Welcome to the Hotel California
On my way back to La Paz I stopped by the town of Todos Santos. Not that I really had a reason for it. It added about 2 km to my ride, but shaved off a bit of climbing. Both pretty insignificant. But it was a last minute decision between seeing nothing but a whole lot of highway all day, or riding through a bit of town in between. It was 7 a.m. so I didn't expect anything to be open, though a fruit stand would always be welcome, or maybe a convenience store to buy some electrolite water. Oh yeah, and then there is the famous Hotel California.
When people hear this name, they typically think of the famous Eagles song from 1977. And not surprisingly, this particular hotel has been frequently associated with the song. Is it the hotel described in the lyrics? Did this hotel inspire the band to write the song? In both cases the answer is NO! And it seems like the Eagles really made sure about that... But first, let's sum up the history of this place:
In 1950 a certain Mr. Wong who later changed his name to Don Antonio Tabasco built the hotel. It was the first place in town to offer such luxuries as ice and gasoline, but the desert highway was a mere dirt road (the terracería I've come to know so well) until 1980's. Also, by the time the song came out, the hotel wasn't doing very well, and soon closed down. It wasn't until 2001 that it was reopened as a boutique hotel, in the renewed style of Mexican chique, drawing tourists and turning the town into a "Pueblo Mágico".
And so it came, that this refurbished old hotel, built in the Spanish mission style, on the decently paved dark desert highway 19, with the iconic name, suggested visitors to associate it with the Eagle's song about ... loss of innocence? American decadence? Hollywood experience? - You can draw your own conclusions! However, the Eagles didn't like this one bit. How could some Mexican hotel profit from a song they wrote forty years before?!?
And thus they files a lawsuit in 2017. In the end, the Hotel could keep its name, but it had to disassociate itself from the song and the band. I have no idea what that means in practice, but I was curious to explore it. Had I arrived when the restaurant was open, I might have ordered some pink champagne on ice (or rather one of those sparkling pink mineral waters), and maybe some kind of beast I could stab with my steely knife. I could have danced in the courtyard a bit, and taken lots of pictures. Would they have let me? Knowing the fuss the Eagles made, I kinda have my doubts. I'm sure if I posted a video of it on YouTube, it would get taken down. (Not from Hive though, thankfully!)
So what's up with the Eagles, really? When was the last time these fabulous musicians created a hit? Why should they not let a hotel simply keep using its original name? (Yeah, couldn't the hotel claim in the same way, that the Eagles made a profit by stealing THEIR name for the song?) For all of these reasons, I have decided to publish my own version of the lyrics to Hotel California I rewrote while I was struggling with the terracerías I described in one of my previous posts.
Baja California
South on that two-lane blacktop
Trucks screamed past my ear
No shoulder, no escape route
Just the roar and the fear
Up ahead in the distance
There was no off-ramp in sight
My knuckles white, my pulse a frantic drum
I rode through the glaring sunlight
So I turned to the dirt road
It had a silence so deep
And I thought, "This is peaceful, right?"
But the price, it was steep
Then the sand grabbed my valve stem
Ripped it clean from the tube
I rode for miles through the soft, dry mire
My body ached and grew rude
Welcome to the Baja road of sand
Such a dusty place (such a dusty place)
Such a dusty face
Plenty of flats on the Baja road of sand
Any time you steer
You can find one here
My tires were worn and thinning
My tubes were toast, you see
I blew through three by Friday noon
And then three more for me
I found a shop that was shuttered tight
No hope behind its doors
But the owner pulled two tires from the garbage can
Said, "They're still better than yours!"
I asked him for a patch kit
He just shook his head
"These tires are garbage, but they'll hold if you ride slowly instead"
And I rolled out with his kindness
No coin was exchanged
But the flats kept coming, one by one by one
My hope grew strained and strange
Welcome to the Baja road of sand
Such a dusty place (such a dusty place)
Such a dusty face
Plenty of flats on the Baja road of sand
Any time you steer
You can find one here
I rolled into a beach camp
With my strength all spent
Then my last tube blew right there
Every patch was rent
Then I saw it in the shallows
A pelican dead and gray
I thought, "I could end up just like that bird
I may never leave this bay!"
Two days on that beachhead
With no way to roll
And I thought, "This desert has captured me
Body, mind, and soul"
Then on the third morning
A jeep appeared in haze
They loaded me and my busted bike
And drove me from that maze
Last thing I remember
I was climbing in the cab
Watching dust fade to pavement
And the road I'd never grab
"Relax," said the driver
"We are built to help and give
You can break down any place you like
But we'll help you live."