When I Was Still The Cool Aunt

I believe most things happen the way they ought to and there's usually no deep meaning or reason for it, it just happens. If we were to see the future or go back to the past and alter it, the alteration is actually what was meant to happen. That's just me though.

🕘 Stop time
If you had the ability to stop time (and remain there) which year, moment, event or era would you choose, and why?

If I could go back to the past, it would be the year 2018 when my niece Arielle was born. Arielle is the daughter of my brother and his ex-wife, a beautiful girl that made everyone smile and brought peace in the midst of squabbles.

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my brother and his mini-me

I have a skill in sensing tension amongst people and noticing weird vibes from people. The whole situation between my brother and his ex was weird to me from the very beginning but I was supportive of his decision to get married to this person still.

I didn't think they were a good match because the vibe was obviously not there and it never made sense to me how that was going to work. Both families never vibed either and I generally avoided being involved and acted ignorant when they had their back and forth.

I remained cordial with all parties and when Arielle was born, I got even closer and focused on the baby. I finally had a little one to hold and care for and I loved her like she came out of me.

She was born about a month before I had to leave home for my national service and I made good use of that one month in spending time with her. I would stare at her all day, sleeping peacefully in her cot and releasing smelly baby farts. It was all so precious.

It was sad for me leaving just a little over a month and my consolation was that I'd see her over video calls and then come back home after a year. Almost two years later I was back home and surprisingly, Arielle remembered me from all the video calls we made.

I saw her regularly despite the usual family brouhaha and my days with her were some of my best. I also really liked how she kept my parents, her grandparents, on their toes.

So apart from Sept 2018, July 2020 to June 2021 was the time I spent with Arielle and I would love to go back to those times. I live in a different city now but that's not the issue, the thing is Arielle's parents are officially divorced now and that has caused a clear divide.

Even my parents don't get to see her often and that is just sad because she's their only grandchild. I wish I could say things would get better but if I'm being blunt, it looks like I've lost my niece and our side of the family will in no time be strangers to her.

I'm happy her parents did what was best for them, but in my quiet time, it has made me cry thinking of the bond with Arielle that I was so happy about been broken because her parents are incompatible and there isn't a very cordial relationship amongst everyone.

If I could stop time, I would stop it at the very beginning, the moment I stepped into the private ward where Arielle was alone with her mum and then all the grandparents and her father joined in. In that moment there was peace as we all stared at our newborn and everyone agreed she looked like me.

I miss that feeling from that hospital ward because it was so genuine. I can only hope that as Arielle grows, she feels the love that we all have for her even if we are sort of shielded from her.



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13 comments
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5 years this has been happening to me, it started here, around people that are still here. Homeland security has done nothing at all, they are not here to protect us. Dont we pay them to stop shit like this? The NSA, CIA, FBI, Police and our Government has done nothing. Just like they did with the Havana Syndrome, nothing. Patriot Act my ass. The American government is completely incompetent. The NSA should be taken over by the military and contained Immediately for investigation. I bet we can get to the sources of V2K and RNM then. https://peakd.com/gangstalking/@acousticpulses/electronic-terrorism-and-gaslighting--if-you-downvote-this-post-you-are-part-of-the-problem

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I like people opt for divorce or seperation, than staying put in an incompatible relationship but it is unfair if there isn’t balance expecially when a child is involved.

I completely understand how your parents are feeling, it is really not fair arielle is far from her paternal family.

Maybe you could reach out to the mum or something, regular video calls won’t be a bad idea at least🥺

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I try to keep in touch but I always get an excuse whenever I request to see her face. It was understandable at first but it started looking like a deliberate action to be unreachable. Sigh.

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Wow... that is so unreasonable...

I guess the best thing to do is wait it out and give it time...

Eventually Arielle would be independent enough to know what’s best for her

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Hi Precious

Gosh that's a tough one and I'm so sorry you feel like you've lost her. I know that the birth of a baby can be a great conquerer of the divide in families but it seems like there was no real way that your brother and Arielle's mom could stay together if they weren't compatible. I like @estherscott 's suggestion of maybe contacting her mom and asking - there's no real harm in asking, explain how much you miss Arielle and what she means to you. I think it's worth a shot at least.

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Her mum and I are cool, at least that's what it looks like on the surface. But she's always busy with work and I don't get to video chat.

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Shame man, that's just sad. I hope that things change for the better and you get that close bond back.

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What a shame this is Precious. Your niece is adorable though. Unfortunately when so many parents split up or divorce it is the children that suffer. Having read the comments, it seems you tried on many occasions to see Arielle and the mother was having none of it:(
I am sure that in Arielle's eyes you are still the cool aunt, and I hope that in time you will be able to see more of her again.
Thanks for sharing your Time thoughts and have a great new week:)

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Divorce can be extremely difficult, yet it is sometimes the best option. You proved you were a good aunt with the limited time you spent with Arielle, and you can continue to be one by finding time to spend with her. Whatever happens, family will always remain family.

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