Men's Mental Health, II.
1 in 4 men aged 16-24 had self-harmed while 1 in 4 of people with eating disorders are male. Half of males say social media, celebrity culture and mass media create pressure to have a "perfect body".
More males are dying by suicide than females as reports have shown. Males aged between 50 to 54 continue to have the highest suicide rate while experiencing burn outs and changes in behaviour. We should try and help support people's mental and physical well-being.
We all have a part to play and we don't have to ask unconcerned. You can be seated next to a broken person and you wouldn't know it. This video explains depression and suicide more than you can ever imagine and I hope you have a look at it: [Instagram Link]
Sometimes the signs are not obvious and it might just be someone trying to mask the pain by being overly excited. It's okay as men to talk to someone you can trust and for those who have noticed the obvious signs or something that is off, it's okay to ask twice: "How are you?". We live in a world where asking people how are you is always met with a short answer: "Fine". It's good to ask twice and ask how they are, really. It can birth a lot of emotions and opening up.
Prostrate cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer here in the UK and it has been creeping up most often now even all over the world. It affects men over 50 mainly and anyone assigned male at birth can get this prostrate cancer. Reports have shown also that generally, 1 in 8 men will get prostrate cancer in their lifetime and 1 in 4 black men also will get prostrate cancer also. If you ever have history of such in your family, it's advisable to detect it early by going for regular doctor's appointments and not wait until you are 50 because those who have history of it in their families can catch it early too.
As discussed in the first part of this post also, we are used to saying "Big Boys Don't Cry" or "Boys Don't Cry". We have instilled that thought that men can't show emotions and need to be strong every time. Men grew up with the mentality that not needing help or expressing certain emotions makes us weak, and that shouldn't be.
Have you ever seen situation where another man sees another man crying and cringe? We always make it sound like crying makes people look weak. It's okay to seek for help. We need to understand our limits too and ask for help. We are humans after all with flesh, blood and emotions.
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today; doctor's order.
Most of men are not vocal with their feelings. Guessed it was because that how they are raised to be strong.
This is true. They expect men to be strong so anything that makes a man look weak, that man won't talk about it while suffering in silence. It's sad.
That's the word...suffering in silence. Most men are and they wouldn't speak because the world expect them to be strong.
Very true, my friend. They are not vocal because the world said they have to be strong so they suffer in silence instead.
I have been waiting for this second part. Thank you for coming up with it. This is really an eye opener and I can see this blessing a lot of men. It's true, the signs are not always obvious which is why we need to look closely. That video says everything like you have rightly said. Kudos.
I thought I was the only one looking forward to the part B. It's true that sometimes, we really need to look closely to know what a fellow man is going through.
Speaking up for the men is awesome and I appreciate @olawalium for doing this...
Thank you so much, brother. Indeed, we need to look closely because the signs are not obvious sometimes. We can be seated next to a broken person and not know it.
I also had a friend who is still 18 years old and he liked a girl but their relationship could not be done due to some reasons then we have seen that he had gone into so much depression that one day he even tried to commit suicide but this He was lucky that he had taken the pills that he had taken, but he was immediately taken to Nishtar Hospital, so his stomach was washed, due to which he got life once again, so he cried a lot later that he has done wrong but he was saying here that man does not understand anything in this reality.
Depression is real and most people can't relate with it. It's important to learn how to be gentle with one another.
Every human cannot handle this and then they start making mistakes.
This is one of the reasons why I tell people to be careful with words and how we treat others. We don't know what a fellow human is nursing mentally and out of ignorance, we do things that only complicate their issue.
It takes just a single trigger. We don't know what they are nursing inside and it takes just a small issue to make them relapse or lose it.
That video is everything. That video says a lot. You see the bubbly guy and the quiet guy...you would think the quiet one is the depressed one not knowing the loud one was masking the pain. Sometimes, the signs are not that obvious.
Quite so much that the men are passing through and the truth is they are really strong. Most of the time I always wonder how do the men cope with everything they are passing through but they are not allowed to show their weaknesses in the community
Thanks for this observation. You know, I was beginning to think women don't see the struggles men pass through, but I am kinda pleased that it doesn't all go unnoticed.
Absolutely...it's high time we start seeing the struggled and help when there is a need to. It takes the right eyes to see the struggles of men and offer the needed help.
Well that was actually the notion that looks like it has been passed in the society but the truth is a lot of women see it. In fact they do admire the men because of that and see them as been strong for that reasons. Just that the society needs to raise the awareness much more
It baffles me too and we live in the world that shows little or no sympathy for men. Everything they are not doing right gets magnified rather than allow it be a cry for help. It's okay not to be okay. Thanks a lot for this.
Perfectly said. Little or no sympathy is been shown to the men. But I strongly believe it is about to turn around in the society. Men are really filled with strength I mean so much of strength to be able to handle all these but they also needs the help of we the women and the society generally. Things like this does not really have to go like this over and over again for the men or what do you think @olawalium
I think finally there is a heart cry on behalf of the men in the society 😭. We have been suffering mentally in silent for so long and this is not supposed to be so. Sometimes I usually wonder who do the men gender offend that we are treated like the way we are treated in the society. We are not permitted to show our pain and we are expected to carry a lot of burdens. If you don't carry them, you will be seen as a weak man and if you show a slight sign of the burden you are carry, you will be seen as a weak fellow also
Hahaha I wonder the same too...who did we offend that would decide to leave heavy burden on our heads hahaha. It's high time we get the help that we need.
Most of these things happen to us at a similar age when a person does not have much life experience and he loses courage at this age, then such things happen but in this way. should never be done because our parents and siblings will be living a troubled life later on so it is better that we learn to face everything in life and success in life is a Only one thing can be obtained and that is hard work. If we work hard, then we will definitely get all the other things.
I'm confused with this comment because it doesn't relate to anything that was posted in the post. My friend, it's important for you to only drop your own comment and not be replying every comment in the comment section. Thank you.
Ok sir i will be careful
I think that is really true and needed. At first I was looking at his comment and trying to relate it with the post but was wondering how does it relate.
Still trying to get your comments but I guess I am still able to pick something's from what you said. Most times what we have faced always brace us up to be strong and achieve great things beyond which we can imagine and it is in this process that we should be strong
As in eh, me self I use to reason it because the truth is the weigh is getting heavy as day goes by. The most pathetic thing is the fact that we are not even permitted to express our feelings and how we feel instead we will be seen as a weak vessel. Well I strongly believe the future is bright
I don't know if it's because of the feigned strength or if there are other reasons, but you have a lot of movements, agencies and all that pushing for women, the girl child etc. but none for the boy child. The males are usually ignored, even by fellow males.
It's a pity for the men who are in need and to the one without a present need, it is a worry because whenever you fall prey to life, you already have an idea how you will be ignored.
It's good to always have that circle of friends you can cry too, because the world doesn't care what a man is going through.
Thanks for the message on prostate cancer, it's a very important one.
Most people are not pushing for men because they believe every man must be strong forgetting that a man that has it all bottled inside would surely become a problem to the female that is being given attention. We need to take care of everyone and give everyone equal help to be a better person.
The wait for this second part has been worth it my friend, it is true what you mention, many friends of mine are stronger than I think, because despite many situations that I know they have gone through they have always known one way or another to get ahead, as well as I have seen men suffer in silence is really sad, I for my part have 2 friends that whenever something happens to me I write them and then we talk about it in person and they have helped me a lot, you have to release those burdens to be well, very great post friend, very complete indeed ♥
It's okay to ask for help as you have rightly mentioned with people you speak with. A burden shared is a burden halved. Thank you very much and I am happy you enjoyed this.
Whenever I have needed them they have always been there for me at all times, they have known how to tell me things and well it is not too much to ask for help to lower the burden a little, men also have feelings and emotions even if it does not seem so, you just have to move forward and get ahead ♥
Move forward and get ahead. We all need help. No one can make it out here all alone in this world. We all need help.
Exactly we all need help, if we have the courage to communicate what we have, depression and other diseases that affect our mind would drop considerably, as I mentioned if the mind fails the body too, it is important to ask for help when required ♥
There are so many things a man is going through but you may never hear him say it out and that’s why it is good to at least give them peace if that’s the only thing we can offer
Yes most men won't speak up because of how the society has caged men. Most men who speak are either ridiculed or called less of a man. It's important to give the necessary help as most people tilted towards suicide afterwards.
Yaaaaay. Thank you so much and happy Easter to you and yours. 🤗🤗🤗
I actually saw that video and it was really emotional. A lot of men die in silence just because they don't want to be referred to as a weakling and it's sad. Men are humans too, they have feelings and their emotions should be put into consideration a lot of time.
Thanks for the advice on prostrate cancer, it's really becoming a thing globally.
I am glad you also saw that video. That video speaks volume and it's high time we get the help that we need and look closely and help each other. Thank you very much, brother.
A lot of good would be happening in this world if we pause once in a while to support others whether they request it or not. We are our brother's keepers and that's why God even mandated that we should love our neighbours as ourselves.
Absolutely my brother. Well said. God bless your wisdom even more. Thanks a lot and for your consistency too. Means a lot.
It is a fact that life as it is is not easy. In every age there are some problems in life. A wise and brave person is the one who can handle all kinds of things if we handle all these things. If not able to do it, it is also a fact that then a person goes towards suicide, which is a very wrong thing, but when a person's mind gets stuck, no matter what age he is in, then he has no other solution. If it happens, then one day he leaves this world, then this thing is very wrong. Suicide should never be committed. So we all should try to live life patiently and solve problems. Keep searching then only we will be able to live a good life.
When people can't handle a lot of things then tend to draw towards suicide as you have rightly said which is why we need to offer help when we see the signs. It's important to be tender with one another.
Most of the people are madly in love and do such things. They do a lot of wrong. They don't even think about their parents and how much pain they will suffer afterwards.