The Icy Stretch

avatar

photo-1507703212197-b24b18bbd7c6.jpeg

Jaime was seating at the dining room table, his old transistor radio was in pieces before him as he quietly soldered a capacitor onto the panel. This radio had been his father's and held so many childhood memories. He was not ready to give it up just yet.

As he began to couple the pieces once more, Angela, his wife came up behind him and looked over his shoulder.

"What is it this time?" She asked, seeing nothing but scraps and junk on the table.

"The radio could not tune to stations anymore. "

"Shouldn't that be the antenna's job?" She asked.

"No, the antenna gets signal. This capacitor helps in tuning to the channel of your choice."

"Of course." She rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Last week it was the power button that needed to be changed. The week before it was the antenna that broke. Every week you keep working on this radio. Don't you get tired?"

"My love, how can I get tired? It's my Dad's, so if it can still be saved I have to save it."

"Yeah, I know. Is Caleb still playing ball?"

"I think so."

"Let me go get him. He's gonna need to shower before dinner."

Caleb was their six-year-old son. And at the moment, the family was on vacation in Angela's ancestral cabin. Like Jamie's radio, the place held a lot of memories for her as well.

The cabin was surrounded by trees and nature, it was isolated from the rest of civilization. A perfect place to relax the mind from the rigors of the city where they lived. And it had a beautiful view of the lake. But at the moment, the lake was frozen into ice and so Angela and Jamie had forbidden Caleb from going there.

With the grace of someone who knew what he was doing, Jamie covered up the radio and took a screw to fasten them together. That was when he heard the scream.

It sounded like his wife was in trouble.

He dropped everything he was doing and leaped up.

"Jamie!" The scream came again.

He dashed out of the cabin, almost wrenching the door off its hinges.

"Angela!!" He cried.

"I'm here!" She called back, from the side of the cabin. "It's Caleb!"

Jaime ran to her, she was on the edge of the frozen lake. And their son was far off in the middle, on top of the ice.

"Oh my God!!" He gasped.

Caleb was holding his ball and looking at them. He was scared as his mother kept screaming and his father kept gesturing at him. He could not hear what they were saying clearly. Underneath him, he saw a crack appear in the ice.

He didn't know what that meant yet, but he knew it couldn't be good. He looked at his father again.

"Come on, buddy!" Jaime was saying, almost in tears. "You can do it!"

And Caleb took a step.

"Jaime," Angela called, tugging at his sleeve, "the cracks."

Like spider webs, more cracks were appearing all around Caleb.

Jaime cursed, then continued urging his son. "Faster, buddy! Just a little more!"

Caleb kept coming closer, clutching his ball tight. The ice beneath him was wobbly, almost making him fall.

"I have to go there," Jaime said and tried to step into the ice, but Angela pulled him back.

"He's just a kid and his weight is causing all those cracks. Your weight would punch a hole through it."

"But..."

"Caleb can do it." She said, not just for him but also for herself. She needed to believe it also. Then, raising her voice, "come on, baby! You have to walk a little bit faster for me!"

Caleb kept walking, one step at a time.

He still didn't know why his parents were shouting at him. He guessed it was because he was in trouble. His father had warned him not to get on the ice, but he had disobeyed. That had not been his fault though, he had been playing ball when he mistakenly kicked it on the ice. And he had gone to take it. It was not his fault.

As he got closer, he noticed his mother was crying. That's when he knew something was seriously wrong.

Just then, the ice beneath him wobbled harder than ever as a jagged section broke off completely.

"Caleb!!" Both parents screamed as he fell, landing hard on the ice. The ball slipped out of his grip and rolled back further over the ice.

"My ball!!!" Caleb cried and made to go after it.

"Screw this!" Jaime ran into the ice. Each step was like stepping on ordinary water. His football was breaking the ice.

He got to Caleb just as he was about to run after the ball.

"My ball!" The six-year-old resisted as he was scooped up.

Jaime said nothing, simply hugging him close to his chest and turning around, he began to run fast.

"Hurry!!" Angela cried out in anguish.

He had to be on the move, he could not afford to fall. Anything that made his weight stationary would send him through the ice.

He kept running, the thuds of his feet breaking even more ice. Just as he closed in on the edge, almost safe at last, his foot landed on a particularly thin patch of ice. The ground collapsed under him at once and the foot went through.

"Ahh!!!" He groaned as he dropped to his knees, his foot submerged in the cold water.

Standing on the tip of her toes, on the very edge of the ice, Angela reached out and took Caleb from him.

As Jaime was about to pull himself up, the crack widened underneath him and he was plunged feet first into the freezing water. He was submerged in seconds.

The water was so cold he could barely think. He looked up and saw the hole in the ice getting further and further away. He was sinking. Not daring to breathe, he began to swim upward. His strokes felt seak and lazy, his entire body felt heavy. But he managed to break the surface, coughing loudly as he tried to hold on to the ice for support.

He could not see Angela or Caleb, could he have resurfaced in another place?

The ice was slippery, his fingers were numb and kept sliding off no matter how hard he dug them in. He was getting tired from constantly kicking his legs to stay afloat.

He was losing it, the cold was getting to him. His eyes began to close, his kicking legs slowed down, his fingers began to slide off for the last time...

"Jamie!!!" His wife's scream snapped his eyes open at once, fusing him with a burst of adrenaline. He could survive this!

She was holding a long stick as she ran back to the lake. She held out one end to him. He grabbed it for dear life.

And with all the strength she could muster, Angela began to pull. And as he got more ground, he climbed out of the freezing water, crawled off the ice, and collapsed on solid ground. Breathing hard and fast, his body trembling from the cold as he lay sprawled on the edge of the frozen lake.

"Jamie..." Angela cried as she took off her coat and wrapped him up in it.

"Caleb?" He muttered, it seemed to take all his energy.

"He's inside. He's fine. Come on, let's go inside."

With a grunt, he pushed himself to his feet. Then resting on her shoulders for support, they made their way back into the warm comforts of home.


The End.

Image by Alberto Tondo

Feel free to chat me up via my Discord handle below:
bruno-kema#1355



0
0
0.000
17 comments
avatar

Quite a suspenseful one!
I was gripped from the very moment we saw Caleb trying to walk out of the ice to his parents. For me, I don't think it's a really good idea to visit such a precarious place like a winter home situated next to a frozen lake with a six-year old. And even if that happens, one must never let such a child out of sight.

Anyway, I'm glad that this didn't turn out to be a tragic.

You've come up with yet another beautifully and expertly written piece. Well done, Bruno!

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you very much, I'm sure the parents will think twice before vacationing in the cabin later in the future.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Congratulations @bruno-kema! You have completed the following achievement on the Hive blockchain and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

You got more than 600 replies.
Your next target is to reach 700 replies.

You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word STOP

0
0
0.000
avatar

Hello @bruno-kema,
This is a gem. I have no tolerance for tragic endings, so often when I'm reading or watching a show on Netflix, I'll jump to the end of a suspenseful story. I want to know everyone gets out OK. This story I controlled myself, but I was tempted. You had me so thoroughly involved that I worried for father and son (I'm not using names😆). Thank you for letting them cross the lake safely, and thank you for an exhilarating ride.

Great story!

0
0
0.000
avatar

Hehe...
I'm glad it was an exhilarating ride.

I'm not using names😆

I see what you did here😁😁👍

Thank you for reading, i'm glad you enjoyed the story

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you for posting this suspenseful story in the Ink Well community. You really took us to the limit this time. And, thank you for engaging consistently with your fellow Ink Well authors.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you very much, i'm glad i posted it here.

0
0
0.000
avatar

This story literally was breath taking... Beautifully showcases the bond of parents and their child with a pinch of suspense.. Well written Bruno ..Keep Writing more :)

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you for your kind words, i am happy you enjoyed it.
And i will surely keep writing more.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Great handling of tension, @bruno-kema. No one imagines the scenes of great danger and the struggle for survival of this family at the beginning of the narrative when we read about the wife's bored look as Jamie serenely places a screw in an old transistor radio.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Great analogy @gracielaacevedo, i guess that's just how life is.
One moment it's this way, and the next moment, it's another way.
Thank you for reading.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Great story, @bruno-kema! This is very suspenseful and gripping. There's nothing like a person stranded on ice with cracks forming all around! I was so relieved both the Caleb and Jamie were safe in the end. It did not look good for Jamie.

Would you believe I once wrote a similar story? It was published in a magazine called Portage. You can read it here. "Great minds think alike," as they say! :-)

0
0
0.000
avatar

Wow...
I've read your work, and it was astounding. Great minds do think alike.
Thank you for reading my story, i am glad you enjoyed it.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Where I live, someone actually falls through the ice every year!

0
0
0.000
avatar

Wow... That is not good at all.
Hope there are not always casualties???

0
0
0.000
avatar

Hello @bruno-kema. Young children can become victims in such a short space of time. Parents have to be vigilant at all times when outdoors. Your story is suspenseful. I knew the differences in their weight would be the factor for the son being able to withstand the break in the ice. A very dangerous situation to find oneself in when trying to determine whether to go after a child and thereby causes further danger.

I was hoping for a successful outcome and no one was seriously injured in the incident.

Thanks for sharing your story.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you for this insightful comment, i am glad you enjoyed my story.

0
0
0.000