2021 @NoNamesLeftToUse.  All rights reserved.



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81 comments
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I was just about to write about something while having nothing to write about, so I will go back and read what you wrote on writing when you have nothing to write about, to see if it will help me write about something, while having nothing.

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It's the best content I ever made. Nearing 100 million views with no signs of slowing down. Feeling on top the world. I did it!

Now you can sell it as an NFT called, "It takes two hands to handle a Whopper"

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Way to be
There on the
Fly like that

I watched the whole thing over your shoulder.

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I managed to post today finally, with ten unfinished drafts or so lol 😂. I get disperse on ling articles and struggle editing, but you know, I woke, made that cup of coffee, and finally got one done, thanks spirit guide lok ;)

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I liked the subject, it is important to think before acting because success is achieved through what I want to be.

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That's right. Work hard enough and someday you can be calling the shots at Burger King.

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This is what I call applying Newton's second law "A body accelerates if a force is applied to it" when you don't know what to write just sit down and apply the force to start doing it the words flow by themselves, then you fix a little here and a little there and ready!

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Funny thing is, I knew exactly what I was doing, from start to finish.

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The glass door was stuck but that didn't stop me from shaking it violently thinking maybe there's a rock in there or something and it'll come loose if I just work harder at being successful with doors.

Being successful with doors is not a skill that’s taught in schools anymore. Remember when every school taught it? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

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I watch people walk into doors all the time. Now, on the surface, that sounds normal. The problem is, they're not going inside any buildings. All they're doing is walking into the door, expecting it to open itself, but it doesn't, and they bonk their heads, then can't figure out their next move.

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I blame that on Star Trek.

“It worked for Scotty, why doesn’t it work for me?

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People all getting beamed down instead of up. I see what you're sayin.

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I was merrily tapping away at a comment when I saw the guy with the glowing purple eyes and then I'm not sure what happened.

But I did manage to finally peel myself out of bed and get a coffee.

Did you manage to find something to write about? :D

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Maybe next week I'll have something to write about.

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Is that next week as in the week following this one or next week as in the next week you get around to it or the next week you find something to write about?

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I was thinking maybe the week after that.

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Sounds good XD

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Of course it does! Everything does!

I even successfully burned my finger trying to get the toast out of the toaster just now. I am on a roll!

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Oh goodness you really are on a roll :O really must have been something in those hypnotic videos (and glowing purple eyes).

you didn't burn yourself too badly did you

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A few months ago while in a hurry to get somewhere, this nice lady with a gun started honking at me with a really cool horn so I pulled over to see if that would make it stop. Next thing I know she's complimenting my skills and even asked for an autograph.

...successful day involved simply stepping off the bus since that nice lady decided to keep my license safe so I don't lose it.

Lol. I am dead!

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Next she'll come visit me to ask a few questions about where you been lately and if I have anything to do with your disappearance. I better shower!

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My ghost will be listening in on the answers you give to her! LOL

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(Edited)

You're going to hear a lot of banging, because this man ain't going down like that, but can't ghosts just watch porn like regular people?

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(Edited)

Be careful with the banging otherwise, her gun will for sure make you join the party over here,

Ghost porn sucks, without bodies, what's the point?...humans should really cherish having them bodies.

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I cherish my body all the time but all these people do is act afraid and tell me to put it away. Can't even walk near a school now, yet these bastards keep telling me to go get my GED.

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Write and improve it with digital art is something cool. Love it. Thanks for sharing this @nonameslefttouse becasue I love writing too and combine it with my own photography even I am just an amateur. God bless you. Let me to reblog your post.

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Do it, love it, and never forget the most important part. Try not to take things too seriously and just have fun.

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Yups.. Thank you sir for your suggestion, even not too serious and do by fun but you still keep a quality. Hopefully I can do as well as you. Blessing

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We're clothed hahahaha and the buttery penis snagging. Oh dear, I laughed very hard.

You're a success!! You made it!!

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I did it!

Also had a strong feeling you'd enjoy those jokes.

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Haha, yeah man. I loved it but when it got too the burger king onward I couldn't stop chuckling!

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This is a post about the bread and butter of life lol. The mushy brain part comes right in between the slices and it is not always a great piece of sandwich. But one has to eat what life/himself/herself prepared so I guess we all have that moment of rubbing off the butter and hoping someone will care to put some crumbs on the top. Lol. You know, as crazy as the world is now, I would not be surprised if someday you would see a butter smearing scene live in front of your eyes. Wild wild west

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But then the butter lovers might get triggered and start cancelling the butter rubbers, putting them out of a job. I think I'd still be interested in seeing that though.

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Ah I already imagined a big scene in a McDonald's. It would be hilarious. It could happen if someone would suddenly discover that a butter rub off would be the best remedy anti Covid. Gimme gimme gimme some butter after midnight lol. Ok I definetely have too much visual imagination, I'll stop here😂

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Well, "When I Have Nothing To Write About" I usually tend to not write nothing at all. Although also sometimes for the same reason, I have the mania to write everything I've not written before in one fell swoop. The Future

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Strange how so many focus on headlines these days. That must mean my headline was a success!

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As you know and you must be aware, I am one of those rare species that not only consumes all the content of what I read from top to bottom and from right to left. But I also do the same with each and every one of the comments that the perpetrators of what I read have obtained. But in this case, I think that only the headline was what had the most impact to quote and highlight.

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I doubt I'll ever work in the fast food industry again, though. It's just not for me.

Honestly, you sounded like the most hard-working Burger King employee I've come across so far. I think there's a real career path for you!

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(Edited)

I just don't like the people. You said it yourself. Now imagine being there all day, and all they do is bitch about how much butter you're using, instead of working the window.

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Ugh, so true. Atleast if they were actually working, they wouldn't even notice your butter usage.

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Exactly. So what if I just step aside and rub a bit on my nipples. It helps me concentrate.

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Well, I mean, other people have smoke breaks. It's only fair for you to get a few butter breaks.

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I am so smiling. I love your sense of humor ad writing. If I could only be like you. But then.... I better not.

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You best not, Troy. I'll take one for the team. You all can just relax and have fun.

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Long time, no Hive. Also, ust checking in with someone Not Important Right-Now.

It was so inspiring I now feel like donating even more money to the government so others can have nice things and be treated just as fairly.

You are a saint.

I haven't even started my article and I don't know when I will.

Now I'm going to go on the Canadian social medias and defend another Canadian I admire, Christ Sky, what a hero.

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Pretty sad for you, no names left to use, no clothes, no content

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There's no sadness here. Except maybe now.

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Sadness is better than nothing esp for an artist

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Sadness feels great for some stupid reason. Like I'm successful at it or something. This shit is successfully making me insane!

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Wow, I wish I could write something like this even tho I have nothing to write about. It's like you just took me right there with you — from sitting in front of your screen, to the hypnotizing, to the Burger King incident. Entertaining read. As for me, I struggle with content creating. I've made a LOT of drafts that have never seen the light of day. Hahaha! Anyway, I'll give you a follow coz I'm curious to read more of these (and maybe better ones too).

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Pardon my late response. I'm sometimes far away from the internet, or choosing to spend time on other projects/life that need my attention, or simply on vacation.

Glad you enjoyed this one. I remember actually laughing as I was putting it together, which for me is rare. You folks are the ones who don't know what's coming next. I know, because I created it, so it's impossible to be caught off guard... yet I still managed to chuckle at this mess.

I too have many drafts that'll never see the light of day. Years ago I was able to create daily with ease. Then my brain to turn mush. That part of this post is actually true!

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I appreciate the self-aware acknowledgement of the situation of everyone wanting to make content in this world these days. This is more honest and more helpful to me than more posts about how to get views and followers and money out of the Internet or the crypto community.

Then something went off in my head resembling a sound I could smell.

That's the problem with those dimensional impossibilities. They can be beautiful, transcendent, paradigm-shattering ideas -- often are, in fact. But there's no context to facilitate their expression. So you have to just put it out there in its misunderstood vulnerability.

Good luck.

(I'm never going to a fast food restaurant again.)

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