Dark Moments

Depression is real.

It's one of the realest things out there and one of its strengths is its ability to come in different forms.

As real as depression is, one can still find people taking it lightly as if it's a fickle thing that doesn't demand optimal attention. On the internet, everyone claims to be depressed and I feel that it's not helping those who are actually going through it because the symptoms they display on social media do not really give insight to how it is in reality and as such the society frowns and concludes that depression is just another to chase clout and probably dupe people of money.

It's really sad that it has gotten to this extent.

In some extreme cases, I have seen videos of people attempting to commit suicide in public without any help from the public. Though I was told that if one tries to prevent someone from jumping over a bridge, the police will be called and the helper would be arrested on the charge of attempted murder.

All I did was shake my head in sorrow and disappointment.
We have really lost our way.

The only help that the public can offer now is to stand at a far distance to video the whole thing though some might make effort by trying to talk sense to the person but that's about the height of it as all those talks barely yield anything good.

---

Image is mine

---

Like I said, depression comes in different ways and depression is different to everyone because people exhibit different signs of depression.

There was a time in my life where I was on the verge and it was because it felt like I was stagnant, not moving forward, not doing the things that I promised myself that I'd do due to unforeseen circumstances though I put in effort it seemed like my efforts were useless and then I slowly began to think that nothing I do would ever be good or great.

I didn't come to this conclusion at once, it was a gradual thing and it grew with each passing day until I read a book which helped me change my outlook on life.

Someone said that one of the enemies of progress in the world today is comparing ourselves and our successes to that of others, especially those we see on social media. I realized that I was comparing myself to a lot of my mates who seemed to have made it already while I was still stuck in one place and that thought grew until I was slowly sinking into the big black hole called depression.

I'd see my friends living the life on social media and I felt like I wasn't doing something right when in fact I was doing everything wonderfully well. This sad state of mine further worsened when I was delayed admission into the university and it felt like the world was coming down on me and I didn't have anyone supporting me during the dark times.

That period was really gray for me.

After reading a book that I came across online, the author dedicated a chapter to teach about the danger of comparing oneself to others and how it destroys all that one has built. The chapter made me see the error of my ways and how I was slowly killing myself because I thought that my own version of being successful was going to be like that of social media, but it wasn't so.

I learned how to journal, I learned how to take it easy on myself and always show appreciation to myself and those around me because it is what we give out that will come back to us. I decided to develop healthy habits which helped me take lots of time off the internet. I began to read and then I began to write.

I started speaking words of affirmations to myself and to those around me. I became more lively at home and I began to see beauty everywhere. I also learned that failure is not really a bad thing but a way to learn and get better and I realized that I was very scared of failing and when I did fail, my whole world shook.

I was young and like every other young person out there, I expected things to just go smoothly which I had to learn the hard way that wasn't so in reality.

Life isn't a bed of roses they say, but it doesn't mean that we have to fold each time life throws an obstacle at us. The obstacles only make us stronger and I have learned to leave everything to God especially when I have done everything within my power and yet it yields nothing. The universe will always find a way to sort itself out and that's just how it is.

Once I finally accepted that fact, I have been doing better at managing failure and successes. It is normal to fail and I have learned to deal with it.

---

---