I have a diagnosis!

I've come to a point in my life where I stopped to finally realize who I really am and one of the realizations is me finding my emotions and knowing what I like and feel and that's my diagnosis. Were you thinking it's a health issue? Oh no!

For the last few days, we had constant sunshine in my country and a lot was going through my head that left me feeling like a loner, I felt the world should just end and many weird things like that. The sun added to my many problems by releasing heat and getting my brain all heated and fucked up. The street was noisy from the constant disturbing noise of passing cars and it was as if everything was against me but…. I had HIVE. I mean y'all🥺, I read different nature posts, especially the amazing one from @riverflows. I felt really connected to that post by looking at the lovely images she shared and her brilliant elaboration about the walk really helped silence some pessimistic voices in my head.

@creativemary came around too and she said some nice things to me which really made me feel there are still some beautiful souls out there, people who care about others without caring if they've ever met the person physically or not, they just have beautiful hearts and reach out. I really felt the love and my mind felt a little at home.

Yesterday, I had to be off even though I made a few comments on some people's posts, I just can't leave this place because I feel connected around here. Somehow it gives me peace of mind and an escape from being pessimistic.

Where I come from, the woods as y'all know it is quite dangerous and one may get abducted, killed or bullied etc as some bad humans hang around those areas a lot especially if one trails that path alone. I avoid those places and rather dwell on what I can read from others. I figured that I connect well with nature especially when it's cold; cold here means in the woods with trees, cool breeze, sweet bird songs and lots more. I figured that from reading through many many nature posts here.

Back to the main reason for this writing, the diagnosis is something called chrysalism. Do you know what it means? I'll explain for those that may not know;

Chrysalism is the tranquility and peace that you feel when you're indoors during a thunderstorm.

^{This definition is obtained from the web. I had to get it so as not to confuse anyone.}

It rained last night and there was a mighty thunderstorm. A lot of people I know panicked but I figured I was at peace with myself the whole time and such peace was what has been lacking in my life lately. I figured that anytime it rains and there's a thunderstorm, I tend to have this inner peace and tranquility that I even sleep like a baby without having nightmares. For once I sat down to ask myself why this happens every time and then I had to search it up on Google to be sure that I was still thinking like a real human being and yep that was where I got my diagnosis. It did feel good that for once I found my path, for once I figured something about me that meant a lot, for once I had a diagnosis that didn't need pills to resolve, for once again I felt peace.

I breathed in and out and slept so well. I did dream of being in the woods BTW and I met nice people, I think I was still thinking of @riverflows nice nature post. Haha.

It's been amazing here on hive. Sometimes bad thoughts crawl into my head and want me to end it all but when I look at some happy faces, funny writings, mesmerizing images and good foods shared by different people I know I have a journey ahead and a train to catch. I always want to try out new things, especially with cooking. @rem-steem knows how to make me want to light my cooker everytime with the different recipes she shares. Haha!

This post is just all about how grateful I am to be here on HIVE. It's been an amazing ride all the way and yep! There's one good news: I'm on my way to fulfilling my dreams of becoming a professional make-up artist as tomorrow will be my first class ever🥳. I'm looking forward to meeting new people and maybe I could tell one or two persons about hive.

Thank you so much for reading this far and sharing in my joy and if you really want to read the post from riverflows, you can find it here it's worth reading. You'll definitely connect to that walk for sure as she's so good at making one feel what she feels in her writings.

^pixabay