Tales of the Urban Explorer: Astoria Bingo

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(Edited)

I thought I had polished off my content from October 2021, but found one hiding this morning in the depths of my file system.

“Easy to get in mate, over the fence and through the door on the side” - @anidiotexplores

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Except it wasn’t; the door had been closed and no amount of tugging was going to make a difference.

This was around July 2021, and the curse of Cinemas and Old Bingo Halls was going to continue for at least a little longer.

The Astoria Cinema was closed in the early-1960’s and was converted into a bingo club, which closed on 22nd February 2009. The building remains unused in 2014.


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Several months later, a GoonTuber was in and showed us very clearly the way. For this reason, I am not particularly shy about revealing the access point of 'Astoria Bingo'.

Reasons include:

    • It's a shit tip inside
    • HIVE is quite insular, many of the Facebook mindless crew don't think to look at my content
    • You wouldn't want to go there
    • Its already public knowledge
    • It could well be sealed by now. This intelligence is very old.
    • One slip around the back and you are facing motorway traffic and death. (we will come to that shortly).

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“There’s a car parked up right outside it”

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I had some concerns that this blighted, extremely non-photogenic relic of Britain’s past was going to thwart me once again.

@anidiotexplores had been in possibly a year before and fortunately for me, he doesn’t mind repeat visits.

Once again I was talking to myself as my comrade was already over the fence and climbing the secondary fence not waiting for me.

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Quickly forgetting about the car and hastily following, I was slower to get over both fences and then observed @anidiotexplores struggling to get down an extremely steep muddy embankment.

One slip, a few yards further and you are falling another 8 feet onto a very busy motorway with no hard shoulder.

I started sliding down the embankment noting the large slide marks made by my colleague. There was a rotting fence to hold but it was not very convincing.

After one close shave, a slip of six to seven inches resulting in me yelling loudly, ‘WOOOAAAHHHHH’, I made it to the bottom clutching on to a small tree that was bending in protest.

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A ladder materialised before my eyes and a hole obviously made by high explosives. What else could create a hole like that, perhaps a Sledgehammer… but up there?

I went plodding up the ladder first, with @anidiotexplores holding it. How do I get through this fucking hole?

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[Source] - @anidiotexplores

My legs don't stretch that much and I could only conclude that head first again was my only option. Well, why not? I was experienced by then after John Wyatt.

@anidiotexplores followed deftly climbing and somehow getting his legs through the gap. How I wish I had his elasticity.


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…’ @anidiotexplores is thoroughly astonished, and gapes at the wonders within Astoria Bingo, it was all a little overwhelming’…

We were in some kind of filthy bathroom with no sinks. I was only relieved the sinks were not my landing spot. They were only one notch above arriving in the shitters.

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We started to look around; there was evidence that it was a Bingo Hall. Perhaps all that effort would yield something of value, by means of images.

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Someone had been trying to renovate 'Astoria Bingo' and had given up the cause.

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Had it once been a small café to order from while you play bingo?

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Slag Emos must die. 'Emo' is a dated term.

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Lots of applications, with lots of personal details. Once upon a time, ‘Astoria Bingo’ had an audience.

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More words, and not very good ones.

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Some doors were barred inside, no going through there.

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An office, ransacked and full of clutter. Maybe there would be something worth looking at?

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Lots of membership forms and some of the applicants are quite young; if you can call born in 1980 that. Bingo has a reputation of bedraggled old women, who chain-smoke as the main gamblers.

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Looking at the income, presumably, for one day I can see why 'Astoria Bingo' was struggling to make ends meet.

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You can’t go in there, and smashing the windows is not going to make any difference.

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The poor graffiti crew had already visited, probably when the side door was open.

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What had it been before closure… The ticket hut?

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The main section of 'Astoria Bingo' looked like it had been used as a 'grow'. The pipe you can see gives it away. @anidiotexplores mentioned to me on his previous visit there was a strong smell of Ganga.

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More facts about the daily income from ‘Astoria Bingo’. They are not especially convincing.

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I am not quite sure what this relates to. Drop a comment if you are a Bingo expert. I would love to know.

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Could it be the poor exterior décor deterred even old ladies from visiting ‘Astoria Bingo’. The price seems cheap.

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Lighting a fire inside would quickly fill the room with smoke. They were not cooking burgers on a grill.

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Expect holes to appear if you try and burn the place down.

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A diary from 2007; It says ‘Fire Book’ and is filled with non-sensical writings.

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Anything of value has been ripped apart, probably long ago.

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'Urbex Mike' – he's a 12-year-old boy who explores with his mum. I know of him.

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Astoria Bingo’ was quite a short explore with little inside besides paperwork but a fun jaunt. It's bare inside, and I would expect it to be demolished at some point in time.

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Do you like posting your Urbex content and photography for FREE on Facebook and YouTube? I like to get some form of reward for my work and every time I create I do just that. Take a look at The Urbex Community on HIVE.

If you want to keep creating for FREE then ignore what you are reading. If you want to be like me and gain something other than BUGGER ALL for your work then click here and learn about posting on the HIVE blockchain.

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If you found this article so invigorating that you are now a positively googly-eyed, drooling lunatic with dripping saliva or even if you liked it just a bit, then please upvote, comment, rehive, engage me or all of these things.



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33 comments
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Lol. You and your head first escapades!

Bingo halls, that's quite a throwback memory. Do they still have them? Is it dead except for holiday camps and the like?

It's cool of Urban Mike to get his own stickers, his mum must bea good sort!

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Lol. You and your head first escapades!

I have been doing exercises to try and supple my body up a bit. It's fucking hard sticking your legs through small holes they wont reach!

Bingo halls, that's quite a throwback memory. Do they still have them? Is it dead except for holiday camps and the like?

Gala Bingo have stitched up the market. There's one in our local town.

It's cool of Urban Mike to get his own stickers, his mum must bea good sort!

Sadly, I heard his mum has passed away recently. I guess no more exploring for him. The stickers..., I am not a fan really.. it breaks the code.

'Leave nothing but footprints'

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It does indeed break that code. For a kid though, he might be the forerunners of the new generation. Smashing the rules and the boundaries. Creating a new EMPIRE!

Or he could be a wee bugger that likes making a mess. Shame about his mum tho.

Gala, yeah, that's the one my mum used to go to but it closed. I don't know of any in Glasgow now. Maybe in some of the poorer bits

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It does indeed break that code. For a kid though, he might be the forerunners of the new generation. Smashing the rules and the boundaries. Creating a new EMPIRE!

The OG explorers hate this kind of behaviour. Me.., I tolerate it. Whatever!

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Bend them knees, elbows and shoulders another climb to explore, yikes old establishments still standing!

@tipu curate 2

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I am trying to train my ageing body to climb again, and it is working a little. It only takes me 20 seconds to do what I could in 25 now hehe...

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Few choice words in sailors language normally gets you up quicker, try that, it works for me....

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Two little ducks! I know bugger all about bingo. Another British institution I have not experienced, but I assume it's big given how many bingo halls there used to be. Seems to be online a lot now. I guess they weren't going to spend much on doing up a place like that. Looks like it will fall down soon anyway.

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I know little about it either. Gambling is a vice I keep well away from in the traditional sense.

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Wow, what a shit hole that place is!

I take you got back down easy enough down the dodgy ladder?

A couple of rungs higher and that would have been me out!

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LOL, yes it was.., but I have been in much worse. The floors were stable!

Getting out was not a big deal, just go backwards. Climbing the muddy slope was a little more challenging. I felt sorry for the young trees around the area. They got some abuse that day.

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I'm sure they are used to abuse if they are next to a motorway!

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Finding forgotten content is a plus.

Seeing your legs sticking out of holes in walls is always hilarious.

The holes in the floor - yikes! Watch your step in there.

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The holes in the floor - yikes! Watch your step in there.

Inside was surprisingly stable. There did not appear to be an 'upstairs' and so I was never in danger of falling very far.

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Okay gotcha. Well thats good then

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The only thing I think of when I think of Bingo is.

bedraggled old women, who chain-smoke

I was a little surprised that you didn't find a lifetime supply of tin ashtrays. ;-)

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Clickity-duck - nice one !
!PIZZA

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What a fun… but not much to see inside.
Luckily you are ok, sliding down that side.

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Gosh it'd be fun to spend an afternoon with the ghosts of the bingo club. I bet their a jolly lot looking at their cards, sipping cocktails , wearing lucky charms...I can just hear in the distance. "One Little Duck" or "One Fat Lady" . Another amazing adventure into the past via architecture @slobberchops

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They are all 'mini-adventures'. That's why I like this so much!

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Well you're brillant at it so thanks for letting us come along , it's always fascinating.

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you don't half find em!!!!! love the ladder!

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A communal device ready for the next explorer (it's probably been chucked on the motorway by now!).

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share and share alike I guess, how many of the 15 did you complete at the weekend

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Wow that is a bingo win for you today, making the highest post payout with this Bingo Hall lol.

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