The Fear of the Unknown

If there's something I've always wanted to do but never took seriously, it was to get a personal hair clipper for myself. For some reason I keep on postponing, and earlier this morning, I almost regretted that choice.

Yesterday, a friend of mine who happens to be a nurse was telling me the story of how she and her boss had gone to do some free HIV tests for people in the school not too far away from here. And according to her, they had a couple of positive results.

I don't know why, but hearing that kind of made me a bit scared, and I immediately asked her to help get me a test kit for me to check mine at home. Later that evening, she had knocked on my door, and we had proceeded to take a blood sample for the test.

After making use of the syringe, we had to wait a bit because apparently she needed to settle or something like that. I'm not in the medical field, so I really don't understand the entire details. But we waited and ended up waiting till the next day, and that was probably the longest night of my life.

For some reason I found it really difficult to sleep just knowing that the test strip was right there in front of me. So I lay awake on my bed for most of the night and immediately called her back to my room the moment it was morning. And when she finally got what she wanted after looking at the blood in the syringe, she had gone ahead to apply it to the test strip.

I probably have never been so scared before in my life, as I watch the whole thing play out right in front of me. Of course the result came out negative (I wouldn't be making the blog if it was anything else other than that), but the fear I felt while waiting for the result was enough to let me know that I have to stop playing with my life and go get a personal clipper.

And I plan on doing that right after I get the money for it, because I never want to feel that way ever again.