TOXICITY EXAMINED 2

Hello beautiful people. Continuing from where we stopped...

1. They will shrink your dreams.

They'll find reasons your good news isn't great news. The classics: About a job - 'The money isn't that great for the amount of work you'll be doing.' About a house - 'The self-contained doesn't have a water heater, are you sure that's your standard? About a journey - 'the roads are too bad. Are you sure you want to go?' Get the idea? Don't let them dampen you or shrink you or your dreams down to their size. You don't need their approval anyway or anyone else's for that matter.

1. They keep unfinished business. They won't pick up their phone or reply to texts, they are master snubbers. They will keep you worried and bring up so much drama, that you will be wondering what you've done to upset them, or whether they're dead, alive, or just ignoring you - which can sometimes all feel the same. People who care about you won't let you go on feeling rubbish without attempting to sort it out. When they put you through such unnecessary pain, take it as a sign of their commitment to you if they leave you 'out there' to dry with any reasonable cause.

Source

1. They are always hiding something.

The message might be innocent enough but there is always something more that they will not tell you. They are masters at hoarding important free information. When they request your help or give you a hint about a business or whatever, always ask what it entails. Saying No to them should be your hobby, or else, you will be used until you become practically useless.

1. They'll make you prove yourself. They'll regularly put you in a position where you have to choose between them and something/someone else - and you'll always feel obliged to choose them. Toxic people will wait until you commit, then they'll unfold the drama. 'If you cared about me you'd skip your exercise class and spend time with me.' The problem with this is that enough will never be enough. They will keep demanding until they suck the life out of you. Few things are fatal - unless it's life or death, chances are it can wait.

2. They love past tense.

When you're trying to resolve something important to you, toxic people will bring the past into it. The problem with this is that before you know it, you're arguing about something you did six months ago, still defending yourself, rather than dealing with the issue at hand. Somehow, it's just about what you've done to them. You might be trying to resolve an issue or get clarification and before you know it, the conversation/argument has moved away from the issue that was important to you and on to the matter which you talked about 3 years ago.

1. They are masters in exaggeration.

They can make a mountain out of a cup of sand. Eg. You spilled water in the apartment, you apologized and moved on, when they want to tell the story, they will make sure the world knows how you channeled river Niger and flooded their apartment and how much they lost in the process of that. You will end up being indebted to them. No matter how you try to correct the impression, You won't win. And you don't need to. Just run for your life.

1. They'll judge you into oblivion.

We all get it wrong sometimes but toxic people will make sure you know it and pay for it. They'll judge you and take a swipe at your self-esteem suggesting that you're less than nothing because you made a mistake (even good mistakes). The common one, you will call them and they will judge you for not calling them for the past 1 month when they are guilty of the same, they will also demand a pound of flesh for doing them good. Don't let them judge you. Step away as fast as possible or you will pay a terrible price.