@fireguardian's The Bizzare Story

Hi everyone and welcome to this right here. This is a contest hosted by @fireguardian where he starts a story and you finish it whichever way you like. The quoted part is his beginning and the rest is my continuation.
_{I promise it's going to be so much fun!😃👍}

Wake up... wake up... WAKE UP!!! That scream in my head made me open my eyes and jump up from where I was laying. I took a look around and couldn't remember where I was. I tried to stay standing but 3 out of my 6 legs were too week, so I fell on the floor again. Wait, I have 6 legs? I look down and only saw 2, so why am I feeling like I have 6? donottrytothinktoohardabouthisyouwillonlygettired. I decided to try to stand again, forcing myself to look at my legs while I was doing it, and could get up easily. I think I'm getting used to this 2 legs ideia, I feel like I have been flying like this all my life. Wait, I'm flying? As soon as I think that, I hit the floor again and all my 6 legs hurt. trynottothinkabouthisifyouwanttogetout. Get out, seems like a good ideia. Look for a way out, a window, a door, a hole. There's a weird shape on the wall, just above the tall blind man. Wait, I'm not alone in here? How did I not see this man before? Why he only has 2 legs? I blink and he is gone, a door behind him. The shape of the wall is the shape of the keyhole. My fingers are in this shape too. I put my finger in the keyhole and the door opens...

into a big beautiful classy dining room with a huge table in the middle. A royal dinner has just been set on the table, the dinner consisted of all sorts of food that you could imagine. Multiple variations of rice, beans, all sorts of fruits and vegetables, huge chunks of meat: a full roasted pig 🐖, goat🐐, chicken, and what have you! Then there was also all the various drinks and beverages you know.

My mouth watered at this sight and I was going to get to dinner immediately, but as I turned to look around there were other people at the table, smiling at me: Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and the freaking Queen of England and her recently deceased husband Prince Philips. The Prince was looking right at me and seemed to be subtly coaxing me to refrain from thinking or saying anything.

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But I couldn't help the feeling, I thought aloud, I must have screamed:

'How can this be possible? Prince Philips is dead, how can he be sitted right here at dinner with us!'

As soon as I said those thoughts, Prince Philips lost his hat and jacket, and went from a smile

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To a frown.

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Before I could ask what I said wrong, the dining room and every person and thing in it vanished from around me and I was left to free fall from up there because it turns out the dining room had been at the top floor of a sky scraper. I screamed as I fell. Dontfuckingthinkaboutitmotherfucker! I struggled, flinging my hands frantically till I gave out a loud fart, the fart propelled me like a rocket. Goddamn! I farted again and it kept propelling me. Woo! I just kept farting and learning to control the movements, farting everytime I was losing altitude. I got so good at it so I stayed in the air, I didn't fly out of earth but rather decided to fly around the city.

I now saw the Central Bank up ahead, I cruised into it through a window and found myself in an empty room filled with money. I looked around, there were big bags there so I started loading them with money quietly, not to alert anyone. After I had spent some time loading these bags as quietly as I can, I turned and saw that there were policemen right there in the room looking at me disinterestedly.

I thought, whoa! Have these policemen been here all these while? And why were they not concerned that I was stealing? As I thought this a huge wrecking ball came in through the window and knocked down the building. The wrecking ball struck me too and flung me into a rich Chinese brothel. Luckily I had landed on a huge bed so the pains wasn't much. I rolled around the bed till the little pains wore off.

After the pains wore off, I looked around and at least 50 naked Chinese girls with huge breasts and butts were coming at me. They crowded me on the bed, kissing and touching me. I slowly sent my hands to work too, touching these girls' huge parts. Don'tdon'tdon'tjustdon't!
But then I was too amazed and started to wonder why are these girls' boobies so huge and have the perfect mix of firmness and jellyness, my - my God!

As soon as I thought this zombie Kung Fu fighters bursted into the room. One was Jackie Chan, the other was Jet Li. They kicked me into another room, I tried to stand up but one knocked me with a mortal Kombat combination, laughed and said 'FATALITY!'. These guys were too fast for zombies. I laid there writhing from the pains, then I looked at my hand and saw a huge iron staff in my hands, it was so huge but yet so light. Thinkingaboutitwouldonlymakemattersworseyoufool!

I stopped immediately. I was unto something here, I now understood the entire game, anytime I think about the strange things happening in my favour, I lose them and I'm either hurt or thrown into somewhere else where I'm tested with another strange thing. It had been going like this from the beginning, in the beginning I had 6 legs but soon as I thought of it I had only 2. Before I started propelling myself with farts in the air I could fly but soon as I thought about it I hit the floor. The blind man too from the beginning, I saw him but as soon as I thought about him he was gone. But when my finger turned into a key I opened the door without thinking, I wondered about Prince Philips and everything was gone. When I started farting through the air I didn't think about it, I went to the Central Bank but when I thought about the policemen that's when I was knocked out. Again when I had those girls, it was my wonder and thought about their body parts that made me lose them. And so on and so forth. Damn!

Now I've understood what was going on, I didn't think again. I stood up with the iron staff and beat the living hell out of zombie Jet Li and Jackie Chan. When they couldn't move anymore I left them and went in search of those naked sweethearts. I broke down doors upon doors but couldn't find them. Then I saw myself lying down on a bed and a nurse smiling at me. The nurse had very huge breasts too but the transition into this place seemed to have affected my memory, I must have forgotten the rules because I found myself thinking aloud:

'Why are her boobs so huge, my fucking God!'

I tried to cover my mouth to stop myself from saying that out loud but it was tooate, I had already said it. Surprisingly, though, a voice replied me:

'That's just the way she was born. She's blessed. Aren't you, Nurse Theresa?'

The nurse smiles. I now see her name tag, her name was Theresa. I turn to look at the person who replied me, it was a man of about 30 in a black suit. There were also three doctors in lab coats. That's when I remembered I was in Nike's laboratory. Nike the sports wear brand:

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I remembered just now, I had come to their studio for their 'Just Do It' contest where they'll put you in a simulation and your success depends on just doing without really thinking. Oh my, the simulation was so perfect I didn't remember I was in a game. I must have failed woefully. Or have I? I ask the man in suit:

'Did I fail woefully, Sir?'

'Woefully is quite an understatement. You failed more than woefully, my man.'

My heart breaks. And I become frustrated and angry at the same time. How could I have caught unto the game so slowly and late? The simulation kept reminding me not to think by saying 'don'tthink' and other similar warnings but it took me so long to get it. And how could I NOT have come to understand the game before I atleast met those juicy Chinese girls? Imagine the fun I would have had in that simulation if I understood it in time for the Chinese girls. I started to weep immediately. I ask:

'Sir, can I please get one more chance? I promise to do better this time.'

'No second chances, other contestants are waiting, you have to leave now, young man.'

My anger builds.

'I can't leave, not without spending quality time with those Chinese girls. Let me go back, please!'

The man beckons and security comes, I try to run but they tackle me and drag me out. I scream and hurl insults at everyone as I'm being dragged out:

'Fuck Nike! Stupid contest! No one told me I wouldn't remember I was in a contest during the simulation! It messed with my memory! How could I not remember the rules of the contest! You denied me my Chinese swidis, I'm going to sue Nike! Fucking bastards!'

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_{Posted via proofofbrain.io}