Cursed To Golf - Purgatory Made Me Agonize

Roguelike games as sports, hhmmm, imagine there's something like that for soccer. But no, there isn't and when it comes to golfing in literal purgatory; someone like me wonders if it's the kind you try to have fun with or one you drag yourself out for torture?

Cursed To Golf is a game by name, kind of cursed, there are times when the game isn't allowing me to have fun by playing to my own volition. Like, when it is stringent in terms of rules, mechanics, and accessibility, like it's no fun when a golf game that can be fun to play even for a roguelike, does the one thing that makes any roguelike less fun.

Still, there is a game, and surely enough, I was kind of having a blast with how it played. It encouraged me to test my limits while learn patience and planning, which is usually the case when you're golfing, but here, it requests that kind of focus for each hole. Even if I am dealing with several issues dampening the overall experience.

One day, our guy is just golfing in the real world, being hailed as the champion he is, but then lighting strikes him, and then he becomes a soul trapped somewhere between heaven and hell. The golf hell. Somebody thought it would be nice to make someone's life miserable, and that is a demon lord who likes golf and wants people to golf in his created courses.

Courses that are kind of nightmares to play in, so enter me, the only who can play, to attest to my skills and ability to learn the hard way. That games like these aren't meant to be really enjoyed, they just remind you why golfing is obnoxious and that the devil himself has made me hate it.

Fear not, because the Scotsman is here to be the guide, providing access to Ace cards of various abilities like turning your ball into a rocket, turning back runs, giving extra ball runs, scattering them to three before picking which to hit, turning them into lead to stop bounce, etc. The game's reliance on these cards are pretty high, as well as the fact that there are limited ball shots, you run out, you die, then respawn into repeating the level again.

Well, it is a Roguelike, but there are issues I have regarding the mechanics, and UI design that makes me feel rather disappointed. One thing to clear, is that the levels are predesigned, about 70 of them exists in rotation. So after prolonged playthroughs, you'll be familiarized with the course, and prospects of challenge kind of dissipates.

Then there's the direction indicator design, the pointer in the end looks a bit too big, and doesn't tell sometimes where the ball will hit impact. If you especially hit it very close to an elevated block, you are screwed as not only you can't hit it to the direction you want, but also getting it to another proper spot means losing a ball round. Though, this seems normal for golf in general.

But wait, there's more and this is the part where the game really starts to shine, and kind of falter.

Now, above here is a cursed level. This is where all the random back things can happen, and kind of switch up the difficulty because you have a number of things going on. First up is that if the ball gets caught in the grave, it makes the level even harder because of you have to perfectly get the ball to bounce off the wedge. This is after the first few hours, and it stays hard to play from that point on. Not to mention the random curses after certain runs, the devil likes to keep things interesting.

On an average level, you have to deal with large ponds of water, grass and dirt which requires you to use different clubs to get the ball out, deal with TNTs, and so on. But on the flip side, if you manage to use the ACE cards well enough, you can do so much with it. There's even a point in the game where it unlocks the ability to spin the ball in any direction you want after its first bounce. Or get the balls into teleporters to skip the extra rounds.

Basic gist is that it asks any player to have patience, precision, planning, and the right spot to plot your tee next. Which isn't an easy ask given how kind of obtuse the level design is, and the visual information problems that it has. There are some that can be fixed I believe by the developers, but doesn't change how wack the experience becomes overall. If all goes according to play, this is how it goes.

I like the premise of the game, I don't think I'll like golf, but what's the harm in playing a 2D miniaturized version of it? Well, this game exists, and the hellish aspects also come along with the fun of it. Some people's mileage will vary, but mine was kind of thrown off despite how much I wanted to keep going.

Who knows what'll happen next, because judging by how popular this game is becoming, I think the best way to know is by abiding time when the dev decides to make good changes.

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