Secret love has gone down in secret!
During a very busy day, he came into my mind out of nowhere. Or maybe he lives in my mind. A little breeze unveiled his face, that's it. My mind is so habituated to thinking about him that I never thought one day it will end. Probably my brain still processing it and doesn't know how to make a barrier.
I said that's how 'first love' works!
Once we all were teens, we all had almost the same flood of emotions. The secret love, what nowadays is called 'crash', don't we all have that?
He was 21 then, and I was about 18. We were in mad love. But didn't realize when we moved on.
I again said that is what it is.
We grow up from our teens and become different people. It's quite normal to not find the same charm in the same person if both don't mentally grow in the same way. It takes a lot to maintain a relationship and it's okay if 18 years failed it.
I said you will forget, you will move on. You will probably find another one who you truly love. And then, you will realize your first love was not a love at all but just a feeling.
That secret love will go down in secret someday and you will not even cry for it!
But someday while you are busy doing things, with your life; he will knock your memory out of nowhere. Or does he? He lives in you. You just decided to not remember him anymore. But believe me, it's okay. Do you know what is not okay? Checking out in real how the person doing. Because what you are searching for is not there, dear. It's never there from the beginning.
It's better to live with the charm of first love, the secret feeling you still feel inside for that person. Dream about him sometimes but move on.
One of my friends is talking about her first love. She is still unmarried while his then boyfriend is married and now a father too. These were our convo a few days ago. I can relate to her, I mean, who can't? I have nothing but to let her show the reality.
The age of feeling tremble of joy has long gone. Now it's time to search for a second love, maybe!