Raptor, A Collection of Poems
fuel
trapped in the clear blue empty sky
farsighted, hot-headed
sacred
love quickens
love compels me
to dive
to pierce
to kill
hush
she
no haggard
but caught, valiant
in an unseen snare
and no bloody end
no
jessed instead
hooded instead
waiting
breathing
listening
rapt
uncle
a day old chick
is offered me
I, still wild
tethered to your wrist and hungry
refuse
we wait while you wake me
bullies
wings and wine and wild things
disturb my afternoon nap
genuine, unkind wild things
shift their weight
then linger
the brutes
I rise to greet them
a conquistador vanquished
a lover lost
my stomach growling
I rise
In looking through my older works, I found these which I had forgotten about. I wrote them about ten years ago when I was considering taking up falconry. Falconry turned out to be too much work for me (holy cow is it a lot of work!) and I got chickens instead, but I am still fascinated by the art.
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Ohhh.... these are excellent. I love how minimal and abstract they are! I'm able to feel them immediately on the first read without needing to think what they're about, then re-reading brings the subject into clearer relief.
I feel that "bullies" is the best example of that. There's paradoxical emotion that resolves in the decision to rise. Upon re-reading, one gets a sense that it is the dense vagaries of physical life that are bullying, threatening one's peace. Definitely a fitting conclusion to this collection and contains a sense of finality where the others lift, unresolved, into surprise at their end.
Thanks so much for the close read and superb comment! I was surprised by how much I still like these, and didn't have to change a single thing before publishing them today. I remember working a very long time on each bit, including researching and watching birds of prey swoop about. It makes me very happy to hear that they had a positive effect for you.
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The falcon is present, without being named. Lovely. I guess that's what minimalist poetry can do: create energetically. You've clearly conveyed the presence of that bird (especially in the first poem), but that presence is in a space beyond the words. Far more powerful than a precise description could ever be.
Wow! Thanks! Saying the ineffable is the primary function of poetry for me, so that's a cool comment, the best. Have you tried haiku? Keep an eye out on @bananafish's haiku contest in English, which should be popping up soon. That there is stating both the obvious and the ineffable in very few syllables and is a major rush.
I have tried haiku, and I'm far from mastering it! I'll definitely watch for that contest.
Thanks for the cross post! That's pretty cool! And you can do that after payout? Does it have to have been published in a community?
Ta da!
https://steempeak.com/haikucontest/@bananafish/mizu-no-oto-every-image-has-its-haiku-edition-47-english
These inspired me to write !
Thank you 🙏🏻
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It's my pleasure! Check out @mariannewest for daily freewrite prompts and good friends. Welcome.
OMG I love these verses from a raptor's POV!!!
Powerful and compelling:
Wow! and this:
And "the brutes" - high impact AND humorous.
You are inspired! I love this! and the final lines - forgive me, was I not supposed to laugh? - the conquistador, stomach growling - seem such a humbling, human touch. I love it. Love it! You are on a roll @owasco!
Thank you honey bunch! It's one of my favorites. I really do think this one said what I wanted it to say. I was going to continue because I never got to actually being flown, or used to hunt, or returned to their perch, or the longing for freedom that I imagine they feel, or the love of their human. there's so much more!
#posh https://twitter.com/tea_in_carolina/status/1233020734982754305
Are we still supposed to post proof of Twitter shares? what is the point in doing this...?
I've stopped. It got me nothing
I would have missed this! That would have been sad... I am interested in hacking micro stanzas and the punchy weight.
Such profoundness in between the minimalised sentences.
They are a lot of work actually. I think each of these took me at least a month to write. Words would come in my dreams; I think "hush" did.
Writing haiku is a super rush, maybe you would like this contest: https://steempeak.com/haikucontest/@bananafish/mizu-no-oto-every-image-has-its-haiku-edition-47-english
xo
I have never mastered micro and minimal writes. Haikus and this kinda poetry are genres I have had to read on other's poets timelines like yours.
Will give it a try though not sure I will post it though 😁
Each session has a theme that some of us try to learn. This one is about a form called haibun. It doesn't really matter if you write a haibun though. Just start. It's a great group, no pressure, like a great haiku.
It's interesting the challenges writers throw at me. You sound like @raj808 or @chinyerevivian right now! I accept this challenge for once though :D
If I fail, (which the anxiety of accepting a challenge I do miserably is letting me know that I will) it's all your faults!
There's no such thing as a failed haiku. I hope you like it. It is my favorite thing to do on steem.
Congratulations @owasco!
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Energetic feeling of raptors life in haiku, short and exceptionally descriptive.
You capture the very essence in this format of writing, well done!
Thanks so much!
Love these! It's fun rediscovering pieces we've written and forgot about. Sometimes it's not clear right away what we were thinking then; what was going on... and then it all comes back.
Yes! All of it. I've been culling photographs. I have GAZILLIONS of photographs because both my hubby and his father would take 40 shots of every moment. Most of them mean nothing to me - the photos usually do not jog my memory. But a poem! Now that can bring if all back.
Your poems are wonderful @owasco 💕
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thank you Uncle!
This type of poetry is quite new to me. Artistry in words in a simple yet beautiful way.
Check out @bananafish's haiku contest. It's a fun, no pressure contest. My favorite thing to do on steem. This edition is a bit different, but for starters you could just write a regular haiku. I have learned so much from entering this contest.
Fascinating pieces.
I like the point of view and find it compelling how we can mirror that voice to some human affairs, like killing for love. It seems admirable in one species, despicable in the other.
It is not pretty to see ourselves as a food chain within a food chain.
Nice catch on my use of the word love. Right on the mark.
Thanks for your support!
You are a talented poetess @owasco. I love the lines
“ wings and wine and wild things
disturb my afternoon nap“
I love those lines too. A captive bird resentful of being summoned to serve humans. I need to finish this collection!
Beautiful poem, evidently explains the hunting function of the bird of prey and what it could feel at the moment of action. Nice, I loved it.
Thank you so much! That's an excellent understanding of the first poem!
Nice picture of an eagle @owasco. And interesting poem. I have images of eagles all around my office. Not sure what that says about me. But ... I am a collector of them! 😊
Someone once asked me what animal I would like to be and I answered, without hesitation, an eagle. So I understand. The pix is from pixabay though
I really thought about birds when reading your poems, you truly paint a nice picture :) Falconry is facinating, but I'm sure chickens are much easier to deal with!
Not when I have to shovel out to the chicken coop in the winter! (I'd have to shovel out to the falcons too though.) So far this year I have been spared that.
I don't know if translating it into Spanish loses the rhyme, but I loved what inspires a stomach growl! 😂 Hugs!!
Oh, my!!! This entire selection gives me goosebumps. I love, love, love the wonderful tone of this. The flow. The evenly spaced wordage and how it rolls off my tongue.
This is probably one of my favorites that you have ever done.
No, seriously. I mean it. I cannot put my finger on it, but, it pulls me towards it and I am a hard sell.
I love it. I do. From me to you, you are such a talented spirit. Have a great day!
Upped and steemed
!tip
Oh thank you darling! I can say that it IS my favorite thing I ever wrote, and I remember working on it for months and months. I'd like to finish it now, so maybe in a year. It's only half the hawk's story.
Oh!!! Wow! I can hardly wait!! XOXO You are so talented in the writing department!
To all you downvoters, this is the very best thing I have ever written and THIS you choose to downvote?! What did I ever do to you?!!!!
@mmmmkkkk311, For real?! Go pick on someone your own size.
Read my reply https://steemit.com/promo-steem/@kennyskitchen/re-mmmmkkkk311-q6fcjw
I already returned your rewards @owasco. I'm going to return all the rewards this jack-ass steals from people. (unless the content is actually trash of course)
thanks again. If I can help out lemme know.
I'm not reading anything of yours. You have made me a casualty of your war with someone else. Like I said, go pick on somebody your own size.
He baselessly claims it is a "ponzi scheme" which just shows that either he doesn't understand how it works or (more likely) he just doesn't understand what a ponzi scheme even is! And the blatant hypocrisy in him trying to fight "vote selling" when that is exactly what he did with his bidbot! As as bidbot owner with over a dozen alt accounts he is in no place to judge what is right or wrong here on Steem. Now he is mad that his scam has ended. So like an upset child, he has decided to take out his anger (caused only by his own failures) on other innocent people. Making him nothing more than a big bully!
MK admits to running a bidbot
Actual account who was "wrecked by @mmmmkkkk311 (for holding sbi shares)"
I am here to counter @mmmmkkkk311's bullying. I will upvote every post/comment that he downvotes. You can support my anti bullying upvotes by delegating (links below) Steem Power to @ilovemk311. And you can help keep this message visible by upvoting this comment or by purchasing SBI shares for @mk311isabully which will help to counter the downvotes that @mmmmkkkk311 will surely send my way. Which I highly encourage him to do as the more downvoting power he wastes on me the less he can use to downvote the real content creators here on Steem that would otherwise become his victims!
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With this jerk bullying innocent people we are seeing many great content creators leave due to the drama and negativity that @mmmmkkkk311's downvote campaign brings to the blockchain. While he claims he is trying to defend his investment he is actually unwittingly destroying it.
SBI is an initiative that has done nothing but help promote onboarding and community building here on the Steem blockchain. Let us not turn our back on it out of fear for getting downvoted. Instead lets stand up for this great initiative that has helped so many people and helped the Steem community to grow and thrive!
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Upvoted to cancel out the flags from MK311/mariuszkarowski
I am sobbing over here right now and I am not lying. I was so very upset about this! How did you find it? Thank you thank you thank you.
I gave out some SBIs yesterday from my account and from TSU, and that jackass came through and down-voted all the live content from multiple accounts.
I went to check out some of his posts, and your comment was the first new one I saw :-)
I'm now keeping track of his activities, and I'll be cancelling out his DVs (unless the content is really low quality and I don't want to put my votes toward it)
I gave out some yesterday too, to @freewritehouse of all entities. I guess it wasn't a good day to be nice. You'd think with the soft fork to ward off possible evil from justin sun, they could have done a little something to stop the known malevolence of this guy. He robs from the poor to funnel back into the reward pool.
Thank so much again. I'm pretty sure I am in TSU on discord. I keep hoping to get cracking over there esp in NM, but it takes a lot to just stay on my toes around here.
So! You gave up falconry for chickenry??? Lol.
There is a saying; "You can't soar like an Eagle when you hang out with chickens" hahaha.
Jokes aside. you wrote a powerful and lovely poem here my friend.
Blessings and congrats!
lol I need a sign that says that!!!!! I love that!
xo
Hahaha, 👌 ❤️ 👌
I read it about four or five times. It was that good. I may be one of those wild things disturbing the raptors slumber. I like to sneak up on the Eagles in my back yard in order to try and steal a photograph or two. Usually they see me long before I am close enough.
Sorry about those nasty down-voters. It makes no sense to me at all.
Thanks for your support. I was very upset. I really do think this is the best thing I have ever written, and to have that be my first post downvoted like that was very demoralizing. It had me questioning the meaning of life, ya know?
You are definitely one of the wild things in my poem. Thank you for knowing that.
Yeah.. I have been there and usually the answers you get are just as demoralizing as the actions themselves. I unvoted my typical 10% and gave you a full 100%!! Wow.. a whole .08 worth. Oh well I tried to help push it the other way best I could.
I still think it was AWESOME and I think you are AWESOME too! I'm here for you :-)
I can retire my Friday knowing I am a "Wild Thing". Love It!!
Thank you so much. Just imagine what happens to a 100% upvote of mine on a low earning post. I hate the upvote curve. Somebody needs to tinker with that math, because it really hurt the Littles.
These are wonderful, particularly bullies. It is so efficient, succinct and expressive. Next, I find *uncle to be extremely successful. But they all are. The two last are just my personal favorites. I am drawn to economy of style and it's hard to see how you could have been more economical in bullies and still have expressed the thought fully.
Warm regards,
AG
xo
Continue to share your wonderful content dear friend. Providing positive energy and inspiring emotion is nothing to take lightly. Don't worry about the riff-raff ... karma handles that just fine !tip
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Oh! I am overwhelmed with your generosity! Thank you so much. I truly feel blessed.
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Thank you!!!!
dont let it get you down we have your back
I see that! I feel the love! Thank you!
Would it be called "chickenry" instead of "falconry"? Or "fowlery"? 😂
I really like that first poem. It really does paint a picture or a majestic eagle soaring above the world until he needs to strike.
Thank you!
I like fowlery. that could come in handy someday in a nonsense poem!
It sounds like a nursery rhyme!
Foolery Fowlery!
Foolery Fowl
A silly old fowler missing a thumb!
Foolery thought he was training a fowl,
Not realising the bird was really an owl!
When the owl got hungry at a quarter past eight,
It was poor Foolery's thumb that got ate!
go check out @rycharde's nonsense contest. you have two more days. That could even be an entry for it!
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Thank you!
Glad to see more of your treasures form the past. I would love to take up falconry, but it's just too intimidating for me as well. If I could wish for something, I'd wish I already was a falconer and enjoy the interaction with those marvellous birds of prey!
Beautiful poetry, @owasco. What powerful creatures. I love how you captured the subtleties of the bird’s temperament, and that he is more than just a predator. We can identify with him In his moment of defiance against his captor.