The Act Of Giving As A Show Of Love

One of the ways of proving that you have a heart of love for someone is by your act of giving. It is true that you can give for various reasons (even without having love in mind), but you cannot love without giving. Yesterday was celebrated as the Valentine's day and one of the things that were remarkable about the event is the exchange of gifts. Now reflect back to what happened yesterday and know if who you claim to be in love with is also in love with you. If nothing from your loved one has ever dropped for you, then they may not love you as you think they do.

When I talk about giving, you should understand that it goes way beyond material things. You can actually give your time, an advice, your emotions, your affection, etc. So giving is not just limited to what you can see with your eyes; there are things that cannot be seen but felt, which hold very great potential in the life of an individual. If you are in a friendship for example, and nothing from them (material things, time, etc) ever drops for you, then you have to advise yourself that you are the only one in the friendship. Of course, one of the things to benefit in a relationship and even in a friendship is the act of giving.

I used to be friends with a particular lady when I was in the University. I would sacrifice things for her - my time, material things, etc. In fact, I was willing to go a mile because of the sake of friendship. However, I discovered that she would not take any step for me. In fact, she saw it that she was doing me a favour by being my friend. At first, I did not notice it. I only thought that maybe should would have given if she had. But as time went on, I discovered that even the things she could give, she would still not give, but expect everything to be done for her.

I saw all these, yet I allowed them to pass. Then I noticed that she actually gave to the people she loved, but would draw the line when it came to my case. Well, I had to advise myself that I am not a fool. It is true that one should not expect a reciprocity when giving, but at least, who you go a mile for should be able to take a couple of steps for too, to make it balanced. I withdrew myself and that was it. Friendship is not for parasitism but for mutualism, where everyone benefits from the love shared by each one. If it is called "love," then it should be shared. You do not hold on to things from whom you know will need it and then claim to love the person.

When you are passionate about the person that you love, it will show in the way you relate with them and through your heart of giving. One of my mentors would make this statement "if it is in your heart (talking about love), then it will be in your hands - in terms of giving." You will not need motivation to do good for the person you care about; it should flow naturally. If you see that you are having reservations about giving to someone, then love is nonexistent. It does not matter if the other person has more things than you, what matter is the intention. This is why I believe that the size of what you have to give is not as important as the heart from which it is coming from. But in order to give effectively, you have to give your heart first.

You have to be present in your present for it to count. Nothing adds more value to a gift than the heart of the giver. If your heart is not pure towards someone, your givings may not count. So in order for you to express your love through giving, you have to make your acts of giving worthwhile by giving from the heart. I conclude with this saying from the Southeastern part of Nigeria.

The worth of a gift is not measured in the size but in the heart of the giver.

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