Phases.

I wish I could say like a teenager, "I kinda like being sick, I like when someone takes care of me."

Unfortunately, I'm not a teenager anymore nor this quote will fit anywhere in my life. We change, time makes us a different person, it comes with a lot of responsibilities, and it has some phases. I wouldn't say I regret anything. But yes, there's something that I still wish for. Like that silly thing to say to someone.

For the last couple of days, I'm suffering from severe fever and headache. But as a mom, there's no rest. My son is also showing some fever symptoms so he comes first. I don't know maybe because I'm a covid survivor, this simple seasonal fever is killing me this time. Headache, muscle pain, and back pain is getting worse even with medication. Or maybe simply I'm getting old!

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Anyway, so I was thinking if there would be someone who would take care of me like when I used to live with my parents. My husband does a lot after coming back home but the days are very long, you know. I accept this phase of life and feel blessed for what I have. But still, as a human, all human desire will be in me. So I miss something, I wish for something that would never come true, and, I feel sad about silly things.

Every stage of life is the foundation for the next stage of life.

This is what I came to realize. It's my bad that I failed to live my fullest during my teen years and my early adulthood. But now as I discover where I should invest myself, I become more concentrating on my present life. I'm trying to make this foundation stronger.

There will be phases where we will feel regret, when we will hate our past self, we will become a different human with a whole different life perspective. All these phases make us what we are. There's no way to leave any phase or hate anything, right? It all comes with lessons.

I'm talking 'too much motivational' that it should like 'fake'; I know. Maybe it's my fever or maybe I'm aging. Or maybe both.

Despite this is what it is.

Live your fullest in every phase of life, and make your foundation stronger for the next episode.