Aussies in New Zealand: A joke between mates

Unless you are an Australian or a New Zealander you won't understand the relationship people from the two countries have with one another. I'm not sure friendship covers it though, hence my use of the word rivalry in my title, however I prefer to call it a friendship.

Just a little background.
No, the two countries are not the same. We have different governments, different laws, different money...Different everything in fact. Aussie's don't like being called New Zealander's and vice versa; Doing so is like calling Canadian's Americans, Pakistani's Indians, or Scots and Irish English I suppose. We are completely different nations and we don't like being called the wrong thing.

We pick on each other mercilessly though, Kiwi's and Aussies - It's brutal at times to be honest. We argue over rugby, cricket, netball, sailing, ping pong, board games, anything really...Each saying our teams are the best and we tease each other about accents too; If you haven't heard a New Zealand accent it is actually completely different to that of an Aussie - It's weird. So we pick on each other and we are brutal with the New Zealander's, like they are with us. It's just how we roll. I suppose the left would call it bullying these days, but the two countries see it for what it is; A little fun.

One of the most common and probably disrespectful things Aussie's say about New Zealander's is about their love of sheep. We don't mean that they like them...More that they like to love them...With their private parts. You know...We call them sheep fu^^ers - But all good-naturedly of course. They return-serve with equally brutal fashion. The slur, going either way, is often met with a laugh and return slur. Again, it's what we do.

Of course, there's a time and place for such behaviour but in the main that sort of banter is common between the two countries [in the right situation] and is accepted within the closed-loop that is the relationship we share. There's a deeper relationship going on though, one forged in the crucible of war, in the trenches of World War One, and punctuated by the deep respect we have for each other.

The two countries served [as individual countries] after being called upon by the British Empire. We served together, fought and died, with those coming home from the war equally changed - Left to face the condition now known as PTSD in silence, alone or collectively with our mates. We were called the ANZAC's and our proud history on the battlefield bonds us together more closely than anything else could.

Australian New Zealand Army Corps (ANZAC) is what they called us and the forces, commanded by General Birdwood, operated together initially in the ill-fated Gallipoli Campaign - A World War One theatre that covered nine months and was messed up royally by the British Command. Thousands of the lads died in senseless diversionary actions or frontal assaults against firmly entrenched Turkish defenders supported by Germans. The troops suffered greatly on that campaign and whilst the probably brutally attacked and bullied each other, when they cam together against a common enemy they were one and the same: ANZAC's.

The ANZAC's lost many men in that campaign but went on to fight in other WWI theatres and again in WWII and the Vietnam War - Called the *American War by the North Vietnamese people.

For any of you who have served or have acted as an element of a cohesive unit you'll understand the bond of brotherhood, or indeed sisterhood for that matter. It's a firm bond. In war, life and death situations make that bond seem somewhat stronger. ANZAC soldiers fought for his mates, those besides him, and not for themselves. It's the type of ethos that builds firm relationships. Scratch the surface of any military unit and you'll find it.

The First World War helped forge a bond between the men and women [nurses] who served and subsequently the two countries afterwards. It's a bond hammered together in the heat of battle, through blood, death and, of course life. It gives us the right to call each other names, to say rude things about sex with sheep and other equally terrible things...But beyond all that we stand together, and if one or the other needs a mate to lean on we know they're there. [Unless it's on the sporting field and then we simply have at each other...A war of sorts.]

Coming here, seeing this land...It's foreign to me but also feels like home. Sure, they talk funny and call stuff weird names which I'll write about when I get home, but it feels like home. We feel welcome, sort of like a cousin, or close friend visiting for the weekend.

Whilst here in NZ I have visited a couple of war memorials and paid my respects, just like I do when I travel around Australia. I believe, moving forward, people will care less about this sort of thing, but I do and will continue with it; Those that came before us deserve to be remembered. What happens when I'm gone won't bother me.

So, this post was prompted by a book I ran into at the gift store at the Skyline Queenstown. It's a book full of jokes about Aussie's however the jokes generally could be applied to any nationality. There's some funny ones in there too. If I changed the nationality connotation on each joke they'd apply to a New Zealander also...But, you know what? I'm in a good mood so I'll let them have this round.

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