I #suspect my sister had good intentions when she mailed me a birthday card for the first time in our lives.

Our family was never big on remembering birthdays anyway, and after so many years, I flat-out quit buying and mailing cards, or making cards from scratch. Calendars, clocks, and commitments make me want to go live in a cave on a desert island. But only if I still have wi-fi because, inexplicably, stupidly, I continue to treasure the sharing of information and ideas with other human beings.

The pandemic gave me an excuse to resume my last-century habit of greeting cards in the mail. Snail mail. Postage stamps are what, 54 cents each now? Not even two for a dollar. I'm so old, I remember the ten-cent stamp. My grandma never recovered from the shock of no longer having a penny (once cent! honest!) stamp. Even in the 1980s, Grandma would mail a birthday card with a one-dollar bill in it. Enough, back then, for a cup of coffee. (This was before Starbucks.) Thanks Grandma!

So, my sister, who has bullied me all the years of my life, happened across this "perfect" card for me.

"It's not surprising that you're getting better with age....

....You left yourself plenty of room for improvement."

"Love you in spite of all your faux pas! have a great day" - Love, the Lion

She didn't even put my name on the card. Not a nickname ("Burl") nor "Sis" nor the unthinkable "Carol."

I suspect she wrote it "faux paws," which would be clever, given her new nickname, The Lion. But her handwriting isn't so easy to discern. And I suspect she is not that clever. I also suspect she has no idea that she has a pretty big list of "faux paws" of her own and that I love her "in spite of" all her bullying and teasing and yelling at me over the years.

Sisters.

I supsect we all love our siblings and parents, unconditionally, without reservation.

Now, to reflect on all my blunders and faux pas.

Or not.

As for birthdays, I have grievously offended some casual friends by failing to remember theirs, but they grievously offended me by repeatedly mailing me Hallmark cards after I told them I DO NOT CELEBRATE MY BIRTHDAY, so why would they keep wasting money mailing me the dreaded Hallmark card, then getting mad at me for not sending them birthday greetings?

Why am I such a Grinch about birthdays? That would be a topic for some other post. Suffice to say, I do not consider it a faux pas to evade the obligatory cards, token gifts, and canned greetings on social media.

P.S. I also suspect know that she has no idea her childhood nickname for me has an added connotation.

Burl:

burl. [ bûrl ]
A large, rounded outgrowth on the trunk or branch of a tree in which the grain has grown in a deformed manner.
Wood of a mottled veneer, usually cut from such a growth.
A knot or lump in thread or cloth.

I prefer this definition (ssh, don't tell my sister):

What is Burl Wood? It's Weirder Than You Think!

A burl is a cool-looking, extraneous growth on a tree. Ugly on the outside, but magnificent on the inside, it can form on any type of tree! A burl usually grows when the tree is undergoing some stress, whether it be an injury, virus, or fungal infection.

Ooh, it gets even better! (Gotta love the internet!)

Burls yield a very peculiar and highly figured wood sought after in woodworking, and some items may reach high prices on the wood market. Poaching of burl specimens and damaging the trees in the process poses a problem in some areas. source: wiki/Burl

Ok, yes, I've squandered far more than five minutes on this little exercise in freewriting.

Did I not mention my weird propensity for sharing information? Surely y'all wondered, as I did:

The plural form of faux pas is also faux pas.

And ya'll know it's not pronounced Fox Paws.

"Faux Pas" by Margaret Carspecken, Robert Carsprecken

"Faux Pas (pronounced American-fashion, 'fox paws') is the story of Randy and his animal friends, most of whom were trained to be studio animal actors - the animals you see in movies, commercials and in live stage shows. Most of them are now retired, officially or through lack of opportunity, and eke out an existence as best they can while avoiding being hunted, eaten or sold. The main setting for the series is Green Mountain Studio Animals (GMSA), a run-down farm in the Colorado Rockies. They fully realize that they exist at the whim of their human owners, but Randy's new owners are content to let him and his friends live pretty much as they please.

Tossed into the mix are a herd of housecats who think of Randy as their personal cat toy. Chief among the cats is Kira, who tries to help Randy when she can just to keep him from being so predictable. Also prominent in Randy's life is Cindy, a wilderness vixen who finds him charming and attractive, if confusing.
Webcomic URL: http://www.ozfoxes.com/fauxpas.htm

Written (how many days late?) in response to last week's prompt (because, calendars!),

Day 1277: 5 Minute Freewrite: Tuesday - Prompt: suspect