Parenting, responsibilities and abuse


Parenting is a huge responsibility. Some people are just not for it and yet they are the ones who have children and then ignore the growing up years of the children which finally becomes a huge failure or scrapes through without much damage.

There is such an example in my extended family and I am not revealing names but referencing it because it can point out the mistakes and help someone from making it or prevent someone from associating with such a person.

A - an alcoholic and a person who likes to please his friends, ignoring his family and those who help him
B - A's wife who even if abused and literally robbed by A, still keeps on supporting him and refuses to listen to reason

I guess you might have got a picture.

Have you met such people in real life?

If so, keep away from them.


Parenting is not a joke

Consider the children of A and B. The children in the real-life story grew up wearing hand-me-down clothes and never had anything special in their lives. They studied hard and went on to work abroad and designed their own destiny and are now well off and to be honest are exemplary because they are supporting their parents as well who are now literally bankrupt.

Why bankrupt?
A still believes in borrowing money to have a good time with friends or else invests in some fraud scheme that his friends come up with. A's son still is on the run to repay the debts that his father has made.

You might think that it is weird that I am sharing such details but trust me, life is a complex matter and such stories are rampant in our tiny state and there are families that suffer on a daily basis.

Alcoholism and abuse are two sides of the same coin.

It is high time, people are educated about abuse. Abused people should become aware that there is a life beyond misery and it is a right to enjoy happiness and not be bound by miserable people who beat the hell out of you for not obeying.

Learn to say NO

When you learn to say NO, then you will realize that you have it in you to become independent and think for yourself.

Only if you value yourself, others will learn to respect you. Otherwise, it is a signal to the abusive people to keep on hurting you to such an extent that it is impossible to recover.

So, what should be done to avoid such a situation?

  • Be alert
  • Be wise and do not trust people easily, even if it is your spouse
  • Make sure you save money for yourself and spend some time for yourself
  • Do not think that it is your duty to please others
  • Do not make compromises
  • Do not think that parenting is a joke
  • Make sure that your voice is heard
  • Do not sacrifice your morals
  • Do not suffer abuse and then cry about it
  • Learn to be brave and voice your own opinion

I am hoping that these points will be of some use to sombody.


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Thank you for this post and I relate a lot to this.